huntingtontx

I have read so many posts on here where people are putting themselves down. This breaks my heart. God did not make any junk. We are all worth something. I am asking those that read this to be kind to yourself today. Treat yourself with love and respect. For me part of love and respect was how I ate and drank, but a bigger part was the self talk to yourself. Talk to yourself with love and respect, as you would someone you loved, like your child. We can do this, and we can become better people. But not by being cruel to ourselves. We are on this journey together, all helping each other along the way. Please be kind to yourself and others. I think it is a key to success. Big hugs

Opivotal

Thank you for posting this Hunt! I couldn't agree more.

SoberLeigh

I agree, huntingtontx. Be kind and gentle to yourselves, everyone, and to each other.

tomsteve

good stuff there, tx!!!
I was so friggin hateful towards myself when I got into recovery.felt I was a useless, worthless, hopeless, helpless POS. I had heard people sayin I wasn't, but wasn't believing it.
then one day after a meeting a woman walked up to me. proly one of the kindest,soft spoken, loving woman I have ever met. she said to me,"tom, listening to your self hatred is hurtin me. not sure about what God you have but the one I have don't make no junk, so maybe ya want to switch Gods. something I think you should do, and im sure you haven't done this in a very long time, is go look at yourself in the mirror. right into your own eye. then tell yourself you love you and so does God."
man that was hard!! but ya know, eventually I was feeling something a lil different.
then I thought it could be true that I wasn't a useless,worthless, hopeless, helpless, POS.
then I believed it.
and today, by the grace of God, I love me. don't always like what I do, but I love me.

SoberLeigh

That woman was absolutely right, tomsteve. Those of us at SR see a pretty great guy.

lunar

Wow, that hit home.
That was me, not so long ago.
Pretty recently, actually.
Thanks!

Fly N Buy

Great words of wisdom! In new sobriety, and frankly for a very long time now - my self esteem wavered tremendously. I am still seeking the truth = light about who I am. I suppose it's a life time journey.

I am very grateful for taking this journey sober!

I go from bouts of tremendous ego - which I have come to understand is really false pride, to not liking myself very much.

Your post really struck a chord about talking to oneself with love and respect. Great advice, and really needed to read that.

Thank you......

Verte

Thanks for the boost huntingtontx

Ultramarathoner

Totally agree with the importance of self-talk. Also, from what I understand,
our subconscious works better with positive statements in the present tense

"I am alcohol free", "I enjoy being sober", "I love myself unconditionally" may be more powerful than "In the future I will never have another drink".

Zig Ziglar often said "You are what you are and where you are because of what has gone into your mind. You can change what you are and where you are by changing what's gone into your mind".

To be clear, I'm certainly no expert on any of this stuff- and have only been alcohol free about a month. Just trying to help where I can

HeadLump

Lovely post, huntington, which I'm sure will hit home for many of us.

I've recently started meditating and have found it extremely helpful in stimulating kindness towards myself and others

firstymer

Thanks for the great reminder, Huntingtontx. I think the way a person treats others is often a reflection of how they feel about themself.

I also think that when we finally commit to the decision to stop drinking, it is a recognition that there IS something good within us that is worth resurrecting and nurturing. Some people are just slower than others to reach that moment of recognition.

"God did not make any junk." I like that. A lot.

Hobbers

Yup. So far, no one has come close to making me feel as worthless or ashamed as... me.


I don't see that changing anytime soon (cool picture or not).

Anna

It's so very important and often so very hard for alcoholics to do this, especially when we're in the downward spiral or recovering from a relapse. It's true that I never talked to anyone, ever, the way I used to talk to myself. The good news is that we can learn to change our thoughts and self-talk and boost our self-esteem.

Hobbers

I'm hoping for that day, Anna. I really am.

tomsteve

it can happen if you want it!!

how bout takin a lil time right now and doin what I was told to do?

yer worth it!

jaynie04

I agree..I think most alcoholics suffer not from too much ego, but from a lack of a true sense of respect for ourselves, and wavering boundaries, both personal and external. Honoring oneself makes sobriety out to be the most important decision any of us can make. I was excellent at respecting, protecting and loving other people, at my own expense. By drawing into myself I was able to redefine who I am and what I deserve. It all started with understanding that I have a right to be happy.

PurpleKnight

Nice post!!

courage2

Thanks, Huntingtontx! I often think of your idea that I quoted -- if we can imagine someone we actually cared about, we wouldn't dream of treating them with the disrespect and self-loathing we casually show to ourselves. Part of early recovery especially is showing yourself the empathy you would to anyone recovering from a long, bad illness. Beautiful post!

MrBen

I do love myself. Not as much as I did when I was a teenager but who has that kind of time?

Jokes aside I've struggled with self esteem throughout my life. Honestly, I think I had fair reason to not like who I'd become. I was not a good person. I wasn't abusive or angry, but I was extremely selfish drunk.

I'm steadily becoming someone I can be proud of.

Soberpotamus

Thanks