31 and recovering in a family of them
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Hobart,Indiana
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31 and recovering in a family of them
Hello, my name is Monica Yanez.I am 31 years old and I am a recovering alcoholic. I have been drinking since the age of 8years old. I grew up in a house full of people and lived without much rules/guidance. About 6years ago to this date I lost my best friend and my baby brother. It was shortly after his loss that I began to look at everything differently. You know how some people say they see life in a different light. No , that is not the case for me. I still see everything as I once seen it- those things haven't left and those people are still doing the same they always have. But now I see-- I really see. There are some thing in life that make you grow and some that make you learn then there are some that make you wake up. I have not touched a drink now in over 2years. Just the thought literally makes me sick to my stomach.I quit COLD TURKEY one day while sitting at my dining room table. It may sound strange but GOD really did come to me while I was sitting there-. In a house full of people talking , while I had a beer in hand ready to drink. I became frozen- I was no longer there in my dining room. I dont know if it was a epiphany or if I really got removed from my body for what seemed like hours and when I came to I looked around and nothing changed, People still in the living room drinking,laughing, the t.v. still on. The windows open with neighbors out, grills going and summer time laughs echoing through my house. But no, I was back but not really. I put down that 1/2 drank beer and walked into the living room. I stood in the middle of everyone- not even sure of what I was doing. It was like it was me, but another force was giving me the strength and giving me words. I began to tell everyone (not preach) that I am DONE with the abuse and the neglect I will no longer allow beer and substance to over come and consume me. They all laughed as they have heard me say I want to quit before. But this was different. I had a total of 5 cases of beer in which I gave away that very same day. I dont know what exactly GOD did to me. But whatever he did to me that day in my dining room helped me gain control of myself. I have power that I have never had and I can foresee things before they happen. I have a sense of nature- I can actually feel the sound of the leaves on the trees and I embrace the smell of the summer time air mixed with everyday hussle and bussle. I know more than ever that life is beautiful and every flower was once a seed and every rain drop was once a cloud and every living being can be an angel. I know my words are all over the board and may not even make sense but they do to me. Maybe one day I can actually sit and write my life down all the hardship and family struggles as well as the good. And maybe I can make it all come together into a nice book for those who are recovering or just need to hear about love,grace,forgiveness,and more. My mind is like a waterfall I have so many words/thoughts that try to push their way out- much like a line that kindergarteners are waiting in as they push and shove to make it to the front. As soon as I have my words ready to be put out more come and then I am left with a bunch of mumbled thoughts that are eager to get out and make sense to someone. So here is aa small sample of me.My thoughts. My life. My story.
Last edited by Memastrole; 07-30-2014 at 10:34 AM. Reason: misspelling
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