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Old 09-16-2014, 10:48 AM   #1 (permalink)
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HUUUGE panic attack


Went to the docs today to talk to him about my hospital results! MASSIVE panic attack in the waiting room!! My friend was with me and stopped me from running outta the place, I was terrified because I knew he was goona talk to me about my enzyme results!

Well THANKFULLY I don't deserve this but my enzymes are only SLIGHTLY raised, he said my liver is slightly stressed and its not too late to stop drinking. He said my liver will heal back to 100%normal in no time at all!

Ive been convinced for about one month after that hospital visit that I have liver disease, losing sleep etc!

Just venting and expressing here gang! Had to get it off my chest! Emotionally drained right now tho!
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Old 09-16-2014, 10:56 AM   #2 (permalink)
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That's positive news Chilled!!
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Old 09-16-2014, 10:59 AM   #3 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by Purpleknight View Post
That's positive news Chilled!!
Its a huge relief mate, im still not sober tho sadly, a few days here a few days there but its not enough. Not looking for advice just being honest.

Been given beta blockers to slow my heart rate down aswell so I KNOW I cant drink on them ( I havnt taken any yet and I wouldn't ever whilst still struggling with the addiction )

He said its not too late to quit, Cant even say how grateful I am for that but I am well aware if I keep going it WILL be too late!

Anyways just expressing here, getting it off my chest
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:27 AM   #4 (permalink)
What's the world coming to when you can't trust an recovering alcoholic ex degenerate gambler huh ?
 
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Glad it was good news !
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:30 AM   #5 (permalink)
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Glad it was good news !
The dr at the hospital ( who was about 25 ) made me believe I was dying of liver disease! I am grateful tho trust me!
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:32 AM   #6 (permalink)
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Its hard to think you have some disease and are convinced of it, and say ok thats it, I am done because I have this. Then you find out you dont, and its like, well heck I dont have it so I'll go back to my ways... And you know its the wrong thing to do, but you still do it because you are no longer scared. I try and keep myself scared, and tell myself that eventually my luck will run out if I keep this up.
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:33 AM   #7 (permalink)
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Its hard to think you have some disease and are convinced of it, and say ok thats it, I am done because I have this. Then you find out you dont, and its like, well heck I dont have it so I'll go back to my ways... And you know its the wrong thing to do, but you still do it because you are no longer scared. I try and keep myself scared, and tell myself that eventually my luck will run out if I keep this up.
That's the truth right there, cant disagree with you!
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:36 AM   #8 (permalink)
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That's the truth right there, cant disagree with you!
So what is the reason why you want to stop? What is the biggest reason? Mine is my kids and family! So I keep a picture of them (my favorite ones) around in different places. Then when I think, hey I'll just have one, I go find a picture and look at it. And I scare myself into thinking about what life would be like without them, or worse, if I die, and they have to live without me! And the pain that they will have to deal with, and the sorrow, and the way life will be without a person in that family...

And that usually works for me recently.
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Old 09-16-2014, 11:47 AM   #9 (permalink)
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So what is the reason why you want to stop? What is the biggest reason? Mine is my kids and family! So I keep a picture of them (my favorite ones) around in different places. Then when I think, hey I'll just have one, I go find a picture and look at it. And I scare myself into thinking about what life would be like without them, or worse, if I die, and they have to live without me! And the pain that they will have to deal with, and the sorrow, and the way life will be without a person in that family...

And that usually works for me recently.
For me, I guess it is my self respect, I wanna get fit and healthy again and I just know il die if I DO carry on. but also I hate the feeling of slavery to addiction and somehow I have not yet fallen out of love with it.
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Old 09-16-2014, 02:45 PM   #10 (permalink)
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glad your results were better than you feared

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Old 09-16-2014, 03:09 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Great news, now you can sleep on both ears.
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Old 09-16-2014, 05:15 PM   #12 (permalink)
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I am well aware if I keep going it WILL be too late!
Look at these words you wrote. Consider this a near miss and take the steps to avoid the inevitable. You CAN stop and get your health back and have a long productive life... here is your chance.

Be strong, be well and move forward w/o regret. A good life is waiting, don't let it slip away.....
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Old 09-16-2014, 05:27 PM   #13 (permalink)
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Chilledice, I have just made it to day 6 and I am feeling better every day. I, literally, had NO IDEA how much different I would feel without the alcohol. I'm still terrified that I will drink again. I, also, have been so scared of ruining my liver and my health. My blood pressure is way up and I have to have a complete knee replacement in November so I NEED to stay with this program. I get online every evening and just search around for people to read about or chat with just to stay strong. You can do it and you DESERVE it!
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Old 09-16-2014, 05:32 PM   #14 (permalink)
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That's great news, Chilledice.
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Old 09-16-2014, 05:52 PM   #15 (permalink)
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That's great news!!!
Let's celebrate by staying sober forever.
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Old 09-16-2014, 10:37 PM   #16 (permalink)
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I'm glad the tests came back okay, Chilledice. But remember you've kind of been in this position before. If you don't quit drinking for good eventually you will reach a point where you're going to have some issues. I realize it's not easy to quit (I drank hard for 25 years!) but somehow you have to figure out some approach that will work for you.

Does your doctor have any suggestions?
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Old 09-17-2014, 12:12 AM   #17 (permalink)
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if I keep going it WILL be too late!
If doc had said your liver is severly diseased and the next drink might cause you're liver to explode and kill you...
What would you do...what would you do....today?
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Old 09-17-2014, 12:21 AM   #18 (permalink)
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Glad to hear the results were better than expected, but as you said, it won't always be this way if you keep going.
YOu can do this, we are all behind you.
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Old 09-17-2014, 01:43 PM   #19 (permalink)
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If doc had said your liver is severly diseased and the next drink might cause you're liver to explode and kill you...
What would you do...what would you do....today?
Sorry for the delay in posting.

I know I wouldn't take the next drink but not sure HOW I wouldn't take the next drink if that makes sense?

Im doing much ''better '' than I was but still not sober entirely, I am not looking for advice here just expressing and replying to the replies
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Old 09-17-2014, 01:44 PM   #20 (permalink)
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What an amazing feeling that is =) Like you've been given a second chance, and you have, in a way. Make the most of it.
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