Voice in my head - funny
 

So I was sitting with my therapist talking about my drinking. He said, "so do you want to cut back?"

I heard myself telling him, "No, I know that won't work. I want to quit entirely."

I say, WHAT? Who said that? No, I don't want to quit! OMG, I can't quit!

But it was too late. The real me had spoken. The dye was cast.

Sometimes in our own minds we know what we really have to do, even if we don't want to do it, I tried to moderate and cut back for a long time, but deep down I knew the answer was abstinence, but I didn't want to admit it, I eventually had to admit it to myself!!

I remember asking my counselor if he thought I was an alcoholic. I remember him saying....."Absolutely....." I sat and waited for him to continue but he was done speaking. I was waiting or wanting for him to say "absolutely not" even though I knew the truth....

If I had a dime for every time when in the throes of despair and pleading to the heaven's as to why my life sucked..if I had a dime for every time I heard that "quit drinking" whisper...well, I would have a helluva lot of dimes...like a few thousand dollars...that's a lot of dimes.

Go for it! You can do this.

Great post. Admitting the truth is the hardest part, but is also the first step in getting healthy.

Oh the Voice! It's crazy how it sounds just like YOUR voice. That other voice has the mentality of a 2 year old. ME! ME! ME! ME!. My has gotten much more quiet. Stay strong.

It's good that you told him, now when you see him you will always recall the confession.

"Cutting back" is damn near impossible for an alcoholic. Quitting altogether is the best thing to do. :)