PolarBlue

Well, it's indeed a new low. I've never been through treatment and could use some advice.

What should I do now? Is AA considered the most solid treatment program?

I think I will need treatment. Not only for my health but to find another job. I've been drinking pretty much every day for over 15 years. I did stop briefly a few times, once for 5 weeks, but then got right back into it.

Also, what about my next job application? This is important so I don't become homeless. Should I just be honest with the reason of termination from my previous job? I don't qualify for unemployment due to the circumstances and I'll lose my house if I don't find a decent paying job asap. I'm hoping if I'm honest and say I'm in treatment or have been through treatment they won't hold it against me. But I know it would still make them consider me a risk.

I'm just lost right now.

Coldfusion

Welcome Polar Blue,

I would say as little as possible to any potential employers about reasons for termination and alcoholism.

AA is a great program of recovery, but it is very different from an in-patient "treatment" program. It would be against the traditions of AA to tell an employer you go to AA meetings.

bigsombrero

Worried about job applications already? Don't put the cart before the horse. Get sober. I myself went to inpatient treatment at an affordable center in the city. Shared dorm rooms, breakfast, lunch and dinner, class meetings, the whole nine yards. Others here got sober going to AA. Others here got sober with this website, SR. Others used programs like Rational Recovery.

It doesn't matter about the job right now. Start exploring ways that you can get on track here. If there's ever a time to stop and focus on the "right here, right now", this is it. We're here to help you and support you, but I hope you make a decision to quit drinking and put all the options on the table. The jig's up. Stop the denial. We've been there, and are able to help. All the best to you as you start down this positive new path!

least

Welcome! AA is not considered "treatment". It's a fellowship of people with a common goal: to get and stay sober.

And no, I would not divulge the details of your being fired. It can be used against you. Don't give them ammo to use against you.

PolarBlue

Thanks for the advice. Yes, I agree getting sober is long overdue and needs to come now. I haven't had a drink in 4 days which isn't that long of a stretch I know. But for a daily drinker it's a start.

But I also am concerned that my bills also won't pay themselves, and that's stressing me out making me want to go get a drink. I do have 401k coming soon in but it will only last about 3 or 4 months. Maybe, if I really pinch my pennies. Just the thought of treatment and finding a job and having my house by the time all is said and done seems like a lot. I'm sure they'll ask why I was terminated from my last job.

Yes, I shouldn't be thinking about that right now. Sober head is spinning. Sorry for the rant.

esinger

I would like to tell you to be honest but being a former manager for many years and a hypocrite I have to tell you that that would be a mistake. Dealing with employees substance abuse is very frustrating when you are the boss as they tend to be absent a lot and unproductive. You would like to think that they will look at the positive things you have done to correct the problem but all they can think is what happens when they slip. I'm not suggesting you lie but I'd do my best to be vague. I have had a lot of first hand experience with this. I currently have a boss in recovery so I'm kind of lucky in that aspect.
As for treatment, do your research, check the reviews (and not on the treatment centers website). I jumped too quick and although it was comical it wasn't very helpful. and very expensive. AA is good for some but not for everyone. It is easy to find meetings and you will have someone to talk to. I am no longer part of the program but that was my preference. Good luck and try not to let things overwhelm you. All you can do is go forward.

sugarbear1

IF, you have an open mind, IF you are willing to go to any lengths to stay stopped and live a beautiful life, work those 12 steps as soon as possible if you get to AA (find someone to sponsor you which means they have worked the 12 steps and have had a spiritual awakening as a result of working those steps)....

There are other methods available, too. Each of these have their own websites:

Rational Recovery
AVRT
SMART
Life Ring
Women for Sobriety
SOS

I wish you well on staying stopped!

Soberwolf

Nice to meet you

PolarBlue

When you were a manager, did you usually request the reason for termination? I know I could probably say I'd rather not disclose it, but that would send up a red flag. I would also be hesitant to hire someone who got fired for something like this even if they went through treatment. And people do lie on applications. But if the lie is discovered down the road you're screwed.

I'll have to look into local programs. Hopefully they're not extremely expensive.

Cecilia44

I agree with bigsombero, you might be getting a bit ahead of yourself. I think getting and staying sober for a little while at least would help. When you do get around for apply for job, I don't think I would be overly honest. I agree, it could be held against you.

AA is not a treatment program ... but it has helped many and it is free. Why not give it a try and see how you like it?

Hugs to you.

leah333

4 days is huge!!!! Many times 4 hours is huge. And considering you will have financial means to stay afloat for a few months with no income, that is all the more reason for you to seek the treatment you feel you need now. We're all here for you

PolarBlue

Thanks. I've considered AA before. I'll have to weigh my local options...I'm in a rural area but I'm sure there's something close. Just trying to get myself together this week and let it all soak in.

I know I have a little time before I absolutely need another job, but just to put that at rest for now, how would I be vague about it? I've been trying to think of ways that don't sound like totally evading the issue.

I think I'm still in a bit of denial over everything. This slapped me in the face pretty hard. I know I haven't reached rock bottom yet. Just don't want to end up on the street and get hooked on something else.

esinger

I didn't always ask but it is common. I got burned big by one employee that I rehired after he said he had done everything to clean up his act and it never happened again.
I've had people be honest with me in the interview and I just couldn't look past it and in the mean time I was drinking a fifth a night.
My common line would be the job wasn't a good fit or I didn't meet their expectations but let me tell you why I could be an asset in this position.
It's tough. I left a great paying job I hated and drank for almost a year and a half taking temp jobs. Having a big hole in my resume and trying to explain it didn't help at all.
I was in the depth of hell ! I finally decided that I had to get sober before I could move on broke or not. Four months after I got out of treatment I said to myself "Screw money! What do I like to do". I like working with my hands and enjoy people. I took a lousy paying job as the maintenance guy at a senior home and I love it. Now I had to downsize and make adjustments but my health and happiness are more important.
Get sober first. Then decide what will make you happy and pursue it. It ain't easy but you are worth it.
That's my two cents. Good luck!

sugarbear1

early recovery.....

I strongly suggest you focus on the moment in front of you, not the future, not just yet.

Your answer will come to you as you get more sober!

Coldfusion

I found my current job through someone at an AA meeting. Recovered alcoholics are very good employees.

PolarBlue

I agree. I do have to get more sober before thinking about future decisions. My head's still foggy from the last time I drank 4 days ago. Which was way too much.

I realize things aren't going to be easy. Not for quite a while. The anxiety of not drinking and thinking about recent events is unreal, especially when no one's around. Glad to find this place though.

leah333

Simply say the job was no longer a good fit for you and that you're excited for a change and the challenges it will bring.

PolarBlue

As long as they don't asked why I was fired for that. I think anything is better than saying it was for being drunk on the job. I've been thinking about a move across country where I have a roommate waiting. Just say I relocated. My current job can't tell anyone why I was terminated.

Just need to relax and get myself straight. Thanks for all the advice.

MariahGayle

Glad you are here PolarBlue - I think the advice to take this time to focus on your sobriety is really good advice.

I live in a fairly small town & after my DUI over a year & a half ago, I felt that there wasn't a chance of me ever finding employment (I lost my job due to the DUI, as transporting clients was a part of my job) I saw an advertisement for a job one day that I was perfectly qualified for & decided the worst that could happen was that they wouldn't call me. I walked into the office with my resume & was greeted by a lady I knew from a previous office I had worked in. I gave her my resume & told her about my recent DUI, that I was in treatment & that I hoped for an opportunity to interview for the job. They did call me for an interview & they did hire me for the position & are my current employers. People are really very understanding & supportive if they know that you are working to make a change. Take care of you!!

LBrain

sorry to hear of your mishap polarblue, a lot of good replies from the crew here. I can't add anything other than to wish you good luck. A similar thing happened to me as well.