Nonsensical

Myself and a few others talk about making a plan quite often. I remember, though, that planning isn't as easy as it sounds in early sobriety. Not for all of us anyway. The brain can be a little foggy, and some people are naturally better at planning than others. Regardless, we all have some capacity for it.

I made a diagram below that I think sums up the plans you can make. You can plan for your triggers or you can plan for your addiction. When diagrammed I think it looks obvious that planning for your addiction looks much simpler. In the long run it is. In the short run, though, it can be easier to have multiple simpler plans for your triggers. If you stay sober you will eventually find that one plan - personalized for you - will take care of your addiction at the root, and you won't need to plan around all of your triggers.

I find planning ahead is empowering. I was a slave to my addiction for 25 years. There was a constant battle running in my head every day, and I rarely won it. I would quit drinking and ardently hope that battle wouldn't come back, but it always did. It is the nature of addiction. Having a plan put me on offense. Instead of reacting in fear when the boogieman showed up I was mentally and emotionally primed for the engagement.

I heartily recommend planning to all newcomers. Start small and work your way up. If you are stuck for ideas - ASK! There is a lot of help available here on SR. Don't be shy about using it!

You can do this.

JasonNorth

My plan as it stands today is to abstain from drinking for 100 days. That would be the longest in my whole life since i first drank at about 14 (30 years ago). That takes me to the date of the work christmas party (which I organise for 300 people). I plan to drink then.

in January, i have 6 weeks before a big holiday to Australia. again I plan to abstain for 6 weeks before australia.

Am I being nieve?

It's very easy to read here everybodies first hand experience & warnings. But I haven't myself actually stepped out of drinking for any meaningful time & really evaluated it, tested it, pushed it, abstained from it, learned the lessons from it. come to the conclusions of what it is or what it insn't for me.

I know it's been a problem, as in i can drink 11 straight months every day despite me promising myself i'll have a day off. I get drawn into the pub by seemingly invisible forces.

But I do feel differently this time & this is due to this site in helping me evaluatie alcohol & sharing my issues with it. thinking of alcohol in a very different way.

Is this just how newbies feel after 10 days? I still think i can can keep this monster in a box & let him out when i decide.

Perhaps I'm a nieve Newbie. But i need to learn the lessons myself. you were all newbies once.

anattaboy

Jason, I hope sometime in the next 90 days you can take the time to re-read this post. If your binges last 11 months typically, was the January spree a plan for 2016?

MIRecovery

Even if you accomplish your plan I do not see any solution to the problem

GracieLou

I am not sure if planning for something to happen that may not happen would have been right for me.

It would have felt like I was borrowing trouble were their was none. "Never trouble trouble unless trouble troubles you".

I can accumulate tools and support along the way and use them if needed but I didn't have to glare at them everyday as though my addiction is lying in wait to attack.

It can attack out of the blue but then I grab my tools and support. I didn't plan for the attack to happen.

I do understand triggers though and I used HALT most of the time. Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired were the four reasons that, for me, were used to identify what I wad feeling. Once I identified them, then I could talk them out and see them for what they really were.

anattaboy

My mistake--It's 6 weeks FROM Jan. so that makes it Feb/Mar for the trip in 2016. Good plan giving yourself 3 months to fit 6 weeks of sobriety into.

JasonNorth

The trip is 2015. Next year.

sprout50

It sounds like your addictive voice has this elaborate plan for when you can drink again. I used to do that too. Quit, think I could control it and end up back where I started drinking every single day again.

Sometimes we do have to learn the hard lesson for ourselves but if I could, i would spare anyone from having it go that far. Keep evaluating and keep reading and posting here.

letitgo

Great post Nonsensical. Really puts everything in perspective.

PurpleKnight

Yeap Non is talking a lot of sense!!

My mind would sell everything on the right as an excuse/justification to drink, "oh well, X happened today, I'll be Sober tomorrow" or "I can't deal with X without alcohol"!!

The reality is the list on the right WILL happen in some form, sobriety doesn't create a perfect life, it simply cuts out alcohol from the rollercoaster of life, which will still have it's ups and downs!!

For me having support was and still is crucial to the whole equation!!

FreeOwl

Yes

FreeOwl

actually... no... you're not being nieve. you're being Naive.

And addicted.



as to the OP - I like it but I have a more streamlined diagram...


I have an addiction to alcohol ------>>> LIFE is a trigger -------->>> PLAN MY RESPONSE

Soberwolf

basically be aware in early sobriety esp that you must consider everything is it a risk and in mid to long term sobriety too !!!

you can write it down or just keep it in the head as long as you factor it in

i know im alcoholic i am not scared by not drinking something truly happened for me when i got sober

nothing in the world can make me drink but i still factor it in and on my first real attempt in sobriety im 4 days away from 14 mnths sober so its a very useful tool in my sobriety armory

sobriety batbelt tools are important

hokey

Thank you Non for that great post! It seemed so hard to define a plan at first, but the longer I worked at staying sober and the more I read and listened and learned, the easier it became to realize that I did indeed have one. At first it was one day at a time, that helped for a long time and still does some days. That's what kept me sober ... but I had to have a plan if I really wanted to live happily sober. The chart you posted is a great way for people to start making their own plan, so again, thanks! Oh and you forgot to mention .... BACON!

FreeOwl

BACON!!!!

This is a fantastic plan.....

Nonsensical

Seems like the plan at the left to me. Was that your plan from day 1 or did you evolve to that after a period of sobriety? There are some among us who went straight to that overall plan, but I think most of us had to evolve to that. I know I did. I'm pretty sure I'm still evolving.

Mmmmmmm....bacon!

anattaboy

Good point Non. The past 90 days have been "I don't drink" for me and all is well in that dept. but now some other things need my attention like lotsa debt, finding work, hitting the treadmill+ at least once a day and of course the family. As a stay-at-home Dad to a 3.75 yr old I am fortunate but I would like her to have more social interaction via preschool and that will require me to work--no plan and daunting as I am a felon and won't see a DL till 2024 and other than being a decent carpenter, have no skills. That is all I'm going to tackle in the next year. Funny, I was just commenting to MIL on phone on how this site is saturated with "Do you have a plan?" and how helpful I've found it.

FreeOwl

Took me a couple years to get to this point.... and yes, still evolving.

doggonecarl

That's your plan at ten days sober...to not drink for 100. But since you plan to drink, you probably will, well before 100 days. I know I would look for reasons to start early.

JasonNorth

Thanks for highlighting my incorrect spelling of the word naive perhaps next time highlight it in red? & thanks for your constructive response.