Soberwolf

Hi Avice glad it went well sounds like a good friend and yeah maybe he researched cos he cares getting rid of alcohol etc but its when u said he can have 2 drinks and stop you said 'I wish' avice u know alcohol is slowly destroying u and that thought 'I wish' kinda has to stop its not healthy i say this sincerely as a friend who cares

Sounds like you need a plan to beat this what is your plan ? and have you stayed sober ?

If so how long are you sober now ?

whalebelow

The guy pursuing you wants to "rescue " you....... Why?

Rescuers seek out people who need rescuing.

Why does he think you need rescuing?

My guess is he can see what you cannot.

You are killing yourself to live.

That probably sounds very OTT, but just give it some thought.

Avice

Flynbuy. I really didn't mean any offense. Your advice is welcome anytime, OK?
soberwolf. In terms of a plan - I've signed up for this board. I've also made my healthy diet chart for the week, but that isn't working out as well as I'd hoped. I'm used to eating one meal a day, and if I try to eat any more I get sick.
whalebelow. Yes, this guy is trying to rescue me. He's not the first one. Since I moved to a new city (4 months ago), I've had a few people point out my alcohol problem. It's pretty obvious by now.

whalebelow

I have a female friend just like you.

I tried to help but she didn't want it.

I was sober two years then, but I picked up again and we have lost touch.

I think about her from time to time.

I'm a big guy and people tend not to mess with me when I'm good and drunk.

She was petite and very attractive, the drinker she got the more "attention " she got.

God, I hate hate to think of some of the situations she has ended up in.

MelindaFlowers

Avice,

Are you still going to try the moderation plan that you talked about a few posts back?

Avice

whalebelow. I got a lot of attention at bars as well. As for the kinds of situations I put myself in - you don't ever want to know. I willingly put myself in danger so many times that I started to wonder whether I had some kind of serious death wish.
MelindaFlowers. The moderation went according to plan. The next couple days did not. I think that the 2 days I gave myself for moderation are over and done with. In a nutshell...no. Time for sobriety now.

whalebelow

First drink triggers the physical craving.


No first drink, no physical craving.

After that, the problem is mental.

In other words your mind starts saying "it wasn't too bad, just one drink.. It'll be different this time."
Or "my god, anyone who had just had such a bad day thoroughly deserves one drink, it'll be different this time"

It's a strange thing because if you burn yourself on a stove, you'll never think of deliberately touching it again and thinking you won't get burnt again.

MelindaFlowers

I'm glad to hear it Avice! I found trying to moderate was much more stressful than just not drinking. It's taken me awhile to be okay with this, but it's kind of a relief not to drink. The planning and negotiating is over. It's tough but pretty simple. I like that the drinking part of it only has one rule: no alcohol. That's a plan we can stick with. Please keep us posted on how you are doing. I am rooting for you!