Trying to find a sponsor ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Fort Lauderdale Florida
Posts: 2
Trying to find a sponsor ?
I attend alanon meetings Mon, Weds, Thurs, Sun and ACA meetings on Tuesday . These meetings are run by different groups. I was advised that I need to find a home group. That I need to find a sponsor and work the steps. I live in fort Lauderdale and I am gay but feel uncomfortable in the gay meetings because to me it's show and tell and not about recovery there. I personally feel more comfortable in a mixed blend group because that is how the world I live in is. I live and breathe gay gay gay like some do. I suppose I've outgrown that phase in my life. It's find for others to grow through that phase on their own terms but I don't have to I feel I can evolve from that.
I go to several meetings because I don't like limiting myself to one point of view do finding a home group is not easy. I have been chairing the Monday and Wednesday groups but not Thursday Tuesday or sunday. Chairing is pretty easy in my opinion - the people really run their meeting , I'm just there to keep it organized like a figure head. To me it's easy. All meetings I chair do not mention sponsorship but Thursday group does. I am gay man and the Thursday meetings seem to be all women ( possibly a girls( lesbian)
club unofficially)... They won't let anyone chair a meeting unless they have a sponsor and are past their 6 step... Which doesn't bother me / but is soberhibg they added recently. Truthfully not a big deal I chair enough meetings. I am thinking of getting a sponsor at the thursday meeting.
I dont feel comfortable at an all girls club meeting setting but they are the only ones that speak about sponsorship.
I think that because I am a gay man I should get a woman sponsor but the rules are to get the same sex ???
What are your thoughts ?
I go to several meetings because I don't like limiting myself to one point of view do finding a home group is not easy. I have been chairing the Monday and Wednesday groups but not Thursday Tuesday or sunday. Chairing is pretty easy in my opinion - the people really run their meeting , I'm just there to keep it organized like a figure head. To me it's easy. All meetings I chair do not mention sponsorship but Thursday group does. I am gay man and the Thursday meetings seem to be all women ( possibly a girls( lesbian)
club unofficially)... They won't let anyone chair a meeting unless they have a sponsor and are past their 6 step... Which doesn't bother me / but is soberhibg they added recently. Truthfully not a big deal I chair enough meetings. I am thinking of getting a sponsor at the thursday meeting.
I dont feel comfortable at an all girls club meeting setting but they are the only ones that speak about sponsorship.
I think that because I am a gay man I should get a woman sponsor but the rules are to get the same sex ???
What are your thoughts ?
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Fort Lauderdale Florida
Posts: 2
Reply:
Hi Anna , I'm not sure if I'm replying correctly but here I go. 😊.
I read your message and I like your reply. I could try incorporating sponsorship into the meetings I chair. I could at first just use sponsorship as a topic and then ask if anyone in the meeting for a show of hands how many are looking for sponsors and then ask how many would like to be sponsors . And then let them talk that out after meetings or they can use the available phone list.
Thanks
I read your message and I like your reply. I could try incorporating sponsorship into the meetings I chair. I could at first just use sponsorship as a topic and then ask if anyone in the meeting for a show of hands how many are looking for sponsors and then ask how many would like to be sponsors . And then let them talk that out after meetings or they can use the available phone list.
Thanks
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: Melbourne, Victoria
Posts: 215
the women for women, men for men is not a rule, to my understanding, it is basically a guideline to try & prevent tear up's & jealousies in heterosexual marriage or relationships.
If your a gay man & you have a lesbian sponsor ... I can't see that causing too much, if any trouble. In fact, seems like an ideal match.
Ask your potential sponsor two questions
Have you had a spiritual awakening as the result of taking the 12 steps ?
Can you explain how the fourth step inventory works ?
If they've done em, they'll be able to answer without sounding like they are fumbling an answer or making up something that isn't in the BB.
If your a gay man & you have a lesbian sponsor ... I can't see that causing too much, if any trouble. In fact, seems like an ideal match.
Ask your potential sponsor two questions
Have you had a spiritual awakening as the result of taking the 12 steps ?
Can you explain how the fourth step inventory works ?
If they've done em, they'll be able to answer without sounding like they are fumbling an answer or making up something that isn't in the BB.
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