Day #1 - Hi
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: sydney
Posts: 9
Day #1 - Hi
Hi All,
Little bit nervous as this is my first time posting.. however here it goes..
I'm 24 living in Sydney and have a been a recreational drug user since the age of 16.
It all started with heavy drinking from a young age.. Friday nights with friends etc I'm sure most of you are accustomed to this..!
I began using marijuana when i was 16 and smoked at least 4-5 times a week until the age of 21. During this time i also used ecstasy fairly heavily on the weekends (usually 5-10 pills on a friday or saturday night)
I got over marijuana and Ecstasy and moved onto Cocaine which i have been using almost every weekend for the last 3 years.
Long story short, i used to be able to handle the comedowns and "scatness" fairly well... til i had my first panic attack on a sunday night about a year or two ago.
Since then my life has changed dramatically. Anxiety has been the scariest thing i've ever experienced and i would not wish this on my worst enemy.
I thought i was going crazy and i was going to be admitted to a psych ward with schizophrenia etc etc (pretty common symptoms of anxiety)
I sought help and was prescribed lexapro. This really helped me come to grips with my anxiety as it kept me calm as i studied as much as i could about my GAD
I came off lexapro after 6 months and stayed clean from drugs for about a year
Recently (the last 6 months or so) i have slipped back into the habit of recreational drug use along with binge drinking. Drug use is rampant amongst my group of friends and it is very hard to avoid.
My binges have come back with a vengeance, worse than before. They would start on a friday night and not finish well into sunday.
Sorry for the long boring post... almost finished
This weekend i had a binge which consisted of Cocaine, alcohol, MDMA, Ecstasy & Benzos.
Last night i had the worst panic attack i have ever had and almost admitted myself to hospital.
I battled through it and saw my therapist today. We have agreed that if i do this to myself again i will be checked into Rehab.
This was the biggest wake up call of my life.
So here i am... Day 1.
Hoping to find support from other likeminded individuals..!!
thanks
Little bit nervous as this is my first time posting.. however here it goes..
I'm 24 living in Sydney and have a been a recreational drug user since the age of 16.
It all started with heavy drinking from a young age.. Friday nights with friends etc I'm sure most of you are accustomed to this..!
I began using marijuana when i was 16 and smoked at least 4-5 times a week until the age of 21. During this time i also used ecstasy fairly heavily on the weekends (usually 5-10 pills on a friday or saturday night)
I got over marijuana and Ecstasy and moved onto Cocaine which i have been using almost every weekend for the last 3 years.
Long story short, i used to be able to handle the comedowns and "scatness" fairly well... til i had my first panic attack on a sunday night about a year or two ago.
Since then my life has changed dramatically. Anxiety has been the scariest thing i've ever experienced and i would not wish this on my worst enemy.
I thought i was going crazy and i was going to be admitted to a psych ward with schizophrenia etc etc (pretty common symptoms of anxiety)
I sought help and was prescribed lexapro. This really helped me come to grips with my anxiety as it kept me calm as i studied as much as i could about my GAD
I came off lexapro after 6 months and stayed clean from drugs for about a year
Recently (the last 6 months or so) i have slipped back into the habit of recreational drug use along with binge drinking. Drug use is rampant amongst my group of friends and it is very hard to avoid.
My binges have come back with a vengeance, worse than before. They would start on a friday night and not finish well into sunday.
Sorry for the long boring post... almost finished
This weekend i had a binge which consisted of Cocaine, alcohol, MDMA, Ecstasy & Benzos.
Last night i had the worst panic attack i have ever had and almost admitted myself to hospital.
I battled through it and saw my therapist today. We have agreed that if i do this to myself again i will be checked into Rehab.
This was the biggest wake up call of my life.
So here i am... Day 1.
Hoping to find support from other likeminded individuals..!!
thanks
☀️⛳️
Join Date: Mar 2014
Location: Scotland
Posts: 1,506
Hi, firstly welcome to SR, this great forum is full of people who can relate to your situation, we have all been their and I applaud you for taking the stance and choosing a better life for yourself.
I wish you well.
I wish you well.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: sydney
Posts: 9
Thanks guys.
I really feel as if I mean it this time...
It's great to have a forum like this with other people in the same boat
When I tell my friends I usually just get the "stop being such a *****" "harden up" comments.
My goal is to be able to drink socially without spiralling into an all night / all weekend drug binge.
I really feel as if I mean it this time...
It's great to have a forum like this with other people in the same boat
When I tell my friends I usually just get the "stop being such a *****" "harden up" comments.
My goal is to be able to drink socially without spiralling into an all night / all weekend drug binge.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: C.C. Ma.
Posts: 3,697
Originally Posted by Iquit992 
Thanks guys.
I really feel as if I mean it this time...
My goal is to be able to drink socially without spiralling into an all night / all weekend drug binge.
I really feel as if I mean it this time...
My goal is to be able to drink socially without spiralling into an all night / all weekend drug binge.
If you are an alcoholic a few things are needed to have recovery for the long term. I and most had to be honest about our drinking to ourselves and then accept that we canNOT drink alcohol in safety. It’s that simple!
Moderation has been proven to be a next to impossible goal considering the circumstances.
“This weekend i had a binge which consisted of Cocaine, alcohol, MDMA, Ecstasy & Benzos.”
Sobriety is also dependant of eliminating all mind altering drugs as well because they usually end up with one leading to another.
If difficulty is encountered to do this a detox would be encouraged for safety reasons.
BE WELL
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Flevoland
Posts: 103
Welcome to SR! Your story sounds a bit like mine... except add a bunch of acid, a few more years and binges that last a week. =/
I consider being clean like a job. I really work at it. My urges to get ****** up come and go but when they come I have a bevy of tools in my toolbox to combat the feelings.
I am only now getting to long stretches of sobriety but I had to take a really hard look at myself and get brutally honest. I use drugs and alcohol addictively. There is no "normal" drinking that I can maintain. Don't let your addictive mind fool you into thinking that you can use and stop anytime. If I could do that I wouldn't be where I am now.
I wish you lots of luck. Stay around and read what others have to say and keep us posted on your progress.
I consider being clean like a job. I really work at it. My urges to get ****** up come and go but when they come I have a bevy of tools in my toolbox to combat the feelings.
I am only now getting to long stretches of sobriety but I had to take a really hard look at myself and get brutally honest. I use drugs and alcohol addictively. There is no "normal" drinking that I can maintain. Don't let your addictive mind fool you into thinking that you can use and stop anytime. If I could do that I wouldn't be where I am now.
I wish you lots of luck. Stay around and read what others have to say and keep us posted on your progress.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 819
Hi and welcome. I agee completely with IOAA2. If drinking in moderation were possible for me, I wouldn't be and alcoholic. I really feel for you with the anxiety. I have suffered from it even way before drinking. Drinking just makes it so much worse for me.
As for your friends, I can relate to that too. I have a brotther who is a very heavy drinker. When talking to him the other day about another subject-one that causes me stress that I have removed from my life-he told me to just chill out and go have a beer. I told him that wasn't the answer and he insisted. He drinks from 9am until he passes out everyday. I don't feel it is my place to tell him he has a drinking problem but I have decided that for now, in my early stages of sobriety, that I cannot be around him. Your friends may be afraid of losing a partying buddy.
As for your friends, I can relate to that too. I have a brotther who is a very heavy drinker. When talking to him the other day about another subject-one that causes me stress that I have removed from my life-he told me to just chill out and go have a beer. I told him that wasn't the answer and he insisted. He drinks from 9am until he passes out everyday. I don't feel it is my place to tell him he has a drinking problem but I have decided that for now, in my early stages of sobriety, that I cannot be around him. Your friends may be afraid of losing a partying buddy.
Canine Welfare Advocate
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: Norfolk, VA
Posts: 10,962
Originally Posted by Iquit992
...i have slipped back into the habit of recreational drug use along with binge drinking. Drug use is rampant amongst my group of friends and it is very hard to avoid.
Accept you have a problem and address it accordingly.
Do your best
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 67,047
Wow really honest big kudos there my friend
I was the exact same and if it is hard to avoid join AA or another recovery group where you can meet and do all things you want to do without the alcohol/drugs/medication playing a part
I would devote myself into getting better by asking myself the hard questions and facing up to it
No shame in admiiting its a problem only recognition and its what we do with that knowledge that frees us just keep being true to yourself and keep working at it
Well done on day 1 can't wait to read more of your posts !!!
All the best
I was the exact same and if it is hard to avoid join AA or another recovery group where you can meet and do all things you want to do without the alcohol/drugs/medication playing a part
I would devote myself into getting better by asking myself the hard questions and facing up to it
No shame in admiiting its a problem only recognition and its what we do with that knowledge that frees us just keep being true to yourself and keep working at it
Well done on day 1 can't wait to read more of your posts !!!
All the best
Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Oregon
Posts: 1,536
Hi and Welcome to SR.
This is the place to be if you want to stop and stay stopped. You will find support, honesty and even fun on these threads. Stick around with us. We won't think your a ***** for quitting drugs and alcohol. We think you ROCK for taking a step for your health and life!!! YAY for you!
This is the place to be if you want to stop and stay stopped. You will find support, honesty and even fun on these threads. Stick around with us. We won't think your a ***** for quitting drugs and alcohol. We think you ROCK for taking a step for your health and life!!! YAY for you!
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: sydney
Posts: 9
Thanks guys & girls
The early support is much appreciated.
This weekend will be a big test as I have a friends farewell party where the cocaine will be flying around freely.
I can't not go also as he is one of my best friends.
What coping mechanisms do you guys use to avoid using in social situations? Do you simply avoid the party ? Or do you have other techniques ?
The early support is much appreciated.
This weekend will be a big test as I have a friends farewell party where the cocaine will be flying around freely.
I can't not go also as he is one of my best friends.
What coping mechanisms do you guys use to avoid using in social situations? Do you simply avoid the party ? Or do you have other techniques ?
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