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social drinking

Old 07-17-2014, 11:55 AM
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social drinking

A friend of mine said i can drink from time to time an its ok. I don't think i can have one drink. What do you guys think? Can a alcoholic eventually drink again in moderation?
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:03 PM
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I have been trying that for the past two years, I know myself, I now I'm going to lose control as always. I don't want to enter in any kind negotiation with alcohol, let people who can control it drink, I want to completely erradicate it from my life.
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:04 PM
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I stopped worrying about what other people thought about my drinking and had to assess my own drinking, others would say and still say I didn't have a problem, but alcohol was causing problems in my own life so I needed to make a change to my relationship with alcohol regardless of their opinions.

For me I went round and round in circles on the experiment of moderation, each time things would progress as bad as before, I finally concluded the 1st drink was my problem, I drank to get drunk, and would still do so, a period of abstinence does not in some way cure or fix me, cutting out that first drink keeps the door of alcohol firmly shut, Sobriety for me was the only way forward to reclaim my life!!
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:05 PM
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Only you can decide that. My personal experience: I tried for nearly 5 years and I can't do it. I always drink until I pass out.
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:06 PM
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Originally Posted by tonib View Post
A friend of mine said i can drink from time to time an its ok. I don't think i can have one drink. What do you guys think? Can a alcoholic eventually drink again in moderation?
what do YOU think is the more important question.
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:07 PM
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Sounds like your friend doesn't really understand the progression that alcoholism takes and the dynamics related to alcohol addiction. IF I was able to drink once in awhile, I would be....but for me, that isn't an option.
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:10 PM
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I tried to drink in moderation but always failed. Easier for me to not drink at all.
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Old 07-17-2014, 12:41 PM
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I couldn't, but I suppose it may be possible for someone who drank heavy while younger to sort of grow out of it. I know guys from my fraternity who binge drank a lot in college who are married with kids now and drink only a couple times a month socially at this point. I went the other way. Guess it depends on the person, for some of us it becomes an obsession we can't let go that progresses as we age...
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Old 07-17-2014, 02:53 PM
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It doesn't matter what your friend thinks you can do, it matters what you think you can do. Or not do.

Before I understood alcoholism and alcohol abuse I used to think of other people "oh, they can have ONE, one won't kill you." It was only when I learned about alcoholism and admitted that I was an alcoholic that I realized that one will kill you. And I can never only have one. If I were to decide to pick up a drink right now, it certainly isn't going to be to have just one.

I would be hesitant to follow the advice of a perhaps well meaning friend on this issue. Only you know truly what happens when you drink. You wouldn't be here if alcohol were not causing trouble in your life. Would you really want to risk experimenting whether you can achieve moderation?
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Old 07-17-2014, 02:58 PM
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If your moderation is the same as mine

That would be no!!!!

One drink for me starts a craving andeads to many more. After that I am not able to predict the outcome of the way the evening will end for me.
I've tried too many times to drink like normal people the results far too often weren't a pleasent experience for me and often the people I was drinking with.
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:08 PM
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tonib, my DW said something similar to that when I chose to stop drinking. She said "Well you should be able to have a drink every now and then". I think she said this so I would not be disappointed if I failed in quitting drinking, and she wanted me to be a bit less depressed about it.

It's put very well in Nonsensical's signature:

"People who can control their drinking don't have a voice in their head telling them they can."
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:35 PM
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Originally Posted by tonib View Post
A friend of mine said i can drink from time to time an its ok. I don't think i can have one drink. What do you guys think? Can a alcoholic eventually drink again in moderation?
I think you already know what the truth is for you ToniB

I have no off switch.
For me the first drink always did the damage, not all the ones after it

D
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:45 PM
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Anyone that can drink in moderation is not an alcoholic. So the answer is no. N.O.
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:48 PM
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Seems what you really want to know is can YOU drink in moderation. You'll have to answer that for yourself - just like the rest of us did.
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:49 PM
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Hi tonib.

I tried every trick I could think of - used every bit of willpower I had - and I never, ever had just one drink. It was always drink until wasted or asleep. I once had 3 yrs. sober & decided to have a glass of wine. That glass led to 7 more years of out-of-control drinking. So NO, social drinking is not possible for me or any alcoholic.
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Old 07-17-2014, 03:58 PM
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Suggest reading pg30-33 big bk coz once a pickle never a cucumber. Resist the urge to justify "that you are a normie" coz sounds to me already know result if pursue this
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Old 07-17-2014, 04:00 PM
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Well, have you ever tried moderation? I have and I know the answer for me. I certainly won't speak for everyone.
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Old 07-17-2014, 04:27 PM
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Not for me. Non alcoholics dont understand. I hear that all the time. If we could moderate we wouldnt be alcoholics.
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Old 07-17-2014, 04:56 PM
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I mistook my drinking for "social drinking" just because I did most of my drinking in the bars with other heavy drinkers. That made it ok to me. When I really tried "social drinking" as in 1 or 2 to catch up with a friend I was unable to do so. I always got drunk. Best of luck.
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Old 07-17-2014, 05:09 PM
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Originally Posted by tonib View Post
Can a alcoholic eventually drink again in moderation?
No
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