MasterSkywalker

my life is boring... im sorry... I suffer from extreme anxiety, like agoraphobia... I don't like to leave the house and I don't like being around people... its been that way for 40 years since I was a child... it wont go away with pills and therapy... im doomed to die alone...

Chilledice

I have a phobia of people aswell, I know what its like to not go out of the house because of the sheer terror that awaits, but do you REALLY wanna die on your couch from liver disease? Surely there are other ways to give you some comfort?

EndGameNYC

I grew up in a home that emphasized both education and sports. My father and uncles were NY Giants and NY Yankees fan. My grandfather, a native Newfoundlander, was a fisherman, an expert skater and loved the NY Rangers.

I grew up loving all these sports and teams, and my two brothers and I were are athletes throughout high school in schools with winning teams. I played college hoops my first year, but realized I wasn't going much further than that, and chose to focus on partying and my studies instead.

As I've gotten older, I've learned to appreciate more my personal and social pursuits than watching football during the football season. I don't need to arrange my schedule around "the game." I don't need to watch every game the Giants play, nor do I want to spend three hours or more every Sunday watching their games. Sometimes I'll record the games and fast-forward through them, or otherwise avoid the TV ads. I'll watch the "big games" from start to finish, but I often find pleasure in doing other things.

I never liked watching Giants games while drinking with other drinkers, and I've never been comfortable around hardcore or "diehard" fans who live and die with their teams. Acting like a dick because you're attached to your favorite team is no different for me than acting like a dick in any other context. (I'm referring here specifically to loud and obnoxious fans, and those who seem to believe that picking a fight with someone who likes an opposing team is part of the deal that comes with being a fan.) Each of us has a limited amount of energy and emotions to invest in people and things, and I'd rather invest elsewhere.

For me, watching the Giants games was more about drinking all day than it was about enjoying the games. And just as is true of all things I did as a backdrop to my drinking, I'm no longer as interested as I once was.

Even though I spend a lot less time watching sports now compared to when I was drinking, I enjoy what I'm watching much more than previously. If balance is an important element in living a better life, then I must be doing something right.

End Note: A friend directed me to YouTube to watch videos of Packers' fans after each of their last two losses to the Giants in the NFL Playoffs. I haven't watched similar videos after other teams have lost, but what I saw was suicidal, drunken messes from people who seemed to believe that life was no longer worth living following the Packers' losses.

Hevyn

MasterSkywalker - Whatever you decide, I hope you'll keep posting. Many here care what happens to you & don't want you to isolate. Drinking isn't going to solve your loneliness and boredom - as you already know. Everything ends up even more miserable after the brief numbness wears off. Drinking isn't your answer.

PurpleKnight

MS if nothing changes, then nothing changes, what advice can we give otherwise?!!

You must go out at some stage to buy alcohol surely, so why is that acceptable and possible but not go for a simple walk in a park or around the block? just something to maybe cause some interaction with others.

Little things MS, you're settling for something before even trying to see if things could change!!

ScottFromWI

Only if you choose to be. You are reaching out for help here which tells me that something inside you makes the above statement false. There is help for what ails you if you choose to seek and accept it.

soberjuly

I personally don't like drinking alcohol in the hot sun and then maybe I'm weird but I always look at the athletics and think about what great shape they are in and how they probably rarely drink.