Sure I'm probably one of hundreds...
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by LeTheVerte 
Hi Jules,
If I may, it appears as if you are indirectly, painfully sabotaging your chosen path in life. Is it possible that you could take a little time and steer things in a different, less adrenaline fueled direction? Maybe this could be part of a new plan instead of the same old, same old?
If I may, it appears as if you are indirectly, painfully sabotaging your chosen path in life. Is it possible that you could take a little time and steer things in a different, less adrenaline fueled direction? Maybe this could be part of a new plan instead of the same old, same old?
Stupid line of reasoning.
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: NY, NY
Posts: 32
Yes... I know some vets that are alcoholics or addicts, but the vast majority that I know even who were involved in firefights etc are not! I'm not a vet, so I can't speak on that, but I don't think it is a very good excuse if I go by the ones that I do know. There are better, more adult ways to cope... Some have even been through PTSD groups (in and outpatient). Im not putting you down, but there is a time we all have to deal with things in a more grown up way. This is maybe your time? or not. It is your call and it is your right.
Member
Join Date: Mar 2013
Posts: 6,224
Originally Posted by bukowski
I'm not American so I don't know your parlance
The first thing we all have in common is a problem with addiction so you'll find empathetic friends here.
Sober Alcoholic
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 3,539
I can see why you are having difficulty. So let me cut to the chase.
IMO you are attempting to think yourself out of a difficult situation. Not that I blame you. You obviously have plenty of resources to work with, The strategy has likely worked quite well with nearly every other problem in your life. You must be asking yourself, why not this one. The reason for this, (and again this is just my opinion) is that the nature of the problem is somewhat different than you believe it to be.
I have seen dilemmas similar to yours many times. Typically it takes at least another decade for an individual in your general circumstances to do what is necessary. Very often, even then they find the solution unpalatable, and things end up running their course. I'm not saying this to be harsh. I'm just giving you my perspective.
You are using substances for a reason. Sure there are physical and psychological reasons for this use, and you are addressing them in treatment, but there's also a dimension which I wonder if you have truly considered. For lack of a better term let me call it a spiritual dimension. I see hints of the problem in several of your responses on this thread.
I hope you can overcome some of your fear and consider what AA has to offer. Entertain the possibility that the nature of the problem is somewhat different than you may have assumed. Keep an open mind. Things may get far better than you might now imagine.
Here is a very brief article by one of the co founders of AA (a proctologist). I thought you might find it useful. On Cultivating Tolerance -by Dr. Bob
IMO you are attempting to think yourself out of a difficult situation. Not that I blame you. You obviously have plenty of resources to work with, The strategy has likely worked quite well with nearly every other problem in your life. You must be asking yourself, why not this one. The reason for this, (and again this is just my opinion) is that the nature of the problem is somewhat different than you believe it to be.
I have seen dilemmas similar to yours many times. Typically it takes at least another decade for an individual in your general circumstances to do what is necessary. Very often, even then they find the solution unpalatable, and things end up running their course. I'm not saying this to be harsh. I'm just giving you my perspective.
You are using substances for a reason. Sure there are physical and psychological reasons for this use, and you are addressing them in treatment, but there's also a dimension which I wonder if you have truly considered. For lack of a better term let me call it a spiritual dimension. I see hints of the problem in several of your responses on this thread.
I hope you can overcome some of your fear and consider what AA has to offer. Entertain the possibility that the nature of the problem is somewhat different than you may have assumed. Keep an open mind. Things may get far better than you might now imagine.
Here is a very brief article by one of the co founders of AA (a proctologist). I thought you might find it useful. On Cultivating Tolerance -by Dr. Bob
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by awuh1
You are using substances for a reason. Sure there are physical and psychological reasons for this use, and you are addressing them in treatment, but there's also a dimension which I wonder if you have truly considered. For lack of a better term let me call it a spiritual dimension. I see hints of the problem in several of your responses on this thread.
waking down
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 4,641
Originally Posted by bukowski
I'm not sure I know exactly what you mean when you speak of a spiritual dimension.
As an agnostic, I bristle at religion, atheism, and even AA. I can't say my spirituality involves faith.
As I've dug deeper into this recovery thing, I've found that my mental balance relies on some simple concepts and practices that can be called spiritual, but also in a very concrete sense they are practical, and there is scientific evidence demonstrating their efficacy (neuroscience, mostly, but I won't venture to explain this aspect of it).
Concepts and practices like compassion, loving-kindness, self-love, gratitude, stopping to smell the roses (taking in the good), breathing practice (meditation), actively creating meaning, awe that we are alive on this planet and hurling through space...
These are spiritual, I believe, and they may or may not include a concept of God or gods. Without actively practicing the above I do not believe I would be able to say I am in recovery. For me the difference between being sober for awhile and embracing recovery lies in the above concepts and practices.
I needed to rekindle some spirituality and magic in my life because I had slipped into fatalism and nihilism. I had begun abdicating responsibility for my life, bemoaning my fate, and drinking/drugging in large part to numb or escape the resulting existential vacuum. I have come to believe that substance abuse exacerbated my sense of existential vacuum, and I had to be sober for several months before the word spirituality even began to have any real meaning for me again.
These are my own insights. Perhaps relevant; maybe not.
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Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 20
Originally Posted by zerothehero
Right. There are as many definitions as there are people.
As an agnostic, I bristle at religion, atheism, and even AA. I can't say my spirituality involves faith.
As I've dug deeper into this recovery thing, I've found that my mental balance relies on some simple concepts and practices that can be called spiritual, but also in a very concrete sense they are practical, and there is scientific evidence demonstrating their efficacy (neuroscience, mostly, but I won't venture to explain this aspect of it).
Concepts and practices like compassion, loving-kindness, self-love, gratitude, stopping to smell the roses (taking in the good), breathing practice (meditation), actively creating meaning, awe that we are alive on this planet and hurling through space...
These are spiritual, I believe, and they may or may not include a concept of God or gods. Without actively practicing the above I do not believe I would be able to say I am in recovery. For me the difference between being sober for awhile and embracing recovery lies in the above concepts and practices.
I needed to rekindle some spirituality and magic in my life because I had slipped into fatalism and nihilism. I had begun abdicating responsibility for my life, bemoaning my fate, and drinking/drugging in large part to numb or escape the resulting existential vacuum. I have come to believe that substance abuse exacerbated my sense of existential vacuum, and I had to be sober for several months before the word spirituality even began to have any real meaning for me again.
These are my own insights. Perhaps relevant; maybe not.
As an agnostic, I bristle at religion, atheism, and even AA. I can't say my spirituality involves faith.
As I've dug deeper into this recovery thing, I've found that my mental balance relies on some simple concepts and practices that can be called spiritual, but also in a very concrete sense they are practical, and there is scientific evidence demonstrating their efficacy (neuroscience, mostly, but I won't venture to explain this aspect of it).
Concepts and practices like compassion, loving-kindness, self-love, gratitude, stopping to smell the roses (taking in the good), breathing practice (meditation), actively creating meaning, awe that we are alive on this planet and hurling through space...
These are spiritual, I believe, and they may or may not include a concept of God or gods. Without actively practicing the above I do not believe I would be able to say I am in recovery. For me the difference between being sober for awhile and embracing recovery lies in the above concepts and practices.
I needed to rekindle some spirituality and magic in my life because I had slipped into fatalism and nihilism. I had begun abdicating responsibility for my life, bemoaning my fate, and drinking/drugging in large part to numb or escape the resulting existential vacuum. I have come to believe that substance abuse exacerbated my sense of existential vacuum, and I had to be sober for several months before the word spirituality even began to have any real meaning for me again.
These are my own insights. Perhaps relevant; maybe not.
In terms of nihilism, it's a doctrine I haven't been able to shake since 1992. And weirdly enough, I feel crippled by it. I always used that feeling of exhaustive depression as confirmation that nihilism was true and accurate. The world was a horrible place and so the darkest philosophy must be true.
I don't know what I feel now. Very little, I suppose. I hate anyone who endeavours to unearth wisdom and truth. What a wanker, really and actually. What's the point?
My greatest obstacle (and it's honestly quite juvenile) is that happiness is naught but a neurochemical code. If we all pursue this code, what does it matter how we pursue this code?
It's juvenile, and yet I've quite extensively studied neuroscience. It's true. We jones for happiness like the hungriest heroin addicts. We really do.
So what is an addict supposed to think?
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