Barely hanging on-isolating
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 92
Barely hanging on-isolating
Hello,
I am going through way too much family stress (with my 81 year old disabled mom and everything falling on me to do). I've isolated myself by quitting facebook and not being social. I am still going to meetings but I am feeling very bad. I am trying to take it one day at a time but I am an emotional basket case. How do you get through the tough times?
I am going through way too much family stress (with my 81 year old disabled mom and everything falling on me to do). I've isolated myself by quitting facebook and not being social. I am still going to meetings but I am feeling very bad. I am trying to take it one day at a time but I am an emotional basket case. How do you get through the tough times?
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
do you speak to anyone at the meetings you attend ?
do you have a sponsor ?
the first thing i have to do for me is lose my fear of letting others help me, i have to use the simple tools like opening my mouth in an aa room or using the phone and talking to my sponsor or someone else from aa
as good as aa is and i love it with all my heart, no one in aa can mind read or know how i am feeling if i dont tell them
all to often i see people come to aa sit there in the meetings and then go home without so much as a chat to anyone, i do try to go over and chat to people who i see are like this and very often they say i am fine or ok i ask them how they really feel and they still say i am fine or ok
other than that there is not much else i can do to help someone if there not willing to open up
i know its a hard thing to do is to open up but honestly its the only way then when hard times hit you will be able to contact others with ease if you need a friend but we all have to push ourself to overcome our inner feelings or thoughts of not wanting to do it
do you have a sponsor ?
the first thing i have to do for me is lose my fear of letting others help me, i have to use the simple tools like opening my mouth in an aa room or using the phone and talking to my sponsor or someone else from aa
as good as aa is and i love it with all my heart, no one in aa can mind read or know how i am feeling if i dont tell them
all to often i see people come to aa sit there in the meetings and then go home without so much as a chat to anyone, i do try to go over and chat to people who i see are like this and very often they say i am fine or ok i ask them how they really feel and they still say i am fine or ok
other than that there is not much else i can do to help someone if there not willing to open up
i know its a hard thing to do is to open up but honestly its the only way then when hard times hit you will be able to contact others with ease if you need a friend but we all have to push ourself to overcome our inner feelings or thoughts of not wanting to do it
Hi snakes, I know how you're feeling, Im isolating and finding it hard to even go to meetings at the moment, its early days for me barely a week and I know I have to dig deep and get through these hard early days, posting here reading lots of recovery stuff and forcing myself to call other people in recovery are the ways that I can get through until my head hits the pillow tonight, a drink won't solve anything only create more stress in the long run, wish you all the best.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2014
Posts: 92
I haven't found a sponsor yet but I am meeting with 2 potential sponsors tomorrow. One before a meeting and one after. I am a yakker and do a good job of talking at meetings. I just an so distraught at the moment and feel like withdrawing. I know that is not a good way to be. Plus, to be honest, dealing with my mom is EXHAUSTING. My husband is kind of mean about it too. He says I am overreacting and dealing with her, trying to get her into a memory care place that takes people with her issues, dealing with the finances, the doctors, etc. isn't a big deal and I am making too much of it.
It just stinks right now. I am ready to vanish into nowhere and leave everyone (except my kid) behind.
It just stinks right now. I am ready to vanish into nowhere and leave everyone (except my kid) behind.
Break it down to 1 day at a time, you only have to make it to bedtime Sober and that's another day ticked off!!
Any chance of getting some fresh air? I always find it great to clear my head!!
Hang in there!! You can do this!!
Any chance of getting some fresh air? I always find it great to clear my head!!
Hang in there!! You can do this!!
I was going to ask if you had a pastor you could talk with.
It's easy to think in early recovery that when tough times come and they knock us around, that it is because we haven't learned how to deal with them effectively...that drinking was how we dealt with tough times. No, drinking was how we escaped from tough times. Now that we are sober, what do we do?
Sometimes nothing. There is no quick fix when life is kicking the snot out of us. I asked "normies" how they dealt with tough times and they were just as challenged as I was. But they didn't drink, they didn't seek to escape or drown the tough times away with booze. So how do we get through the difficult times? We tough it out. We address the problems that can be addressed, we don't fret or get worrisome over the things we have no control of.
Personally, I pray for strength to get through the difficult times. It doesnt make the problems go away, but I handle them better.
It's easy to think in early recovery that when tough times come and they knock us around, that it is because we haven't learned how to deal with them effectively...that drinking was how we dealt with tough times. No, drinking was how we escaped from tough times. Now that we are sober, what do we do?
Sometimes nothing. There is no quick fix when life is kicking the snot out of us. I asked "normies" how they dealt with tough times and they were just as challenged as I was. But they didn't drink, they didn't seek to escape or drown the tough times away with booze. So how do we get through the difficult times? We tough it out. We address the problems that can be addressed, we don't fret or get worrisome over the things we have no control of.
Personally, I pray for strength to get through the difficult times. It doesnt make the problems go away, but I handle them better.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
I haven't found a sponsor yet but I am meeting with 2 potential sponsors tomorrow. One before a meeting and one after. I am a yakker and do a good job of talking at meetings. I just an so distraught at the moment and feel like withdrawing. I know that is not a good way to be. Plus, to be honest, dealing with my mom is EXHAUSTING. My husband is kind of mean about it too. He says I am overreacting and dealing with her, trying to get her into a memory care place that takes people with her issues, dealing with the finances, the doctors, etc. isn't a big deal and I am making too much of it.
It just stinks right now. I am ready to vanish into nowhere and leave everyone (except my kid) behind.
It just stinks right now. I am ready to vanish into nowhere and leave everyone (except my kid) behind.
it doesn't help in the slightest except make me smile at myself. : ) you never know it might just make you smile as well and then things will not look so bad ?
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