is there a purpose?
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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Originally Posted by Dee74 
Did you try a different group Master Skywalker, or was it the same one?
D
D
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Skywalker
I know all too well the feelings you are experiencing. To be honest, seeing you able to talk about it and admit to it amazes me. I struggle with so many of those same thoughts and feelings and they always pushed me to drink. Im glad you were willing to bring it up because I know, for me at least, that I am not really alone because of all these people struggling the same way as I am. At the very least it is something I am finding comforting after my first sober day in weeks.
It can be so easy to fall into those pits of dispair. I couldnt get out of bed yesterday. Could barely eat. Im up at 4am because I can't sleep. All I know is that through hard work and change and with help from this community good things will happen. I urge you to keep fighting the good fight.
I know all too well the feelings you are experiencing. To be honest, seeing you able to talk about it and admit to it amazes me. I struggle with so many of those same thoughts and feelings and they always pushed me to drink. Im glad you were willing to bring it up because I know, for me at least, that I am not really alone because of all these people struggling the same way as I am. At the very least it is something I am finding comforting after my first sober day in weeks.
It can be so easy to fall into those pits of dispair. I couldnt get out of bed yesterday. Could barely eat. Im up at 4am because I can't sleep. All I know is that through hard work and change and with help from this community good things will happen. I urge you to keep fighting the good fight.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
Posts: 1,708
Originally Posted by MasterSkywalker
you're all correct... although being 12 days sober im not ready to journey out and be around strangers... ive been to AA tons of times and each time it has been a terrible experience with the members ignoring me and not talking to me... i told them i was a newcomer and it didnt matter, they looked at me like i was lying to them, like i wasnt serious...
they can expect phone numbers given and a lot of friendly people who will be happy to help
try ringing the aa hotline number and explain to them the problem you had in a meeting they will be able to direct you to a meeting and like i said someone might even call out should you wish and take you along to a meeting if you wish so at least you would know 1 person and not feel as strange in the rooms
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Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Midwest, USA
Posts: 1,022
There are things to enjoy in life that don't involve extroversion. What do you like to do?
I didn't have much in the way of passions when I was drinking, other than drinking, and maybe my girlfriend. She left and I quit drinking, so I didn't have really any passions for awhile. I returned to some of the hobbies from back when I was young and not a drinker, and found out I still love them.
It's important to have something or things that you enjoy. There's a lot of life that isn't maybe as enjoyable, so you need something to look forward to, something that keeps you invested in your life.
The first few weeks of sobriety are kind of a rough stretch for some, though, that's what I am relating here. Maybe not the time for a full-on happiness/fulfillment assessment.
For me it got better after a couple of months, and I have heard that from other people, too.
I didn't have much in the way of passions when I was drinking, other than drinking, and maybe my girlfriend. She left and I quit drinking, so I didn't have really any passions for awhile. I returned to some of the hobbies from back when I was young and not a drinker, and found out I still love them.
It's important to have something or things that you enjoy. There's a lot of life that isn't maybe as enjoyable, so you need something to look forward to, something that keeps you invested in your life.
The first few weeks of sobriety are kind of a rough stretch for some, though, that's what I am relating here. Maybe not the time for a full-on happiness/fulfillment assessment.
For me it got better after a couple of months, and I have heard that from other people, too.
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Originally Posted by desypete
i find this astonishing to hear, as the meetings are the place were new comers are treated like the most important person in the room over here in the uk
they can expect phone numbers given and a lot of friendly people who will be happy to help
try ringing the aa hotline number and explain to them the problem you had in a meeting they will be able to direct you to a meeting and like i said someone might even call out should you wish and take you along to a meeting if you wish so at least you would know 1 person and not feel as strange in the rooms
they can expect phone numbers given and a lot of friendly people who will be happy to help
try ringing the aa hotline number and explain to them the problem you had in a meeting they will be able to direct you to a meeting and like i said someone might even call out should you wish and take you along to a meeting if you wish so at least you would know 1 person and not feel as strange in the rooms
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Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 52
There is a place! Just because we haven't found it yet doesn't mean we wont. Everyone should be able to feel like they belong somewhere. I hate that feeling of being alone even when others seem so content but I know now it's because I have a problem that I was ignoring. I have faith that once I can move past drugs and alcohol, at the very least I will be at home within myself
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Join Date: Jun 2014
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Originally Posted by LastMistake
There is a place! Just because we haven't found it yet doesn't mean we wont. Everyone should be able to feel like they belong somewhere. I hate that feeling of being alone even when others seem so content but I know now it's because I have a problem that I was ignoring. I have faith that once I can move past drugs and alcohol, at the very least I will be at home within myself
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Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
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I'm sorry you feel there's not a place for you. I'm not sure how old you are but I didn't find my 'place' until I was in my 40s.
I really believe it's never too late to write a new ending to your story.
There may well be 'rude and snobby' people everywhere, but not everyone is like that...
if you go in expecting that you might find you're pre-determining the outcome?
D
I really believe it's never too late to write a new ending to your story.
There may well be 'rude and snobby' people everywhere, but not everyone is like that...
if you go in expecting that you might find you're pre-determining the outcome?
D
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
When I think my way into a corner, I go back to reading The Myth of Sisyphus by Albert Camus. You can download it free online these days. Classic existentialism about sparing your life by creating meaning out senseless toil (that's a bit of an oversimplification, obviously). Life is about process, not product. We can change our perception, and that changes everything. For now, though, you'll need some time to get your body chemistry balanced. Soldier on, my friend!
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Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Aberdeen SD
Posts: 180
I feel your pain. Been there. I make the choice to live, one day at a time by not drinking, otherwise I would be dead in a few weeks. I try to learn one new thing a day I did not know. I consider that a good day. Keeping posting and reading. I've learned a lot of new things I did not know right here on SR.
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yea, live sober, alone and rejected from society... what kind of purpose is that? i dont think anyone can truly understand my pain and suffering.... im sick of hearing there is a better side when in reality there isnt... its lies and false propaganda.....
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Originally Posted by MasterSkywalker
yea, live sober, alone and rejected from society... what kind of purpose is that? i dont think anyone can truly understand my pain and suffering.... im sick of hearing there is a better side when in reality there isnt... its lies and false propaganda.....
It just seems there has to something in the world that you actually like! Even one good thing will give you something to build on.
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Originally Posted by MythOfSisyphus
I know you probably disagree with this but I'll say it anyway: Life is 20% what happens to us and 80% how we deal with it. For every instance of false propaganda I'll show you three cases of self fulfilling prophecies. Maybe you will have to be angry at the world a little longer before you're ready to let go of it, I dunno.
It just seems there has to something in the world that you actually like! Even one good thing will give you something to build on.
It just seems there has to something in the world that you actually like! Even one good thing will give you something to build on.
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: liverpool, england
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Originally Posted by MasterSkywalker
all i do everyday is sit and play video games... that is all i like... that isnt living...
its down to you my friend to start to work on changing your life. everyone of us at one time had to give up our old ways of living and try to fit in with the world that wouldnt do anything for us
the world will never do anything for you or people will never be able to help you if you shut it out at every turn.
your post has done me so much good as i thank you for that, as you show me were i was many years ago when the world looked so black and i wasnt willing to do anything about me other than sit in my flat and complain the world isnt fair or no one loved me etc
i just couldn't see it was me shutting the world out and it was me who was sitting there doing nothing, it doesnt have to be like that for you anymore but sadly you will have to make the efforts
the only other thing i can think of to suggest is try a rehab as there you will be with other people who will feel just like you and who will also no doubt not want to be around people ? but i am expecting you to say you will not try it ?
good luck to you and i hope one day you will find the courage needed to start the work on you
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Join Date: Apr 2013
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The truth is that there are people who are not rude and snobbish. But there also are people and the majority may seem that way. Or they genuinely happen to be so.
And those who are snobbish and rude, it is their problem and loss. This is where I think the idea generally is to discard and ignore the portion of people you don't like and just know that there are others, different people.
Generally what I do is avoid people I don't like and contact/communication with them. No need to waste time on them since they decide to be the way they are.
And those who are snobbish and rude, it is their problem and loss. This is where I think the idea generally is to discard and ignore the portion of people you don't like and just know that there are others, different people.
Generally what I do is avoid people I don't like and contact/communication with them. No need to waste time on them since they decide to be the way they are.
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Originally Posted by desypete
well if thats all your willing to do then how can anyone help you ?
its down to you my friend to start to work on changing your life. everyone of us at one time had to give up our old ways of living and try to fit in with the world that wouldnt do anything for us
the world will never do anything for you or people will never be able to help you if you shut it out at every turn.
your post has done me so much good as i thank you for that, as you show me were i was many years ago when the world looked so black and i wasnt willing to do anything about me other than sit in my flat and complain the world isnt fair or no one loved me etc
i just couldn't see it was me shutting the world out and it was me who was sitting there doing nothing, it doesnt have to be like that for you anymore but sadly you will have to make the efforts
the only other thing i can think of to suggest is try a rehab as there you will be with other people who will feel just like you and who will also no doubt not want to be around people ? but i am expecting you to say you will not try it ?
good luck to you and i hope one day you will find the courage needed to start the work on you
its down to you my friend to start to work on changing your life. everyone of us at one time had to give up our old ways of living and try to fit in with the world that wouldnt do anything for us
the world will never do anything for you or people will never be able to help you if you shut it out at every turn.
your post has done me so much good as i thank you for that, as you show me were i was many years ago when the world looked so black and i wasnt willing to do anything about me other than sit in my flat and complain the world isnt fair or no one loved me etc
i just couldn't see it was me shutting the world out and it was me who was sitting there doing nothing, it doesnt have to be like that for you anymore but sadly you will have to make the efforts
the only other thing i can think of to suggest is try a rehab as there you will be with other people who will feel just like you and who will also no doubt not want to be around people ? but i am expecting you to say you will not try it ?
good luck to you and i hope one day you will find the courage needed to start the work on you
well let me start off by saying that this is america, filled with rude people... LOTS of rude people... the section of this dumpy country i live in has nothing but 100% rude aholes... u just dont run out in the middle of nowhere and find success... i guess nobody here knows what social anxiety is... how hard it is to just goto the store to buy food... i force myself to do that and i hate it... im getting real tired of nobody understanding me and always telling me, its THIS way or else...
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Originally Posted by MasterSkywalker
well let me start off by saying that this is america, filled with rude people... LOTS of rude people... the section of this dumpy country i live in has nothing but 100% rude aholes... u just dont run out in the middle of nowhere and find success... i guess nobody here knows what social anxiety is... how hard it is to just goto the store to buy food... i force myself to do that and i hate it... im getting real tired of nobody understanding me and always telling me, its THIS way or else...
Paint the picture for me. I know there are a lot of snobby and rude ppl around. I've been lucky that I've never met one in my searches to get sober but I do have to deal with them at my job everyday.
I want more information on the rude and snobby ppl that surround your attempts at getting sober so we can shoot them all down with SR awesomeness.
My best,
Melina
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