I need your support this week
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: London
Posts: 71
I need your support this week
I am so scarred that I am in a situation whereby without boring you with the details, I could so easily have that first drink. I've been sober for almost six months. I seam to get to this stage whereby I convince myself that I have it all under control now and that if I have a drink then I can control having just the one. I am staying in a beautiful hotel with my family, my room has a mini bar and in an hour we will be going downstairs for supper in a very lovely restaurant with pretty tables laden with wine glasses. This is the first day of a weeks holiday! HELP
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
I keep asking myself why would I be able to control it now, when I couldn't control it 6 months ago? what exactly has changed in that time? has my genetic make up changed?
The answer is always no, but sometimes our minds tries to lie to us!!
Hang in there and rebut that myth!!
The answer is always no, but sometimes our minds tries to lie to us!!
Hang in there and rebut that myth!!
Member
Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
boy I know the feeling!! Been battling that voice hard at times since passing 6 months some time ago... from 226 days I can report that when I ride out that voice and overpower it with honoring my CHOICE.... when I hold onto all the reasons I choose sobriety and don't give in; it passes.
And I feel better for it.
Hang in there and don't hesitate to get on here as your lifeline.
And I feel better for it.
Hang in there and don't hesitate to get on here as your lifeline.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: London
Posts: 71
I have just returned from a 2 hour dinner with everyone around me drinking very classy wine. It was soooooooooo hard
but I got through it. I only have 6 more nights of that to get through. My chosen drink tonight was soda water. I struggled through the conversations and if I am totally honest found myself very board and having an internal pity party for one. However and it is a big however, I know that I will sleep well tonight and wake up not hating myself in the morning. Thank you everyone for your much needed support. This site is amazing 
but I got through it. I only have 6 more nights of that to get through. My chosen drink tonight was soda water. I struggled through the conversations and if I am totally honest found myself very board and having an internal pity party for one. However and it is a big however, I know that I will sleep well tonight and wake up not hating myself in the morning. Thank you everyone for your much needed support. This site is amazing Member
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Gulf Coast, USA
Posts: 2,229
Great job on making it through the evening Jackandbess2!
You can do this. After a hard fought 9 months sober last year, I caved thinking I could have "just a few" drinks here and there.
I couldn't have been more wrong. i'm back at day 36 today and forgot what a struggle the early days are.
You don't want to have to start this battle all over again. 6 months is a huge accomplishment.
Drinking won't add anything positive to your vacation and most likely would ruin your experience.
Stay strong!
You can do this. After a hard fought 9 months sober last year, I caved thinking I could have "just a few" drinks here and there.
I couldn't have been more wrong. i'm back at day 36 today and forgot what a struggle the early days are.
You don't want to have to start this battle all over again. 6 months is a huge accomplishment.
Drinking won't add anything positive to your vacation and most likely would ruin your experience.
Stay strong!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
Jackandbess - We're proud of you for getting over that hurdle. I remember how resentful I was in the beginning, but those feelings left. It is so good to be free of it. You'll wake up clear headed and pleased with yourself. You can do this, we know it!
Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 232
you're doing great!! A word of caution for you from my own personal experience...after 2 years of sobriety I picked up that first drink again and didn't put it back down for another 2 years... big ugly relapse and starting over again is even harder than before. its so not worth it.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2014
Posts: 7
I know I'm new to all this forum stuff and you don't even know me so why would you listen to me right?...but one line just jumped out at me, and that was the one about you may be able to control it now. This is why I've joined this group...because I thought the same...that is it in a nutshell...and I feel a complete waste of space as a result...I don't need to say anything else really.
By the sounds of what your friends are saying you have done so very well and should be more than proud of yourself, you can keep it up, even if it takes looking at these messages every now and again during your stay to keep you going...find the things that work to keep you going and use them...and take care
Cleo x
By the sounds of what your friends are saying you have done so very well and should be more than proud of yourself, you can keep it up, even if it takes looking at these messages every now and again during your stay to keep you going...find the things that work to keep you going and use them...and take care
Cleo x
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 8
Great job Jackandbess2, I truly give you props for staying sober on vacation. To-date, I have not been able to do that. My non-cocktail of choice currently is tonic with lime, and mint. Looks and tastes like a cocktail, and everyone thinks you are cocktailing, so you don't get all questions! Give it a try, as it's so much more tasty than soda water!!! Keep it up!
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: California
Posts: 2,693
Great job JackandBess!
All of the "firsts" are so very challenging. I'm not sure if this is your first holiday since getting sober but once you get through this week the next one will be much easier. I didn't know if I could go to a concert and not drink but I did and I know the next one will be easier. I can also relate about struggling to get into the conversations while sober. I think we need to practice and get used to it. I am sure conversations will be even more enjoyable in the future. Great job!
All of the "firsts" are so very challenging. I'm not sure if this is your first holiday since getting sober but once you get through this week the next one will be much easier. I didn't know if I could go to a concert and not drink but I did and I know the next one will be easier. I can also relate about struggling to get into the conversations while sober. I think we need to practice and get used to it. I am sure conversations will be even more enjoyable in the future. Great job!
Community Greeter
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 51,526
I agree with Melinda about the 'firsts'. The first holiday season, birthday, vacation, etc. Getting through that first calendar year is challenging at times, but everything gets easier when you prove to yourself there is life after alcohol.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Hand in the mini-bar key at the front desk. Ask the server to remove the wine glasses from the table. When I went to a fine French restaurant (with a sommelier and everything), there were three wine glasses on the table. I had her remove them--and then the AV vanished.
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: London
Posts: 71
There are small spirit bottles and a full open mini bar in our room and when we go down for dinner, a seven course dinner, there are several wine glasses on the table with the finest of wines on offer. I am trying to hit the problem head on and face my fears and associations with alcohol. I want to run away from it and I want to put away anything to do with drinking alcohol but I know that in my line of work it is always going to be right under my nose. I can't run from this one. I made a point of defiantly telling the waiter last night to please stop offering me wine as I do not drink alcohol. He looked at me as if I was an alien as did the other diners, In fact one lady actually sniggered. I made more of an effort to get in to the conversation and found the experience less boring than I have done on the previous evenings. Half way through the dinner the unexpected entertainment came in the form of a very beautiful woman, dressed to the nines, looking somewhat disheveled now and somewhat embarrassed after knocking over her full glass of wine with the glass shattering all over the floor. I sat there and thought how wonderful it is to be sober and not to be that woman that everyone will be talking about the next morning over breakfast, the one that had too many the night before and embarrassed herself.
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