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New here and looking to kick the habit...

Old 08-07-2014, 04:13 AM
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New here and looking to kick the habit...

Hi guys.... Just found this place today and seems a great place with loads of info...
Basically I'm a 37 yr old guy living in UK..
Been drinking excessively for around 14 months now...
Basically at least half a bottle of vodka EVERY night... Some nights it's more and at the weekend it's definitely more....
Don't drink in the morning or get shakes but usually led in bed until 11 or 12 most days and have to bring myself back to reality with energy drinks and coffee just to function..... Every day I tell myself I'm sick of this existence and that tonight I won't drink but by early evening I'm refreshed or had a busy day at work and before I know it I've justified it in my head or say I'll stop tomorrow instead. I'm one of the most positive people you could meet generally and the internal dialogue of self motivation I give myself everyday would get anybody fired up to make a change but by the end of every day it's all gone down the pan and I'm sat up alone drunk again.....
This is driving me mental.....!!

Last edited by Kubis8; 08-07-2014 at 04:14 AM. Reason: Correction
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Old 08-07-2014, 05:09 AM
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Hi and welcome.
If it makes you feel any better your far from being alone with your feelings.
The requirements to get AND stay sober are not that many. First we don’t pick up that first drink so we don’t have to try to get sober AGAIN. Then we get honest with our self about our own drinking. Next we accept without question that if we are alcoholic we can not drink in safety. Somewhere in there we add that we really don’t want to drink.
I personally got very into AA to get and stay sober for a long tike.
Reading and doing suggestions posted on this forum is a great help also, along with changing our drinking routines as well.

BE WELL
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Old 08-07-2014, 05:16 AM
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Hi and welcome Kubis8

Posting and reading here regularly really helped focus me...and seeing my story written b y others again and again help stop me from rationalising that I wasn't so bad...

SR helped me turn my life around - I know we can help you too

D
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Old 08-07-2014, 05:24 AM
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Welcome to the support familly Kubis.
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Old 08-07-2014, 05:28 AM
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I really relate to your post. I also consider myself a positive person. I also would wake up every morning and say "enough! That is it, I will never drink again, never ever ever ever!" and then by sunset I was right back at it.
I also went through a period of heavy drinking where I said "oh, well I don't drink during the day or in the morning" or "I never get the shakes" "I never miss any of my obligations- work, family or otherwise"
Then, all of the sudden, things started slipping really fast. The change occurred slowly, but once it was in motion I was going down hill fast. I started drinking in the afternoon, then at lunchtime, then, ah what the hell, I've got to get cigarettes, I'll just have a quick glass of wine... at 10am. Then I woke up so hungover that the only thing that I thought might help would be more alcohol, so I had a quick nip at 8am.
The shakes appeared. I started messing up my work big time. I work from home and stuff really started to get messy. How could it not, I was drunk form morning to night. I had that sonogram of my liver that I had been putting off, yep, the start of liver damage.
I'm 9 days sober now. The longest I've been in I couldn't tell you how long. But this time it is no joke, I'm not going back.
There is no avoiding the first days and the withdrawl. No avoiding it. Picking another day won't let you skip it. Waiting until you have time off work to rest won't let you skip it. Cutting down and tapering won't let you skip it. You just have to stop. Today. Don't go for that vodka. Don't do it or you'll just have to do your first day all over again.
No doubt, the first days suck. But once you've done'em, you've done'em and you can get on with your sober life feeling a whole lot better- physically, mentally and emotionally.

Be strong, stay sober.
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Old 08-07-2014, 07:30 AM
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welcome Kubis8, glad you found your way to the forum
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Old 08-07-2014, 07:40 AM
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Thanks for such a warm welcome, Im gonna take some time after work tonight to dig through the forums and read as much as possible. Feels good to be amongst people who I can finally open up to and know the score....
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Old 08-07-2014, 07:52 AM
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Welcome. You are not alone. This is a great group with lots of support.
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Old 08-07-2014, 07:57 AM
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Welcome, Kubis8!

This is a great place to read and learn. It helped me immensely when I stopped drinking.

I can relate to your story 100%. Add in a little driving under the influence and shopping at ten different stores so the clerks wouldn't know how much I drank, the 10PM recycling bin trips so my neighbors wouldn't know, the avoidance of phone calls and people so they wouldn't see me impaired, the many different moderation tricks I tried, the depression and anxiety, and you've described me at the end.
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Old 08-07-2014, 08:09 AM
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Welcome to the family. I know you'll find lots of support here.
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Old 08-07-2014, 10:25 AM
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Welcome to the Forum Kubis!! Great to have you here!!
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Old 08-07-2014, 10:29 AM
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Welcome. This is a great place to start.
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Old 08-07-2014, 10:31 AM
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Hi im new here too. Welcome
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:21 PM
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Do you guys think me just quitting like this, after a over a year drinking vodka will be safe... I've heard of others who drank maybe a litre a day for 2 or 3 years just went cold turkey and although it wasn't pleasant they where okay overall... Wanna be safe
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:29 PM
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I don't think any of us can answer that. If in doubt go to the ER, they can evaluate the situation medically.

Each of our bodies are different. Even if we told you our own intakes, habits, etc I think it depends on a lot if factors that only a doctor could address. Do not use that as an excuse. I did for over a year "oh, it's not safe to stop at this point". I did eventually quit cold turkey, but I had seen a number of different doctors recently for a number of different checks. Get to a doctor, you need to quit. Good luck!
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Old 08-07-2014, 02:34 PM
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Hi Kubis. Welcome to SR.

I identify with pretty much everything you have written in your post. I'm a similar age, also in the UK. I was drinking for a similar time, similar levels. Always starting late afternoon and then finding ways to drink alone. I was so powerful when drinking alone in my living room and always made my best plans to not drink tomorrow in my living room. I had amazing plans until mid afternoon most afternoons until I ended up back in the cycle.

Now add in trouble at work, a broken relationship and a realisation I have virtually no friends left all in the space of a weeks bender when the drinking cycles joined up, you have described me on Sunday morning last.

It's tough but you can do this. I'm five days in, starting to feel better already. Ready to start fighting the fight.

Lots of support and advice on here.
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Old 08-07-2014, 03:35 PM
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It's good to meet you Kubis.

SR helped me stop when I'd been drinking all day for years. Not being alone anymore meant everything to me. I could come here at all hours and find support & understanding.

Welcome - you can do this.
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Old 08-07-2014, 03:40 PM
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I hear you guys..... Thing is I'm Also at a crossroads in my life.... Been with my partner for just over 7 years and 2 weeks ago we had a massive head to head and basically she told me we aren't the same anymore and it's pretty much over.... I will be clear though, this has nothing to do with my drinking, and I'm genuinely not just saying that... We genuinely have ran our course and we've talked and there's no anamosity and I'm still living here albeit in the spare room..... As such it would be unfair at this point to put my personal problems on her or ask her for help. I have always had a very addictive personality, I was seriously addicted to a drug called GBL for over 4 years which led to me being hospitalised for 2 weeks on massive amounts of benzos then a further 4 weeks residential in a rehab clinic to get me off the benzos they pumped me with..... She was by my side through it all, I almost died and she was there constantly...... My best freind died at 24 from the same stuff..... To be fair we didn't even know it was addictive or dangerous.... We only took it cos it was widely used within body building circles and was totally legal..... How wrong we were.....
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Old 08-07-2014, 03:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Kubis8 View Post
Do you guys think me just quitting like this, after a over a year drinking vodka will be safe... I've heard of others who drank maybe a litre a day for 2 or 3 years just went cold turkey and although it wasn't pleasant they where okay overall... Wanna be safe
We can't give you medical advice anyway, but even if we could, no one can really give you a guarantee cos we're all different.

Some are fine with no apparent ill effects - others get into real trouble.

The safest option is to seek the advice of a Dr

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Old 08-08-2014, 12:13 AM
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Kubis, I could just let all this pass by as, to be perfectly honest, you don't sound very convinced. But something in your posts connected with me and I feel the need to write.

And this is crazy, because as an alcoholic myself I know that no one, no one, NO one, especially not some random stranger off the internet, can make you change unless you are ready to. But you have GOT to look at this for what it is. I won't tell you to stop because the only words that matter are those coming form inside you. Please though, take some time today to take a good, hard look at what you are doing. Re-read my post. I "wasn't that bad" either. Had my sh*t totally under control. I just happened to drink 2 bottles of wine a night. But nah, no problems. I worked out a lot, ate right, took my vitamins. No big deal. Let me tell you, something shifted, slowly, slowly so that I didn't really notice. And then, all of the sudden, BAM, I was sailing downhill and could not catch myself to stop. Doing all the things I said I'd never do- and you say you don't do- morning drinking, day drinking, shaking hands, liver damage, missing work and family obligations, not to mention the fact that I looked right sh*t.
So your girl broke up with you. That SUCKS. I am truly sorry and I know that the pain and confusion must be immense. Will drinking make it better? No. It will make it worse.
There is no "ideal" time to quit. There will always be an excuse if you look for it, always. A move, a break up, a new job, a death, a wedding, a birthday, a vacation, a fight, a tuesday night with nothing better to do, sunday brunch, just whatever, don't feel like quitting today.....
Get to your doctor. We can't help you with whether or not cold-turkey will be safe for you, your doctor can. Please, from one positive person to another, (I would say from one alcoholic to another but you have not labeled yourself as that and only you can admit that) get yourself together. You can DO THIS. You can. Come on!
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