Laura567

So I am barely sober but realize that I cannot continue drinking. Last trip I was drunk every night. Felt sick and tired when I returned home. That is kind of the opposite to how normal people feel after their vacation..So I am trying to do things differently this time. The biggest problem is my boyfriend, he drinks, not like myself, but he likes beer and wine. I find it really stressful to be around him when I am sober. And I hate the beerbreath, his snoaring et.c. And I have repeteadly caved in because of him, thinking I will just have a glass or to to sleep better and not noticehe breath. And instead of just having one glass, I dive in to the barrel (yes, there is a 500l barrel of wine in the summerhouse, what an awesomw place for an alcoholic, Southern Europe) and get wasted. I really have no good plan or any strategies apart from telling my BF I want to stay sober and excersice, but that has been said before. He doesn´t quite realize the severity of my problem although I have been caught drinking in the closet et c. He still thinks i can moderate..sigh.

Just wanted to vent a bit, this is a great place, I relapse alll the time, but reading your stories and getting support makes me feel that one day even I will make it.

Dee74

Hi Laura

I wish you well but I have to be honest - I think you're going to have to accept that recovery means big changes to lifestyle.

I spent a lot of time trying to 'fix' my drinking problem, but not otherwise change my lifestyle.

Looking back what I really wanted was to find a way to drink without bad consequences.

I had to accept that wasn't possible before I got anywhere with my alcohol problem.

D

PurpleKnight

As Dee mentioned, Sobriety is not about simply not drinking, for me that never produced any longterm results!!

Instead I needed to make extreme changes to the activities I got involved in and the people I hung out with!!

When you say "I relapse all the time" . . . are you honestly content with this? or is it time to really give Sobriety to go? why settle for anything less?

Nothing changes if nothing changes Laura!!