petals

First day of my holidays and apartment owners have left bottle of chardonnay for us.... I was in the process of putting it in the kids room away from temptation to give as a gift when hubby took it from me and put it in the fridge. ..... he wants it with his beer tonight to get drunk..... I tried to explain. ......but no use......I only want a bit of support. ..... its my absolute favourite drink. ... how am I gonna get through this evening.....eight long hours. ......what an awful start to the holidays. ..... came straight on here......thank goodness for you guys .....and at least I've got Internet. ....

Altoids

Just remember that the stuff in that bottle is POISON!!! It really sucks that you don't have support in your own home. It really does. Sorry you are dealing with that. Glad you are here.

PurpleKnight

Hey Petals, leave it to your husband to drink, but be clear to him that you're not having any, you're a non drinker now!!

You can do this!! SR is in your corner!!

IOAA2

Hi. If it were me I’d spend the evening with friends who don’t drink, lets say a meeting or 2. I was taught to go to any length to not drink. This is for your life and all other reasons come second. Tough I know but we need to reprogram ourselves and our thinking.

BE WELL

SandyLovesFall

I'm new but I know what it feels like because my hubby drinks beer which was my poison too. I can tolerate him drinking because he doesn't try and get me to drink too (yet). At any rate, this is your sobriety and in order for you to have a wonderful holidays and life you cannot even think about the wine. Let your hubby drink it and when he acts a fool after drinking it remember how good you will feel in the morning while he's probably nursing a hangover.

Angel1555

I hope you made it through the evening petals. Did you have an alternative drink on hand or perhaps some ice cream? Last night when my husband was having his wine I really wanted some icecream. I had already had two peach fizzy sodas in the afternoon. I had also had two AF beers earlier on the deck when my neighbors were having a glass of wine with us. We didn't have any ice cream and I had reached my calorie count for the day so I finally relented and just had nothing. But I coped. Sending support your way.

Inchworm

Let us know how you managed, okay? I'm pulling for you. My husband drinks still, too, but seems to be able moderate. Not me.

Anna

Why don't you make a plan to go out on your own? Is there some evening sight-seeing you could do, or do you know anyone in the area? Failing that, get a good book or movie and immerse yourself.

Fly N Buy

So, I do not judge - but there is no way I could drink NA beer! Perhaps others with more sobriety than I can or do. But, as new as I am to being sober - I humbly suggest IF YOU ARE ALSO NEW, perhaps do not consider this.

There is still alcohol in NA beer where I live and to me it is a bad reminder and could be a trigger.

Again, NO OFFENSE TOWARDS ANYONE ELSE!

HeadLump

Ah, petals I'm so sorry your holiday's started like this. Let your husband drink the wine. All of it. Once it's gone, it's gone and you will have passed a very hard test And hide the painkillers tomorrow morning

((((petals)))))

Angel1555

Hi Flyn, I kind of thought that my NA beer would be a bad idea for many. But I have been drinking it along with my wine when I was cutting back. It just isn't a trigger for me. Maybe it's because I have never been a beer drinker so I don't associate it with getting a buzz on. For me, it's like an alternative to iced tea or a soda, without all of the sugar. I don't recommend them to anyone who is trying to quit drinking for sure. Just works for me.

Fly N Buy

Cunning, baffling and powerful....

I am sure you know your own body - who knows, down the road I may change my mind.
I usually do as I am impulsive, and child like as I am a real alkeyholic! Greatly respect you and your opinions. THAT is what recovery and this site are all about~~~~~

Cheli

I can totally relate. My husband is still a drinker too and still drinks in front of me and leaves one unfinished open bottle of beer. Drives me crazy. I try not to let it temp me. You need to do the same. I try to keep my distance from my husband when he is drinking. Maybe this will help you too. Try to stay busy, that seems to help me. Do things with your kids or go out for a walk or treat yourself to something you like. You can also drink a non-alcoholic drink that you enjoy if you have to be around him when he drinks. It seems to work for me. I've only been sober 17 days. Good luck and you can definitely do this.

awholenewlife52

Aw, petals, I'm so sorry your hubby isn't more supportive.

You can so do this, though. We're all here to support you.

Is there any nice food that you could have as a treat, maybe a takeaway or something? Or as MindfulLiving said, ice cream? Or anything that you really enjoy?

Just really keep in mind too how great you will feel in the morning with no hangover. That's a much better start to your holidays than waking up feeling awful tomorrow.

You can do this! Stick with us here, we've got your back.

petals

Thanks guys, well ive come to bed early.... had pepsi max! He hasn't opened the wine......good but its still in the fridge.... tho he has hit the beer pretty big..... aw noooo he's even brought it to bed.....
Will try to go to sleep....and try to not think about the fridge night all
Xx

PurpleKnight

Hang in there petals!!

His drinking is HIS drinking and your Sobriety is YOUR Sobriety, try to separate them out!

You can do this!!

Nuudawn

Aww..petals. So sorry you have the added challenge to your sobriety. Crikey...it's even in bed with you (I mean the drink he's brought..not he himself). I admire and respect you for facing this...huge.
I also admire you're restraint. I am pretty sure my willful self would get angry and pour that crap down the sink. So what if it's there for him. Why is it better in you than down the drain? I would get pretty selfish in this instance. I'd get rid of it and give him the $10 bucks or whatever if you feel you are "taking" something from him.

But hey, my attitude is probably why I'm single : )

Sage22

I too am sorry you don't have more support at home (or on holiday). Hang in there! You are doing great! That's a big challenge.
Thinking bout you.

Kris47

Petals, A big hug for you............

You'll get through this as long as you remember that keeping sober is the most important thing in your life. Sad that you have additional challenges to consider but you can do this. Keep up the good work and remember we're all here for you!

Dee74

I'm glad you're getting through it petals
D