In the heart of the beast
In the heart of the beast
Well well with much reluctance, and obstinateg, I am going to have to throw myself into the heart of the beast, the casino. My family needs this money and my best friend is offering me a job that despite my reluctance I need to take.
So that being said, I need help from my extended family SR. My plan is to apply for the job in the morning, my friend will talk to the district manager, by the afternoon I will have the job most likely.
I need to, if I get this job, show up work as a ticket writer in the sports book and leave. This is one of those life situations where I am doing this purely to help my family and nothing more. I don't want to do this, this might be stupid, but without my other job, I am casting myself into the heart of temptation.
Wish me luck, I am going to do this, I am sober and going to protect my sobriety, I honestly feel bad that I am going to feeding other peoples addictions by taking bets, but I also know they make their own decisions. Sheesh this is a awful spot I am in, but only if I don't stay sober. Otherwise, thiis is still an opportunity. Wish me luck, going to try for the job, most likely get it, and then into the heart of the beast of addiction. Good day friends wish you all well.
So that being said, I need help from my extended family SR. My plan is to apply for the job in the morning, my friend will talk to the district manager, by the afternoon I will have the job most likely.
I need to, if I get this job, show up work as a ticket writer in the sports book and leave. This is one of those life situations where I am doing this purely to help my family and nothing more. I don't want to do this, this might be stupid, but without my other job, I am casting myself into the heart of temptation.
Wish me luck, I am going to do this, I am sober and going to protect my sobriety, I honestly feel bad that I am going to feeding other peoples addictions by taking bets, but I also know they make their own decisions. Sheesh this is a awful spot I am in, but only if I don't stay sober. Otherwise, thiis is still an opportunity. Wish me luck, going to try for the job, most likely get it, and then into the heart of the beast of addiction. Good day friends wish you all well.
I'll be honest Jeremy I don;t think this is a good fit for you at all.
I understand the need you feel to provide for your family, but I think a little time picking up some part time stuff would have been all round better for you even with less money.
But I also know you well enough to know the decision is a done deal.
I wish you the best
D
I understand the need you feel to provide for your family, but I think a little time picking up some part time stuff would have been all round better for you even with less money.
But I also know you well enough to know the decision is a done deal.
I wish you the best
D
I'm going to share my experience with you here, if you don't mind... I too, thought I could do it. I was a dancer who went sober and continued dancing, thinking that I'd be fine, so long as I didn't drink. [I stayed in the industry because I needed the money and had no other resources. I told myself I HAD to continue in that line of work] And I was fine ... for a little while. But inevitably I crumbled. No amount of "I'm better than this" or "better than thou" attitude could help; I was swimming in temptation - literally the deep end of temptation - while still incredibly fresh and new to sobriety. And when it was fresh and new and novel, I did alright. But eventually the newness wears off, and the temptation - well, it's still there.
The old shoes are the comfiest, right? If you're determined to never wear a pair of old shoes again, do you keep them in your closet? The new ones are shiny and pretty, you like them so much and you know they'll do you well, long term. But they're just - not the old shoes. And one day your feet will hurt, and you may have a blister from breaking them in - and you'll think, ach, what's one more day in my old shoes? ... and you'll give in, because you kept those old shoes around. If you didn't have the ready access to them, you'd be able to keep wearing the newer, better shoes through the break-in period.
I went back to my old shoes. And they treated me the same as they always did, slipping and sliding where they shouldn't, making me trip and fall, no matter how comfy they were. I fell flat on my face drinking again ... and I would wager to bet (perhaps pun intended, for you? ) that if I hadn't exposed myself so blatantly to all that temptation, that I wouldn't have had that freakishly awful and embarrassing landslide off the bandwagon of recovery.
Just my .02 ...
Last edited by roguedreams; 09-11-2014 at 10:55 PM. Reason: added info
The old shoes are the comfiest, right? If you're determined to never wear a pair of old shoes again, do you keep them in your closet? The new ones are shiny and pretty, you like them so much and you know they'll do you well, long term. But they're just - not the old shoes. And one day your feet will hurt, and you may have a blister from breaking them in - and you'll think, ach, what's one more day in my old shoes? ... and you'll give in, because you kept those old shoes around. If you didn't have the ready access to them, you'd be able to keep wearing the newer, better shoes through the break-in period.
Jeremy, I know very well the struggle of trying to provide for your family and the stress and pressure that it causes. That said, this does not sound like a good idea. You will have easy, ready access to several of your addictions.
Do I recall correctly that the other day you posted that your wife had a new job? I know it is difficult and money will probably be tight, but can you made due on that for a while while you give yourself time to look for better work?
Best of luck whatever you decide.
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
If this job means being able to put food on the table then great move.
Only you know what's best, if you think going at the center of a Volcano to light up a cigarette is what you need I can only respect that.
I hope you continue your job search and use this job as a buffer until something better pops.
Only you know what's best, if you think going at the center of a Volcano to light up a cigarette is what you need I can only respect that.
I hope you continue your job search and use this job as a buffer until something better pops.
I don't know if it's a good idea but I can't fault you for trying. I know firsthand how it feels to be out of work for awhile. Maybe ten years ago I lost my job; I was angry about it but not concerned since I had quite a bit of cash built up. In fact I took the entire summer off. Figured I deserved it. I didn't even consider finding a job for almost five months. By then a bad attitude settled over me, and I think it showed because I got no bites for a long time. After a couple months of not even getting call backs I was getting a bit worried. The bar for the level of jobs I would apply for and consider was starting to get lower and lower. Eventually I got that first job again and quickly worked my way back up to the point I was before.
You have to do what you have to do, but be careful. Watch your sobriety like a hawk and keep looking for a job that suits you better.
You have to do what you have to do, but be careful. Watch your sobriety like a hawk and keep looking for a job that suits you better.
Hi Jeremy your stressed and pushed for time
Jeremy there must be other work surely dee is more than right
base it on this if your stressed and confused do you seriously think youl 'be ok'
Sorry jeremy its way too risky
just calm down and logically think this over in the meantime apply for any other work
Jeremy there must be other work surely dee is more than right
base it on this if your stressed and confused do you seriously think youl 'be ok'
Sorry jeremy its way too risky
just calm down and logically think this over in the meantime apply for any other work
It's possible for you to take this job and remain sober, but it is going to take extraordinary effort on your part to resist that temptation day after day. You might be taking this job for your family, but don't give yourself away in the process. Good luck!
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