He was one of us ......
 

A friend of mine committed suicide the other day. He was one of us, an alcoholic. Very depressing to find out about this news.

He was a nice person. I used to call him a "gifter" because every time I was around him (he lived on a farm), he would give me gifts of eggs, or bacon, or "Do you want some almonds? Fruit?" he would say. He helped my mom figure out what guns were what when my Dad died and she was selling them. She didn't know much about them, but he did. He loved the outdoors and was an excellent hunter and fisherman. I used to tell him he should move to Alaska and do tours on how to survive in the wilderness. He would have been good at it. He was also a former marine and a vet. He will have a military funeral.

He was an all day, all night drinker. Used to have what he called "breakfast beer" to get him going in the morning. In the time I knew him, I don't think I ever saw him drink anything else besides alcohol.

I used to ask him why he doesn't try to quit drinking. He would say, "What difference does it make?" I said, "Well, you would feel better in the morning, if nothing else." I guess he just didn't see a reason to quit.

He lost his job due to drinking, he lost his family (got divorced) due to his drinking, he lost his license due to drinking and now he has lost his life. He shot himself in the head two days ago.

If actions like this are not enough to stay sober because of this horrible disease, I don't know what is.

I feel depressed about it. He was a friend of mine.

Please everyone, keep trying.

You said it perfectly - it is a horrible disease. Very sad. My condolences.

i had a friend commit suicide earlier this year heard his chair went for a sandwich

also alcoholic

completly relate condolences

I'm so sorry about your friend, Cecilia. It sound like he was a beautiful soul. I agree- keep trying everyone, never give up.

so sorry for your loss Cecilia :(

Very sorry to hear this, Cecilia.

Alcohol will take everything if we keep it around.

So sad. I hear these stories too often. Alcohol so often leaves us feeling hopeless and powerless, when quitting could have led to total recovery of mind, body and spirit.

How tragic, I am so sorry.

I'm so sorry Cecilia...((hugs)). My husband's close friend lost his wife the same way. First he lost her to alcohol for about 5 years and then she also took her life the same way - she had disappeared and her mother found her in her car dead from a gunshot to the head. From the outside they appeared to have everything - lovely home, two great kids, she was an awesome cook and a beautiful woman.

Sadly her kids last memory of her was one of her being drunk and them stealing her keys from her, telling them they hated her and running out of the house to get the school bus because they didn't want her driving them or herself drunk. They were 13 and 10 at the time.

I know we are all trying to stay sober for ourselves - and sadly your friend and mine will miss out on joys they didn't realize existed. I can't quite relate to that level of despair but it is reason enough to keep trying.

Wishing your friend peace and praying for us all to keep trying to follow the path to sobriety and the path to life.

I'm very sorry for your loss.

Cecilia - I'm so very sorry for your loss.

Hugs and prayers,

Amy

I am very sorry, Cecilia; what a tragic story. Creates a myriad of emotions within.

I am sorry for your loss. It is a hideous and sad way that alcohol touches our lives.

I am so sorry for the loss of your friend. Suicide is such a tragedy.

So much lost.

It especially made me sad to think how skillful he was, and how generous. How sad to reach that level of despair when surrounded by a vibrant farm and fresh eggs and people that valued him.

I lost someone I valued last autumn to suicide. He also shot himself in the head. He had been sober for exactly a year, and then decided he could drink moderately again. His suicide was drunken, and was a public dramatic event. He was also very talented and very kind.

Staying sober, I know that I don't reach that level of despair. Drunk, well, I go someplace else sometimes when drunk, to the dark place, and in a blackout could do anything. This fear is the foundation of my sobriety.

I'm sorry you lost a friend, Cecilia.

Sounds like he was a wonderful, caring person despite his illness. I'm so sorry for your loss.

I am so very sorry, Cecilia. Hearing stories like this makes me cry.

Sending love, strength, and healing thoughts your way.

I'm sorry for your loss Cecilia.
This is indeed a relentless and callous addiction.

D

That's so horrible. May you be comforted as you deal with this loss. I was an all day/every day drinker too - I can understand him not being able to see a way out. I hope talking about it here will help. :hug:

I'm so sorry for your loss. A beautiful tribute to your friend...he sounds like a kind soul.

I'm so sorry for your Cecilia. It's very very sad. Please take time for yourself, to adjust to this terrible situation.
I agree with your post title "He was one of us...".
Because I noticed when i was actively drinking, i thought about suicide a couple times a day. My body and mind was worn down, and small things easily wore me out and frustrated me. And i'd think "I hate my life". And i could easily convince myself that continuing on wasn't worth it.
Those feelings persisted after i quit drinking, but the strength of the feeling lessened as time went on. It's my personal feeling that drinking was causing my dark moods, because of the up-down-up-down cycle of drinking & hangover.
I also asked my doctor to prescribe an anti-depressent, and i stayed on that for 8 months. I tapered off them and luckily for me, i was able to stay off them.
But if i felt as blue as i used to, i'd go right back on them.
I'm mourning with you Cecilia. It's a tragedy and it's terribly painful.