Day One
 

It is day one for me and I have no confidence that I will be able to get sober. I have tried before, but I continue to fail. I really want to get sober, I just need to find the ability to commit. I am a 54 year old single women and I used to be able to commit to so many great things: running, school, work, hobbies...but I am not able to do it anymore. I need to find the will, the strength, the support and the reason. I really hate myself.

The thing is, drinking is like being a mouse on a wheel. Just going in circles with nothing really changing, well, maybe that's not true as I guess things slowly get worse but my point is there is no really good productive change. You can't achieve your goals. Deciding between drinking and not drinking is simply deciding do you like the way things are or are you ready for change. I wanted the change. I wanted to be a better person.

hi and welcome birddog :)

I think everyone fears that may not have what it takes to make it...I know I did. What I did was break it down...all I, or anyone, has to do is stay sober today. 24 hours. Then back it up and make the same commitment again.

why not join our 24 hour recovery connections thread - it's a great fun way to make that daily commitment? :)

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...t-12-a-16.html

D

Yes, I want change. I want to be a better person. I want to enjoy everyday and not have plan my life around hangovers. I actually do that. I cancelled on two friends today. They don't drink and they are able to enjoy each and every day (even when life throws bad stuff at them). But I stayed in bed all day. I don't want that anymore. I want to change.
Thank you!

Thank you, Dee. I will do that now.

Welcome birddog - it's great to meet you!

I felt the same as you when I first came here. I was older too - and couldn't imagine my life without alcohol. I don't know why I clung to it though - it was no longer fun or relaxing, just something I did automatically. It was bringing me nothing but pain and misery. When I joined SR I felt instantly lighter and more hopeful - I was no longer alone. We know you can get free of it. Glad you are here. :)

Good luck birddog !

Oh and nice to meet you

Hey, birddog. Coming here and posting is a great first step!

You can do it. Ive felt just like you. All of those things you love will come back with sobriety. Alcohol makes you a bystander in you own life. I always remember people having fun enjoying themselves and thinking i used to do that.

Thank you for the replies. I do feel lighter. Tonymblue, I just got back from walking my dog and while I was walking her I thought about my friends who don't drink and I thought "wow, they participate in life". I want to participate, I don't want to standby.

I just read a quote that someone posted about dogs. My dog was so good to me today. I had a hard time getting up and she was so patient with me. She is such a good friend. I love her so much.

Birddog - welcome. And there is no such thing as continuing to fail. Each time we hit a bump, we must learn, and look at it as a lesson. What to not do in the future. Don't look at it as "failure". I wish I could remember who here at SR told me this, but it's words to live by.

“Setbacks can be stimulators to deeper insights and even more progress.”

The goal is to stay sober. But, progress is better than living in the past and beating yourself up over the setbacks. Learn from them - every single time. I believe most of those with great success here, have also had their share of setbacks. And they are okay with telling us that they too, struggled. They are proof that you cannot give up. When you throw in the towel is when you fail. It's not when you have a bump, or a "setback".

The key is being honest and not being afraid to come here and say you drank, you caved, you fell. However you want to put it - but never fail. I've been on and off again so much I'm losing track. But, I keep telling myself to keep learning, keep finding new ways, keep listening to others. And never ever give up. Don't take offense to suggestions from others - they want the same thing you do - for you to be sober.

Be well - I and all of us here wish you the best in your journey of sobriety!

I have a jack Russell who kinda thinks he's human a few episodes if you will...

We got given a near brand new recliner chair I covered it with sheets it was no use unless I took that chair upstairs he wasn't giving up I can't believe I'm writing this that new chair is now his bed

When he was getting toilet trained outside he came home within 5mins in the toilet relieved himself right beside the toilet like if he was tall enough he would of aimed for the toilet itself like we do

My dog tries to do some funny sort of speaking

I don't know what I would do without that dog there is an album on my profile where you can see him if you like

You are certainly capable of sobriety. Millions have been in your exact situation and have quit, so don't feel helpless. You can start a whole new life with one decision.

Hello BD! Welcome! Remember and nurture that wonderful life affirming side of you. It's bigger than you can imagine!

Welcome to the Forum!! :wave:

I love the stories about your Jack Russel, Soberworlf. I just got back from the park with my dog. We spent two hours there. She is now resting comfortably by the AC vent. I really owed her.

Marjoram, thank you for such great and inspirational words. I am so happy to have found people like you to lift me up and carry me with your words. Many, many thanks.