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Is it normal to be this confident, or am I going to get bamboozled?



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Is it normal to be this confident, or am I going to get bamboozled?

Old 09-18-2014, 05:07 AM
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Is it normal to be this confident, or am I going to get bamboozled?

It's early days of sobriety for me... 11 today. I've felt all kinds of crappy in that time (I've had good moments too, don't get me wrong). The one thing I haven't had is a single craving or even entertaining the thought of a drink.

This doesn't seem quite right to me. I'm wondering if the rug is going to be pulled out from under me when I least expect it. Is that the way of things? I guess I want to be on guard, but maybe I'm not because even though I feel lousy and I'm all over the place, drinking just doesn't seem an option anymore. Or maybe I am just truly done with it, I don't know.
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:14 AM
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Way too little info here to make any kind of assessment. Is this your first time putting the bottle down? Are you going to AA? Are you using another program? Are you doing anything other than just not drinking? If you drank like most of us here, just putting the bottle down usually doesn't last all that long. But who knows...

Congrats, by the way . Why don't ya tell us a bit more?
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:14 AM
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congrats on day 11 that's awesome!!!
I feel the same way. I'm at day 130 and have been blessed with very little cravings or nagging thoughts of drinking. I'm not sure why it has been (relatively) easy (ier) this time around??? Maybe my last stint in May scared the beejeebus outta me? I don't know. But I DO know that I am not letting my guard down. I know this damned thing can ambush me at any given moment, that's what it did in May. I didn't see it coming after 6 weeks of not drinking....I honestly don't even recall buying the wine that sent me on a tailspin and on my way to a DUI (2nd)...so I am aware that I could find myself facing a massive change anytime, with no warning. In the meantime, I will be grateful. But cautious. I do have the fleeting thoughts of "just one"....but they come and go pretty quickly.
Just listen to yourself. Pay attention. Be aware.
it's a sneaky bugger that gets off on catching us offguard.
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:15 AM
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11 days is pretty early. yeah...I don't want to wish bad things upon you, but the likelihood is you will be tested sometime, somewhere, and more than once.

It's fine to be confident - it's being over confident or complacent that is a danger.

As long as you remember that any idea that drinking is ok is a lie, you'll stay on the right side of fine Sick

D
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:18 AM
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FOR ME:

I am working toward a drink or away from one. I am not planning to drink....but am I planning NOT TO? That is where the work is.

I have not thought about drinking (as in go get a drink and drink it) for 5 years, but it is only because I take action DAILY, according to my sobriety PLAN, to NOT to.

Do you have a PLAN of action?
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:18 AM
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Sick - so happy to see you here still!!!!!!!!!!!!
Are you going to meetings or just toughing it out?
There are many different periods in the beginning of sobriety. While we share some with many people, each person's experience is different.
Still, don't let your guard down. Be grateful and thankful that the need is taken away from you, but be aware that a time may come when you need to remember that you don't want to go back there - ever.
Check in when you can!!!!
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:20 AM
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It can be up and down but just tell yourself the downs soon pass x
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:28 AM
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More info...

This is my first serious attempt at putting down the bottle. I'm 39 years old, been drinking for 25 years, seriously for the last ten. I didn't drink every night but probably 2-3 times during the week - a bottle of wine and 1-2 shots whiskey - and more on the weekend. I haven't been to a meeting yet. I was going to go to one last Tuesday but I chickened out. There is a women's AA meeting tomorrow night I am thinking of going to... partly because I'm going to be at a loose end now on my Friday night after work...

The consensus seems to be in favour of potential bamboozlement ahead! I shall consider myself warned. Thanks all.
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:33 AM
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RE planning, I've been ruminating about what to do about a bunch of upcoming weddings, hen's parties, etc etc. For one friend I have declined the hen's but I am attending the wedding. Its on 1 November and out of town. My friends are hiring a house and getting loose. I'm going to go and stay with my straight friend who has a kid and won't be partying. I'm telling some of these people that I've quit drinking (they know I have a problem) so my own pride will keep my accountable...

There's another wedding in town on the 4th October. Its reception only, the ceremony is just for family. Its the same group of people. I'm planning on going, making my appearance, wish the happy the newlyweds the best, have some food and get the feck out of there...
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Old 09-18-2014, 05:48 AM
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I agree that there's a good chance a situation will come along when you are confronted with a craving, but I'm glad things are going well so far.

Planning ahead for the wedding-related dates is a really good idea.
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Old 09-18-2014, 06:28 AM
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The cravings will come at some point. It's great that things are going well and you're feeling good.

But try to remember that when it comes to the disease/illness of alcoholism, over-confidence and arrogance are traits it thrives on, while, when confronted with humility and gratitude, alcoholism dies a slow death.
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Old 09-18-2014, 06:34 AM
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First time putting the bottle down ?
Best to get a solid Program working ASAP.
This can be harder than it sounds.
MM
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Old 09-18-2014, 06:44 AM
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I was pretty confident the first time around as well.

It didn't seem to hurt me.... at first.

It was when I got confident enough that I just stopped going to meetings, stopped posting on here, stopped thinking about "recovery" really at all that the trouble came.

Not long after that shift, I began feeling quite confident that I could drink in moderation.

Which resulted in a 1.5 year bender.

This time around, I am positive, I am hopeful, I am even - dare to say - confident.... but I am not willing to become complacent in my confidence. I read enough newcomer stories and reflect upon my own history just enough to keep an edge of uncertainty present. Just this side of confidence enough to be smart enough to remain wary.

Confidence is OK.... but take care that it is balanced with actual active effort and prudence.
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Old 09-18-2014, 07:01 AM
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Doubt in your ability to keep to this decision to save your own life is the same sort of critter as the craving itself - both are fighting for just another drink. To both of them I say FIE, aroint! Take off, eh?

I look at it like this. It is simply impossible for me to ever have a drink in my hand if I never doubt my ability to stay sober. It's the niggling maybes / whatifs that can erode my confidence and and my resolve along with it.

Overconfidence by definition is too much. Belief in self is never too much, that is what makes all change possible. Stick to your guns, SickOfThisCrap. Stick to your confidence in your ability to stay sober. Believe in yourself, you can do this! Onward!
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Old 09-18-2014, 07:22 AM
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You're an all pro corner back today. The wide receiver you have been guarding the entire game has been slow and seems to be limping. You've been all over him the whole game and he hasn't even been open to catch one pass.
Late in the fourth quarter with the game in hand you let your guard down a little.
Suddenly out of nowhere he sprints past you down the sideline and catches a 80 yard touchdown pass leaving you in the dust. Game over, you lost.
Was he sandbagging you the whole time? Maybe. Or maybe he just wanted it more than you at that moment.

Always be in the game. Never let your guard down. Be on top of your game always. And NEVER take a play "off".

I know it is an American football analogy. But I hope you get the point.
Don't get lulled into a false sense of security.
Congratulations on 11 days. You are still in training camp my friend.
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Old 09-18-2014, 07:57 AM
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I was sober about 4 months last year..and experienced probably only 4 cravings total (the last one I did not survive).

Glad to hear you are doing well...but yeah, emotions...life is not static and something may occur that overwhelms you or disturbs your peace that may make a drink sound like a good idea...feeling good might even make it feel that way.

I don't think you need to fret over this but you do only have to bear in mind that 11 days does not a life make.

And if that day comes...please post here first or call someone..
Do something different...
Don't go back to what you used to do ..and no longer want to.
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:02 AM
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At first I had a lot of those old drinking thoughts and feelings resurface but they passed in a few minutes and at almost a month they are almost gone. But, you NEVER know when triggers can pop up so I stay vigilant. Yesterday I was at the Dollar Store. While checking out the girl said "can I interest you in some wine and chocolate?"...they were on there on the counter. For a $1.00 ?? Wine coolers! I just laughed and thought, what a dirty trick!
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:16 AM
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Keep pushing forward, but built up those Sober muscles, because there will be a time when life will throw a few curve balls, dealing with stress, relationship issues etc etc

Also there will be invites to birthdays, weddings, what about this Xmas or New Years!!

Build that solid foundation when the waters are calm, in preparation for the many potential storms that can surface in the future!!
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:24 AM
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I heard those hen parties can be pretty fowl. Good plan for your upcoming events. Temptation will present itself and your mind will start to rationalize what harm could possibly come from one drink? That's where you need to remain strong. I haven't had many cravings but when I do they are powerful. Last night I was channel surfing and I came across a show where the host was making a cocktail. I watched for no more than a minute and my mouth started watering like a waterfall. I changed the channel and the craving subsided.
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Old 09-18-2014, 11:30 AM
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Originally Posted by sickofthiscrap View Post
I'm wondering if the rug is going to be pulled out from under me when I least expect it.
I wouldn't say that any of my urges have been a complete surprise, or felt like the rug being pulled out from under me. I expected them to happen, and they did. It's part of being an addict. Addiction doesn't just go away. You can just put down the drink, and some do it successfully and never pick up again. However, most do pick up again. (Those are the stats and in no way a prediction)

I think it's very important to realize than an urge is almost guaranteed to come to you at some point. Whether it's an image, a smell, a taste, a memory... it's likely to pop up at some point, seemingly spontaneously.

I have found a bit of peace in knowing (1) the urge will happen, (2) it's nothing more than a passing urge... and it usually passes within minutes for me, (3) I don't have to fear the urge, and (4) being mindful during an urge is the key for me to successfully navigate them.

Good luck
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