PurpleKnight

Are you doing this on sheer willpower or have you a plan and support in place??

You gotta do whatever it takes to make this work!!

You can do this!!

RunnerBean

I don't have any support to be honest. I'm going to try to integrate myself within the SR community and also throw myself into hobbies and personal growth.

That's all I've got so far.

theatredork

I have a similar story, too. I agree that the addiction voice in my head will tell me anything, no matter how crazy, to move me onto the path toward drinking again.

BUT... keeping away from alcohol, building a network of supportive people (whether in meetings/counselor/real life or online, or both), talking about it.... all of that made the cravings go away for me (mostly). At least now if I get a craving I can recognize it. A few days in, even a month or so in, I could not recognize it. At some point it is about trust - other people have done this, and I can too. And so can you.

AcceptableAdder

I know exactly how you feel. You're story reminds me so much of my own. All any of us can try to do is ignore/discourage/whatever you have to do to make that voice that says its OK to start back up again silenced. I just wish I wasn't so prideful so I could speak to my friends about this, I feel so embarrassed.

Do you ever feel like this?

least

I hope you get the support you need to stop drinking for good.

RunnerBean

I only really have two friends that I talk to about anything more than small talk. And they are my childhood friends, who I drink with. They both believe my relationship with alcohol is ''Not that bad'' which is an opinion shared by my family. So when everybody around me dismisses my problem, their collective attitude trickles into my thoughts, giving me ''permission'' to drink.

In answer to your question @acceptableadder, I often feel the way in which you described. But for me it's not pride, it's fear of further dismissal, enabling me to drink more and more.

ForgetfulKevin

RE: dismissive attitude of other people -- this is where SR or face to face support groups can really help, because you are talking with people who will take you at your word about this and who have a lot of shared background.

Wishing you well!

Dee74

Hi RB

I used to wonder if I was one of those who couldn't quit either...all my friends were drinkers, I had nothing in my life but drinking...

The good news is I drank for nearly the amount of time you've been alive...and I turned it round.

I had to make some pretty major changes - and that was scary - but it was less scary than the drinking future I saw in front of me.

whaddya think? time for some changes?


D

bookmaven

I heard once that people who tell you your drinking is "not that bad" are really not looking out for your best interests and that they might only be afraid of losing you. Alternatively, if they are drinking as much as you did, then they would have a drinking problem too. Telling an addict that using their drug of choice is "not that bad" is absurd.

newhope01

I have to agree with bookmaven. Sometimes our friends and family may also have a problem with substance abuse and don't want to lose their "drinking buddy" or maybe forced to look at themselves.

Friends and family use to tell me that I didn't have a problem but I knew better. In fact my first post on SR was actually describing how no one thought I was a drunk but me. After all, I don't think I would have been on SR at 4AM on a weeknight/morning because I was ashamed of my drinking and couldn't sleep.

I think deep down we always know the truth about ourselves.