social drinking
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Posts: 47
I have been trying that for the past two years, I know myself, I now I'm going to lose control as always. I don't want to enter in any kind negotiation with alcohol, let people who can control it drink, I want to completely erradicate it from my life.
I stopped worrying about what other people thought about my drinking and had to assess my own drinking, others would say and still say I didn't have a problem, but alcohol was causing problems in my own life so I needed to make a change to my relationship with alcohol regardless of their opinions.
For me I went round and round in circles on the experiment of moderation, each time things would progress as bad as before, I finally concluded the 1st drink was my problem, I drank to get drunk, and would still do so, a period of abstinence does not in some way cure or fix me, cutting out that first drink keeps the door of alcohol firmly shut, Sobriety for me was the only way forward to reclaim my life!!
For me I went round and round in circles on the experiment of moderation, each time things would progress as bad as before, I finally concluded the 1st drink was my problem, I drank to get drunk, and would still do so, a period of abstinence does not in some way cure or fix me, cutting out that first drink keeps the door of alcohol firmly shut, Sobriety for me was the only way forward to reclaim my life!!
Sounds like your friend doesn't really understand the progression that alcoholism takes and the dynamics related to alcohol addiction. IF I was able to drink once in awhile, I would be....but for me, that isn't an option.
Member
Join Date: May 2014
Posts: 596
I couldn't, but I suppose it may be possible for someone who drank heavy while younger to sort of grow out of it. I know guys from my fraternity who binge drank a lot in college who are married with kids now and drink only a couple times a month socially at this point. I went the other way. Guess it depends on the person, for some of us it becomes an obsession we can't let go that progresses as we age...
It doesn't matter what your friend thinks you can do, it matters what you think you can do. Or not do.
Before I understood alcoholism and alcohol abuse I used to think of other people "oh, they can have ONE, one won't kill you." It was only when I learned about alcoholism and admitted that I was an alcoholic that I realized that one will kill you. And I can never only have one. If I were to decide to pick up a drink right now, it certainly isn't going to be to have just one.
I would be hesitant to follow the advice of a perhaps well meaning friend on this issue. Only you know truly what happens when you drink. You wouldn't be here if alcohol were not causing trouble in your life. Would you really want to risk experimenting whether you can achieve moderation?
Before I understood alcoholism and alcohol abuse I used to think of other people "oh, they can have ONE, one won't kill you." It was only when I learned about alcoholism and admitted that I was an alcoholic that I realized that one will kill you. And I can never only have one. If I were to decide to pick up a drink right now, it certainly isn't going to be to have just one.
I would be hesitant to follow the advice of a perhaps well meaning friend on this issue. Only you know truly what happens when you drink. You wouldn't be here if alcohol were not causing trouble in your life. Would you really want to risk experimenting whether you can achieve moderation?
If your moderation is the same as mine
That would be no!!!!
One drink for me starts a craving andeads to many more. After that I am not able to predict the outcome of the way the evening will end for me.
I've tried too many times to drink like normal people the results far too often weren't a pleasent experience for me and often the people I was drinking with.
That would be no!!!!
One drink for me starts a craving andeads to many more. After that I am not able to predict the outcome of the way the evening will end for me.
I've tried too many times to drink like normal people the results far too often weren't a pleasent experience for me and often the people I was drinking with.
tonib, my DW said something similar to that when I chose to stop drinking. She said "Well you should be able to have a drink every now and then". I think she said this so I would not be disappointed if I failed in quitting drinking, and she wanted me to be a bit less depressed about it.
It's put very well in Nonsensical's signature:
"People who can control their drinking don't have a voice in their head telling them they can."
It's put very well in Nonsensical's signature:
"People who can control their drinking don't have a voice in their head telling them they can."
I have no off switch.
For me the first drink always did the damage, not all the ones after it
D
Hi tonib.
I tried every trick I could think of - used every bit of willpower I had - and I never, ever had just one drink. It was always drink until wasted or asleep. I once had 3 yrs. sober & decided to have a glass of wine. That glass led to 7 more years of out-of-control drinking. So NO, social drinking is not possible for me or any alcoholic.
I tried every trick I could think of - used every bit of willpower I had - and I never, ever had just one drink. It was always drink until wasted or asleep. I once had 3 yrs. sober & decided to have a glass of wine. That glass led to 7 more years of out-of-control drinking. So NO, social drinking is not possible for me or any alcoholic.
Member
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: the coast
Posts: 246
I mistook my drinking for "social drinking" just because I did most of my drinking in the bars with other heavy drinkers. That made it ok to me. When I really tried "social drinking" as in 1 or 2 to catch up with a friend I was unable to do so. I always got drunk. Best of luck.
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