complete mess
Member
Join Date: Sep 2014
Posts: 349
erin, Please keep moving forward in your sobriety. It is hard in the beginning, trust me, I KNOW and I am only on Day 8, but it slowly gets easier.
The first week I was a sad, tearful being, now past the first week, I am just feeling slightly irritated, but somewhat better. The beginning is hard and going to be hard, so plan for it.
I too drank about 30 drinks a week, but my last night drinking I had 12 drinks in a space of about 4 hours. No ifs, ans, or buts, I am an alcoholic.
What worries me is what you said: I just spent the last hour trying to figure out exactly how much I drink in a week and taking all those alcohol screening tests to see if they still say I drink too much. ugh. I know I have a "problem" with alcohol but I wonder if its really alcoholism or if maybe I'm just already nuts and I use alcohol as a crutch.
Are you trying to figure out if you can justify drinking again? Because I am reading that in your post. I do hope you won't.
Keep hanging in there. It will get better!
Hugs to you.
The first week I was a sad, tearful being, now past the first week, I am just feeling slightly irritated, but somewhat better. The beginning is hard and going to be hard, so plan for it.
I too drank about 30 drinks a week, but my last night drinking I had 12 drinks in a space of about 4 hours. No ifs, ans, or buts, I am an alcoholic.
What worries me is what you said: I just spent the last hour trying to figure out exactly how much I drink in a week and taking all those alcohol screening tests to see if they still say I drink too much. ugh. I know I have a "problem" with alcohol but I wonder if its really alcoholism or if maybe I'm just already nuts and I use alcohol as a crutch.
Are you trying to figure out if you can justify drinking again? Because I am reading that in your post. I do hope you won't.
Keep hanging in there. It will get better!
Hugs to you.
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,438
Early recovery is rough - but it won't always be like that erin 
I tried to look at it this way - I drank for years...I deserved to give sobriety the same chance...I bet you'll feel better about stuff at 2-3 months
I tried to look at it this way - I drank for years...I deserved to give sobriety the same chance...I bet you'll feel better about stuff at 2-3 months
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 819
When people say early recovery is rough, it is. But we also know that it does get better. My first week of sobriety was pure hell. Withdrawal, physical cravings, psychological cravings....your brain is learning to function again without alcohol. This takes time.
Scream, cry, eat a whole bag of chocolates...whatever it takes to get through these early days but stay sober. Once you get over the hump, you will feel so much better.
Scream, cry, eat a whole bag of chocolates...whatever it takes to get through these early days but stay sober. Once you get over the hump, you will feel so much better.
~sb
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: MD
Posts: 15,967
Keep moving forward!!!
if you are going to AA meetings, that is where we find a sponsor to guide us through the steps and a network of other people to support us. Get phone numbers and start talking to others, they can be a life line!
if you are going to AA meetings, that is where we find a sponsor to guide us through the steps and a network of other people to support us. Get phone numbers and start talking to others, they can be a life line!
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 267
It's so tough in the beginning, erin--especially the slow time crawl. But everybody's right. Nothing happens magically but it does get better. Waiting for it to get better is its own kind of torture but this work you're doing is going to pay off. Hang in there.
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