Relapses
Administrator
Thread Starter
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,373
Relapses
Seems to be a lot of relapse talk in the air right now.
The worst thing I ever did was to get used to relapsing.
I told myself that I learned from it - but I kept drinking, so I didn't learn from it....
I told myself one night off won't hurt/will be good for me.
It wasn't - because it was never just one night.
I told myself that **** happens. That kind of passiveness nearly killed me.
I don't want anyone to feel bad about relapsing - I know I felt bad enough...I didn't need to get beaten up more.
But I don't want people to underestimate relapse either.
It's really really easy to be swallowed up and lost for days, weeks, months, even years.
Don't get used to them and don't get comfortable.
Fight for yourself - you're worth it.
Ask for help - you'll find it here
D
The worst thing I ever did was to get used to relapsing.
I told myself that I learned from it - but I kept drinking, so I didn't learn from it....
I told myself one night off won't hurt/will be good for me.
It wasn't - because it was never just one night.
I told myself that **** happens. That kind of passiveness nearly killed me.
I don't want anyone to feel bad about relapsing - I know I felt bad enough...I didn't need to get beaten up more.
But I don't want people to underestimate relapse either.
It's really really easy to be swallowed up and lost for days, weeks, months, even years.
Don't get used to them and don't get comfortable.
Fight for yourself - you're worth it.
Ask for help - you'll find it here
D
Member
Join Date: Jul 2011
Posts: 1,462
Thank you Dee. This is exactly what I needed to hear right now. Thank you thank you thank you. It's so easy to believe our addiction and fall back into our old ways, slowly but surely. I know that every time I have FOUGHT that voice, I came out stronger and wiser. What I have learned here on
SR is to keep fighting that voice and getting stronger. Sobriety IS worth it, it IS important but it won't come easy.
Thank you so much for this gentle, yet powerful reminder.
SR is to keep fighting that voice and getting stronger. Sobriety IS worth it, it IS important but it won't come easy.
Thank you so much for this gentle, yet powerful reminder.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: London, Uk
Posts: 1,694
Thank you Dee74. A great post and so true. There cannot be an endless cycle of relapse - One night won't hurt, I have been telling myself exactly the same since Easter this year. Now I have to grab this and take control.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Australia
Posts: 340
I have noticed this also. I have been lurking here a fair bit lately.
Yes it is very easy to confuse a period of abstinence for control.
Also very easy to start romanticising the old days and tell yourself it wasn't that bad.
A lot of the relapses look to come from people who seem aware they are experiencing some level of drinking problem but havn't reached a certain stereotypical low. The door is left ajar to the fact that maybe they aren't that bad after all. Some months of sobriety and seeing friends control their drinking and doubt creeps in, I can relate to this.
The hardest thing I have ever done in my life is get out ahead of the curve, hell maybe I could have gotten another couple years drinking in before hitting skid row. That is sooo attractive to my AV, lets get a bit more drinking in, no worries, and then quit a bit nearer to our bottom, we can have the best of both worlds.
Possible? you bet. Also possible I would kill someone or devastate my family by my drunken actions. The fact I got this far intact really is just pure luck and the lower down I chase that curve I believe the higher the probability of bad stuff happening.
I would hate to look back in 20 years and think if only I had continued I wouldn't have lost my job, family, self respect that I regained during sobriety. Because it was unravelling like a train crash in slow motion.
I really encourage anyone on the fence to make a change for the better I don't think you will regret it in the long run. There are people hiding in the shadow of these forums that don't post much but are there supporting you.
Yes it is very easy to confuse a period of abstinence for control.
Also very easy to start romanticising the old days and tell yourself it wasn't that bad.
A lot of the relapses look to come from people who seem aware they are experiencing some level of drinking problem but havn't reached a certain stereotypical low. The door is left ajar to the fact that maybe they aren't that bad after all. Some months of sobriety and seeing friends control their drinking and doubt creeps in, I can relate to this.
The hardest thing I have ever done in my life is get out ahead of the curve, hell maybe I could have gotten another couple years drinking in before hitting skid row. That is sooo attractive to my AV, lets get a bit more drinking in, no worries, and then quit a bit nearer to our bottom, we can have the best of both worlds.
Possible? you bet. Also possible I would kill someone or devastate my family by my drunken actions. The fact I got this far intact really is just pure luck and the lower down I chase that curve I believe the higher the probability of bad stuff happening.
I would hate to look back in 20 years and think if only I had continued I wouldn't have lost my job, family, self respect that I regained during sobriety. Because it was unravelling like a train crash in slow motion.
I really encourage anyone on the fence to make a change for the better I don't think you will regret it in the long run. There are people hiding in the shadow of these forums that don't post much but are there supporting you.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 301
Thank you for this D. I have been lurking for a few weeks now and was about to post about relapse (after a couple weeks sober), but I will save the story and just say hello again. Day 2 today...looking forward to getting more involved here...it does help me.
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 301
Originally Posted by Dee74 
I don't want to stop anyone from posting SoberD.
Just the opposite
SR is a great resource - I want folks to use it
D
Just the opposite
SR is a great resource - I want folks to use it
D
I went back and read some of my old threads and its been about a year now...good to be back
Recovering
Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Melbourne
Posts: 99
Your spot on Dee! I give in for one night thinking well its been 5 days without a drink! or I deserve a night to myself and then I spend the next 2 - 3 days in a slump feeling down and recovering.
Currently Active Users Viewing this Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
