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30 and never had a real job

Old 07-28-2014, 05:29 PM
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30 and never had a real job

I just hit 1 year sober

Now all the responsibilities of the world are catching up

I went to college and graduated and never worked there, just considered myself a "full time student" (ha)

When I got out of college I just lived with my parents for the past 7 years drinking alone, never worked a day because of the withdrawals and need for alcohol, lied to my parents saying I was working and got money from selling stuff

Now I'm a year sober and I've finally realized I need to work and turn my life around, it is just terrible, applying for jobs with no work experience, I have dui's as well, if I do get a job the only ones that have called me for interviews are 10 bucks an hour

Can anyone relate? I know the advice is simple just keep at it and stay sober, guess I just need some support, is there any hope?
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:46 PM
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Dont sweat the duis. They are common place. You are on a good track. Remember 10/hr jobs do many times lead to better jobs and/or better pay. Alot of times these jobs are the employers way to weed out people and promote people. Youre going to do just fine. Youll see. Youve already tackled the hardest job, sobriety.
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:46 PM
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Originally Posted by Citrusdrop7408
I just hit 1 year sober

Now all the responsibilities of the world are catching up

I went to college and graduated and never worked there, just considered myself a "full time student" (ha)

When I got out of college I just lived with my parents for the past 7 years drinking alone, never worked a day because of the withdrawals and need for alcohol, lied to my parents saying I was working and got money from selling stuff

Now I'm a year sober and I've finally realized I need to work and turn my life around, it is just terrible, applying for jobs with no work experience, I have dui's as well, if I do get a job the only ones that have called me for interviews are 10 bucks an hour

Can anyone relate? I know the advice is simple just keep at it and stay sober, guess I just need some support, is there any hope?
Hey man, don't be so hard on yourself.......... you say you have 1 year clean?? That's awesome!

I also wouldn't be so hard on myself regarding your unemployment scenario, look man........... the horrible economy is not your fault, it's beyond your control what other greedy people and un-seen forces have created. Millions upon millions of people are struggling just like you, at the very least, be thankful you still have your youth.

That said, 30 years old and never having made any "moves" in life is troubling to say the least, so i would say you are partially to blame for where you are in life - not counting the out-of-our control economic part. Could you provide us with some more details such as?

1. Typical dose of booze per day (ex. X beers, X shots, X glasses of wine)

2. Length of drinking career....... i.e. what age you started and any breaks in between, if any

3. If you even tried to get a job between ages 18 and 30?? I mean the economy is bad, that's a given, but i mean....... it's not SO bad that a person can't at least get a throw-away minimum wage job of some type.

Regarding #3. i've held a number of jobs the last several years, i guess-timate i held about 3 total............ not counting the ones that didn't last. I was also a regular drinker throughout this time-period. It is possible to go to work and then indulge in your booze afterwards, millions of people do so in this country every day. No excuses! You CAN have both, booze and a job.

But again, i don't know the extent of your drinking, so there again some more details would help us (the audience) point you in the right direction

And, welcome!
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:47 PM
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Yes, there is always hope.

Maybe you will have to start with a ten bucks an hour job and try to move up from there. I agree that it's really tough to get started in the workforce without any work experience. Good for you for deciding to change your life.
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:50 PM
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Well I can sorta relate. I also have a bachelors degree but have job gaps because of getting drunk during day when I should have been working. It caught up to me.

If you have too, make up a job you had in the past. What do you have to lose if no one will even give you an interview? Most don't verify anything besides maybe call the "manager" at your previous fake job that just happens to be a friend. Just get your story straight. I had a huge job gap and made up a job on my resume. Be prepared to pass a drug screen. Don't mess with jobs that have you using a company vehicle. They will check your record on that because of their insurance rates.
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:51 PM
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My situation is a little different but I can relate. I did get a pretty good job after graduation and I worked there for about 7 years until my alcoholism pretty much destroyed that career. I was 30 when I resigned before I got fired. My performance reviews were getting worse and worse each quarter. I had to go to the pub at lunchtime each day for a couple pints just to stop my hands from shaking. I was also paranoid and thought I was going to be fired any day. I spent the next 4 years drinking full time and blew through my credit cards, lost my car to DUI, and got evicted from my apartment.

I went to rehab at 34 and have been struggling for the last 3 years to get my life back together. I have been working menial sales jobs because I can't pass a background check. So for the last 7 years, my work history is spotty with large gaps of unemployment. I raise too many red flags for most potential employers and I have had 3 decent job offers pulled after a background check.

I haven't figured out a way out of my hell yet but I know that it will never happen if I do not stay sober. There is always hope. That's all we have right now. You're not alone out there!
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:52 PM
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Welcome! I'd just tell you to take whatever job you can get, to begin with. You can look for better work after you've got some work experience.

Congrats on one year sober!
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Old 07-28-2014, 05:56 PM
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I've worked for pay in some capacity since I was in my early teens, so I can't quite relate to your situation. However, I did return to school in my late 20's, and when I graduated, it was almost like starting out.

Frankly, I believe you need to take whatever job is offered, even if it's just a $10 an hour job stocking shelves. Once you take the job, work it like it's the most important job in the world. You will have to swallow your pride IMO because you need some type of work experience to move forward.

You also have additional options. Your state unemployment office may have a job/counseling center. The school you graduated from should also offer employment assistance and perhaps a chance to intern somewhere. Getting out and networking would be a good idea, maybe volunteering somewhere and meeting people, or attending a church if you're a spiritual person etc.

This can be overcome, but it will take some time, and as I've stated, I feel you will probably have to suck it up for a period of time and work a crappy job. But that's life; I'm sure most of us here have worked some really bad jobs for low pay at one time or another.

And well done on 1 year sober.
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:02 PM
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I completely agree

I should have been able to work and drink, I didn't though, I still don't know why to this day, a mix of 24 beers a night, no motivation, shame, and anxiety

For the first 6 months of my sobriety I was the same, but now a year into my sobriety all my motivation to do something with my is back, and then it's like...wow...but, I'm 30 and I've never worked a day in my life because I pissed it all away drinking and watching netflix alone...and I'm sure a TON of people are worse off than me, it's just so embarrassing to deal with
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:03 PM
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Get the $10 /hour and work hard...move up!! Congrats on the year sober that in itself is fantastic... Good things are coming your way
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:04 PM
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I was drinking 24 a day/night since 18, through college too, and I wasn't the typical college partyer, I had no friends and just drank alone every night

A year ago after a dui and 10 days in jail I realized I needed to stop drinking
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:07 PM
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Hi and welcome citrusdrop
I merged your two threads - less confusing that way, and keep things within our rules

I have a lot of friends who studied through their 20s and then into the real world, so I don't think you're an anomaly.

Like Anna says tho, you may need to lower you sights a little to get a foot in the door, get some money coming in and some experience for the CV

You'll find a lot of support for your recovery here too.

D
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:07 PM
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Yep, like most here are saying, get your feet wet and the rest will follow.
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:12 PM
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Thanks everyone, I just needed a little support, guess I just gotta get any job, get my own place and see where it goes from there
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:23 PM
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Welcome Citrusdrop;

Well done on your sobriety.

I agree with others--take the 10 dollar an hour job and do it well.

I've done everything from waiting tables, managing a kitchen, to picking up hay,
to selling tickets and concessions at a movie theatre, to book store clerk, fast food, training horses, cleaning houses, and so on.

I learned something helpful in life from every one of those work situations
and they helped me grow into my current career.

Dealing with bosses diplomatically, keeping customers happy, getting on with co-workers,
working within schedules you don't always like--all of these are transferable skills for any job.

Keep posting and good luck!
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Old 07-28-2014, 06:24 PM
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Try looking for whatever job you can find - at $10 or whatever - but pick companies where there is advancement opportunity. The mail room in a big corporation, or an entry level job in a manufacturing plant. Pick an industry or kind of business where you'd like one of the higher level jobs, and work toward that.

At McDonald's, there's no place to go. In a corporate mail room, or a sales organization, if you do your job well, no matter what you are paid, and you show you are a dedicated hard worker, that will give you a leg up.

Lots of kids just out of high school and college are still just kids and don't settle down and take responsibility. So being a bit older may be an asset. It's all what you make it.

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Old 07-28-2014, 07:18 PM
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There is absolutely hope. You've already shown you can achieve amazing things with your year of sobriety. You can make this happen, you just have to stay persistently consistent. I'd suggest trying to find resources and people who can help you find employment. GracieLou here on the forum recently suggested temp agencies to me, and I've been looking into them, perhaps start there. Also, I'm in the middle of getting a job too, there's an article that perks me up when I'm feeling down about it: 5 Reasons Life Actually Does Get Better | Cracked.com

Good luck!
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Old 07-28-2014, 07:21 PM
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I know how you feel. I finally completed my first year of full time employment this summer. Just keep applying and do some volunteer work if only a little. You'll fill up on references and get experience. You may need a few months to land a good job, but it will be worth it.
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Old 07-28-2014, 07:36 PM
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I had a job when I got sober at age 31, but you certainly couldn't call what I did "work".

I respect almost anyone who works for a living.

My wife and I no longer have to work, but not working a job is simply not in our DNA.

Welcome to the work force and congrats on a year sober.

I have had most types of jobs one could imagine.

I have cleaned toilets, bathrooms, plates and dishes, cars, hearses, etc.

As a result, I have a lot of respect for people who happily do the jobs many people wouldn't have.
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Old 07-28-2014, 07:41 PM
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Congrats on your year sober!!!!

You can do it, just keep moving forward, baby steps, or big ones, just keep doing the right things!

we are here for you and I am glad you are here!
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