Ok so he committed suicide
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
When I was a little girl, my friend Danny's big brother "went fishing, fell off the rocks and drowned". It was incredibly sad, we all knew Phillip.
When I was in sixth form my friend Garry had a go at me and I said, "Oh my heart bleeds for you, I hope yours bleeds to death." His did. Seven years later he committed suicide and I was left with awful guilt over an unrelated remark.
When I was 25 a school classmate -- who was the comedian of our class --committed suicide.
Then there were the suicides of the students that I taught.
Recently there was the younger brother of our first employee.
Does anyone understand suicide? I don't know but I know I don't. I do understand the tremendous horror that comes when someone we know commits suicide and I know the grief that follows.
Does anyone know how to react to suicide? Probably not. Does anyone know how to react to death of any kind? When my elderly mother dies I know there will be a lot of: "Well at least she had a good innings" and that's true.
I think that what startles all of us is death, it most particularly startles we addicts because we think we can keep cheating it. Then it happens, one of us falls for whatever reason and that scares us. Badly. And that's a good thing.
Because the most special thing is, that amongst all the angst, we have life.
When I was in sixth form my friend Garry had a go at me and I said, "Oh my heart bleeds for you, I hope yours bleeds to death." His did. Seven years later he committed suicide and I was left with awful guilt over an unrelated remark.
When I was 25 a school classmate -- who was the comedian of our class --committed suicide.
Then there were the suicides of the students that I taught.
Recently there was the younger brother of our first employee.
Does anyone understand suicide? I don't know but I know I don't. I do understand the tremendous horror that comes when someone we know commits suicide and I know the grief that follows.
Does anyone know how to react to suicide? Probably not. Does anyone know how to react to death of any kind? When my elderly mother dies I know there will be a lot of: "Well at least she had a good innings" and that's true.
I think that what startles all of us is death, it most particularly startles we addicts because we think we can keep cheating it. Then it happens, one of us falls for whatever reason and that scares us. Badly. And that's a good thing.
Because the most special thing is, that amongst all the angst, we have life.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 294
I had a thought about suicide that got me thinking more. I wanted to share it as I'm interested in what others think... Not everyone who commits suicide has suffered from or is suffering from depression. That was the thought I had. Please don't bite my head off if you don't agree, it was just a thought I had after reading some of the comments here. Its not related to Robin, I do not think he committed a selfish act. I am saddened by his death as we all are. Sorry in advance if this post is not relevant to this thread and belongs elsewhere.
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Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Baton Rouge, La.
Posts: 15,238
My thoughts this morning is about
after reading articles, stories about
Robin yesterday and all those other
famous celebrities that passed away
like, Michael Jackson, Elvis, Cobain,
and oh my God so many others, is
how no one stepped up to help them
in their illness or sickness.
I mean, how can you help these famous
people when they are untouchable? Who
would go over ELVIS to get him help?
People saw that he was in danger of
himself in those final yrs. with failing
health, weight gain etc. and yet people
may have brought it to his attention
showing concern, yet no one went well
beyond the call of duty to help him.
What would it take to hog tie these famous
people to get them help. Who would be
willing to pull the ultimate act of kindness
and concern to help people that are 'bigger
than life'?
Who would step up to the plate and grab
say Michael Jackson? Would you touch
him? or could you touch him with a 10ft
pole to help him?
Just my thoughts.
after reading articles, stories about
Robin yesterday and all those other
famous celebrities that passed away
like, Michael Jackson, Elvis, Cobain,
and oh my God so many others, is
how no one stepped up to help them
in their illness or sickness.
I mean, how can you help these famous
people when they are untouchable? Who
would go over ELVIS to get him help?
People saw that he was in danger of
himself in those final yrs. with failing
health, weight gain etc. and yet people
may have brought it to his attention
showing concern, yet no one went well
beyond the call of duty to help him.
What would it take to hog tie these famous
people to get them help. Who would be
willing to pull the ultimate act of kindness
and concern to help people that are 'bigger
than life'?
Who would step up to the plate and grab
say Michael Jackson? Would you touch
him? or could you touch him with a 10ft
pole to help him?
Just my thoughts.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upper Midwest
Posts: 1,730
I knew a judge once who used to preside over mental health commitment hearings. Those hearings involved the forced hospitization and treatment of people who had tried to kill themselves. This judge would often say that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
I know that may seem like an oversimplification of a complex issue. But, I also think there is a lot of truth to it.
Most of us here at SR are living proof (literally, living proof) that things DO get better. That life IS worth living. The pain, as severe as it may be, that causes people to consider suicide, is so often, temporary. I just wish that those who are struggling with depression (or, for that matter, with alcoholism or addiction), could see that.
I know that may seem like an oversimplification of a complex issue. But, I also think there is a lot of truth to it.
Most of us here at SR are living proof (literally, living proof) that things DO get better. That life IS worth living. The pain, as severe as it may be, that causes people to consider suicide, is so often, temporary. I just wish that those who are struggling with depression (or, for that matter, with alcoholism or addiction), could see that.
Member
Join Date: May 2012
Location: canada
Posts: 7,242
Not everyone who commits suicide has suffered from or is suffering from depression.
from what i've read, that seems to be so.
a useful-to-me book on depression and which has a bunch to say on suicide is Andrew Solomon's "The Noonday Demon".
from what i've read, that seems to be so.
a useful-to-me book on depression and which has a bunch to say on suicide is Andrew Solomon's "The Noonday Demon".
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Originally Posted by aasharon90 
Who would step up to the plate and grab
say Michael Jackson? Would you touch
him? or could you touch him with a 10ft
pole to help him?
Just my thoughts.
say Michael Jackson? Would you touch
him? or could you touch him with a 10ft
pole to help him?
Just my thoughts.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: milwaukee wi
Posts: 3,574
Hi all if you can go to my Face Book page ardith richter, found a video on Robin Williams that just says so very very much... wish I could put it up .here. for it comes from his heart to us all. love ardy
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: milwaukee wi
Posts: 3,574
Originally Posted by CuteNGayYay
this is worth the minute.. brought tears, inspiration and courage into my heart.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6csfDT5ovps
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6csfDT5ovps
Molotov Kitty!
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: Chicago IL
Posts: 60
Originally Posted by Croissant
I can only speak of my personal experience, but the shift in thought processes is so skewed in the lead up to contemplating suicide, it is scary.
Irrational thoughts became logical thoughts, they make sense. I'm only here today because of a sliding doors moment.
Even though I lost my first boyfriend to suicide in high school - at the point of me contemplating suicide, I did not even relate what I was going through as similar to what he may have. My own experience (again, not up for debate, I'm just stating my own personal thought processes), was that feeding depressive thoughts over time, just exacerbated the problem, to the point my own thoughts were propelling me to a self-fulfilling prophecy. I was hallucinating and telling myself ridiculous things at the end.
When I think how close I came it scares me...literally shocks me.
For those who can't relate and will never understand (thank goodness) what it feels like, I can only describe that voice as something like the AV amped at 1,000,000%, if you've experienced how irrational the AV is, and the crazy things it can make you do. Then have some compassion for those who most likely would never have taken their lives and never chosen that outcome with a stable mind.
This happened way before I ever drank, and sadly, I lost two family members to suicide also. I like your analogy Jezza, it is like depression, untreated, becomes a cancer that has the potential to suck the life out of you, and kill you.
Irrational thoughts became logical thoughts, they make sense. I'm only here today because of a sliding doors moment.
Even though I lost my first boyfriend to suicide in high school - at the point of me contemplating suicide, I did not even relate what I was going through as similar to what he may have. My own experience (again, not up for debate, I'm just stating my own personal thought processes), was that feeding depressive thoughts over time, just exacerbated the problem, to the point my own thoughts were propelling me to a self-fulfilling prophecy. I was hallucinating and telling myself ridiculous things at the end.
When I think how close I came it scares me...literally shocks me.
For those who can't relate and will never understand (thank goodness) what it feels like, I can only describe that voice as something like the AV amped at 1,000,000%, if you've experienced how irrational the AV is, and the crazy things it can make you do. Then have some compassion for those who most likely would never have taken their lives and never chosen that outcome with a stable mind.
This happened way before I ever drank, and sadly, I lost two family members to suicide also. I like your analogy Jezza, it is like depression, untreated, becomes a cancer that has the potential to suck the life out of you, and kill you.
I really liked your post, I attempted to wrap it up in a tight little package...
"At times, your thoughts, actions, and behaviors can be so skewed that irrational interpretations become real and your self-fulling prophecy is no longer one you intended to write..."
Thanks & best to you,
Jeff
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 342
I hesitate to comment on a thread like this as it affects many people who have been touched in their lives. I do not intend to offend but I had a couple of thoughts to get out.
Yeh funtime franky I had the same thought. Depression is assumed to be a factor for Robin Williams suicide, the fact is it might have played little or no role whatsoever.
As for being selfish, I can understand a family member left to deal with the fallout, considering the act 'selfish'. They are entitled to their opinion based on the facts as they know them to be.
I have been to enough suicides in my day and the resulting thoughts and emotions from family and friends have ranged a spectrum from "selfish" through to "now they are at peace" and everything in between, depending on the scenario. They also change over time.
A bit like this thread.
We tend to overgeneralize for various reasons. We are all unique individuals. Each case of suicide is different and should be looked at on its circumstances and contributing factors, most of which we are not privy to anyway.
Peace
Yeh funtime franky I had the same thought. Depression is assumed to be a factor for Robin Williams suicide, the fact is it might have played little or no role whatsoever.
As for being selfish, I can understand a family member left to deal with the fallout, considering the act 'selfish'. They are entitled to their opinion based on the facts as they know them to be.
I have been to enough suicides in my day and the resulting thoughts and emotions from family and friends have ranged a spectrum from "selfish" through to "now they are at peace" and everything in between, depending on the scenario. They also change over time.
A bit like this thread.
We tend to overgeneralize for various reasons. We are all unique individuals. Each case of suicide is different and should be looked at on its circumstances and contributing factors, most of which we are not privy to anyway.
Peace
Member
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: BC
Posts: 557
Having just experienced the suicide of a close friend, I can see and accept all sides of this discussion. When I see the anguish of the wife and teenage sons left behind, I feel anger; when I read his notes written just before he took his life, I feel a deep compassion for the seeming helplessness of his situation; when I think about the person that he was, I feel a huge remorse and sadness that he is gone. One thing I can never do is judge him, or his state of mind that night ... his thought processes that led to that decision. I am saddened, angered, confused, frightened ... so many emotions that shift seemingly with the wind. But ultimately, it is not my place nor my right to judge his decision. May he rest in peace ... finally.
(Sorry if that last line offends anyone ... but I truly wish that)
(Sorry if that last line offends anyone ... but I truly wish that)
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: USA
Posts: 642
Originally Posted by Chilledice
I agree with it being selfish BUT the person who goes through with the suicide is BOUND to have some mental health issues going on, I really don't think they are in full control I just don't!
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