twoboys

... I'm about to fall off my wagon. I had a rotten day, and I worked hard outside and inside and that wine cooler would go down soooo smoothly. I don't want to get drunk, but I'm feeling like if I just had one, I'd be okay. I'd have it, get it over with, and be back here before anybody even posted a reply.

Wait a minute, it's coming back to me now. I never have just one. And I don't drink because I'm thirsty. And after I've had the drink my kids would be just as cranky and the dishes still wouldn't have done themselves ... again! And I'd pour myself another one.

So maybe, just maybe this time, I'll have a glass of tonic (I'm a New Englander, who else knows what that is?), read some more messages, then go do the dishes. Before I know it, this rotten day will be over, my kids will be asleep, and the British comedies will be on NH public television. Ah, life is good again.

Now I remember why I come here! Thanks folks!!

Take good care of yourselves and have a GREAT WEEKEND!!

In memory of miracle

I am sorry you are havin a tough time . Sounds like you could use a little me time.The voice of this disease is very sneaky isint it ? Sounds like you have answered your own question . Hang in there ! This to shall pass and you and those two boys will be so much better off ... Trish

twoboys

Those boys WILL be better off with a sober mother, won't they?

I spend half my time thinking I want to get sober for myself, and the other half thinking I need to get sober for them. I guess it doesn't really matter in the long run as long as I get ... and stay ... sober.

Gotta log off now and rid our garage of one fat racoon tennant - he found the birdseed smorgasbord. If he posted to the gratitude list he'd probably be thankful for opposable thumbs, because he was able to unscrew a big plastic jar lid to get at the birdseed!

Dan

Any day, hour, minute or second of the week.
One day at a time.
Even the rotten ones.

ted

THE BAD THING IS WHEN I FELL OFF THE WAGON IT RAN ME DOWN!
GLAD YOU CAME TO A REALAZATION THAT A DRINK ONLY MAKES A BAD DAY WORSE.
GOD BLESS YOU AND YOURS.........ted

twoboys

Especially the rotten ones!

Dan

You know it! You need to surround yourself with support in the early going.
Very important.

Gooch

With that sense of humor and ability to see the better choice I believe you have the tools to stay sober just for today.

i'm still grinning seeing a racoon making a gratitude post.

Rowan

Hi Twoboys
I enjoyed reading your post, and the way you thought aloud as you shared your thought process in order to 'Think Think Think' your way out of that drink Good for you! And thanks for teaching me something; I didn't know that raccoons had opposable thumbs - I wish I had those - I could use some help opening a few jars myself
God Bless
Love Rowan

kckman

twoboys you may have had a rotten day but if you would have listened to that little voice chances are you would have made it that much worse. instead of having a drink you listened to your voice of reason. give youself a pat on the back. i hope your tomorrow will be a better today.

Alice Wonder

((((twoboys)))) i am glad you made it through. i like sparkling mineral water in nice glassware... ooh and one of those tiny umbrellas! and i love racoons even though they are rotten sometimes! your post was inspiring yay! i didn't know racoons liked birdseed. love-alice

JaySee

Hi TwoBoys

Well done on working that one through. For me a drink changes a very grey area into a very dark hole in minutes. Well done. Save that moment, slip it in the memory banks.

We don't have racoons over here, they always seem so cute to me, but I bet they can be buggers

much love

JC

twoboys

Off topic, but FYI racoons don't just like birdseed. I have a photo of one eating a bowl of doritos my kids left out one night; and (I swear this is true) they got into containers of USED MOTOR OIL that we're storing til hazmat recycling day. What a mess. (But you know what, I think they're cute, too!)

I appreciate all who have posted. It is important that we listen to that voice of reason, which is so often outbellowed by our desires-du-jour. As long as today is not yesterday, I'm a little safer. After all, I'm further along in my recovery, aren't I? Thanks so much for your help. I know I couldn't do this alone.

Chy

I'm sorry that's just too funny! But I just wanted to add more hugs and support. Your children need you, and will love you alway's. This I do know!