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my drinking is out of control

Old 08-03-2014, 03:38 PM
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my drinking is out of control

I feel so desperate, my drinking is now having an dreadful impact on my children, the last few days I have said the most hurtful things to my 11 yr old son. He deserves so much more.

As much as I want to change and know I should before it's to late, I'm not sure if I want it enough if it means I have to quit drinking

How awful that sounds but it is the truth of the matter.
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:41 PM
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Welcome MaggieLou - it's so good to meet you.

I felt the same way when I finally admitted I was out of control. I knew what had to happen, but I was so afraid to let go of it. I hope talking to us here will help. It relieved my anxiety to know I was among friends who understood. I found the courage to stop destroying myself and my relationships.

Glad you found us - keep reading and posting.
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:42 PM
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Welcome to the Forum MaggieLou!!

Is having a drink seriously more important than your children??

If alcohol is affecting your life, then it's time then it's gonna mean making a few changes to your drinking!!

You'll find loads of support here on SR!!
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:46 PM
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I hope the support here can help you stop drinking for good.
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:46 PM
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Originally Posted by yarrak View Post
Why the fk u said bad thinvs to 11 yo child. Idiotic ppl must be protected to make child.
Yarrak you are out of line. Read the forum rules.
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:47 PM
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Hi MaggieLou ~ Glad you are here. You will find a ton of wisdom, love, support and encouragement here at SR. Hang around and chat with us.
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted by yarrak View Post
I think grovnment must take those child from you idiotic bastard
You will be kicked out if you keep insulting people. Read the rules at one
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:52 PM
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Heeeey fellow welshie, welcome :-) you will find a TON of support here!
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:54 PM
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Yarrak you can't say anything to make me feel any worse than I do!
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:57 PM
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welcome

sadly for me and my ex wife we ended up losing our 2 younest kids to social services as our drinking had progressed to a point where we were drinking daily, kids not going to school as we would be in bed sleeping it off fights between me and her happening more often the police getting called out, etc, it was a total mad house in the end

you can bet i felt so sorry for myself when i my kids got taken away, i was so sorry for myself i needed a drink
i was a danger to my kids trying to take them back away from the social services in my drunken attempts at kidnapping them

i wanted my kids back and my nightmare world to stop but i just couldnt get off the drink

not until i finally lost it all and had nothing left in the world other than a flat that was given to me by a hostel

i then went to aa and the rest is history
i found a way to live without the need for a drink, in time i was to get my kids back and be a single parent to my kids
i got a job, got some money coming in again, got a car, you name it i got it all back
apart from the ex wife
she sadly is still out there drinking and the kids dont have anything to do with her anymore they have simply given up

i hope you can find a way out of the mess your in before it gets worse, as it will only get worse never better.
aa helped me and still does today thats 10 years ago since my last drink and i have been through so much the last few years being sober but i still never wanted a drink thanks to the love and help i got in aa and still get today

so it might be an option you might think about ?
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:58 PM
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Originally Posted by MaggieLou View Post
Yarrak you can't say anything to make me feel any worse than I do!
MaggieLou please ignore this member, it is not a reflection of what SR is all about. Our friend Dee will pop in soon and clean the air.

Glad you are here new friend ;-)
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Old 08-03-2014, 03:58 PM
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Maggie ignore yarrek, so VERY proud of you for coming here for help we are in this fight together! Day by day you can get well and recover and start a new life :-)
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:03 PM
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if alcoholic -- best to stop drinking

Originally Posted by MaggieLou View Post

I have said the most hurtful things to my 11 yr old son. He deserves so much more.
as we alcoholics grow older we look back to these moments in time
and are amazed
that we chose alcohol over loved ones

these guilt feelings play hard on our hearts later on in life (oh how I know that)
and our children will not forget (I was recently reminded by my daughter)

if alcoholic -- best to stop drinking as soon as possible

please take notice
the writing is on the wall
we just need to read, understand and act

MM
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:04 PM
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Welcome Mag!
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:06 PM
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I would like to thank you all for your kind words but feel I need to explain my actions.

I am disgusted with my behaviour towards my son, I over reacted a few times when he gives me his back chat and it was all petty trying to make sure I had the last say.

I'm the parent and should know better, I told him he was horrible and a spiteful boy because the way he treats his sister and I can't cope with him anymore. Seeing him fight the tears makes my gut wrench.

Had I not been suffering a hang over I'm sure I would have dealt with it a whole lot different.
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:09 PM
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Maggie, I've done shameful & out-of-character things while drinking. That's why you're here, to make a change. Things don't have to stay this way. Give yourself some credit for reaching out for help - you can have a whole new beginning.
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:10 PM
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Well Maggie you don't EVER have to have a hangover again :-)
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:14 PM
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. . . and you know, when you are feeling a bit better and things are calmer, you can have a nice talk with you son. Apologize to him. He may not wanna talk, but he will hear you and learn that sometimes we make mistakes and that we need to own up to them. So glad you are here.
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:16 PM
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Welcome MaggieLou. I think many of us can relate. How is your son now? It's never too late to have a chat and smooth things over if you can ... apologize and let him know you were having a bad day and you took it out on him in your words... and a hug. ...... Great to meet you. Now is the time to make your plan for sobriety and happiness. You can do this!!!!
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Old 08-03-2014, 04:24 PM
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Welcome, MaggieLou. You made a good first step coming here. If you can manage to not pick up another drink, you will find some amazing changes happening pretty quickly. Not picking up sounds so simple, but I know it's not- but try. Try really hard. Once you commit to sobriety, the road gets clearer, and the trip a little less bumpy. We are here for you, wishing you all the best.

Lisa.
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