HealthyK

Being brand new to recovery, I am trying to get some ideas of things to do that don't revolve around being in bars. I used to play darts, sing, play those silly touch screen games because I spent all my time in bars. How do you find new, sober things to do when you're starting recovery? This has been one of my biggest struggles. Well, that and finally admitting I have a problem with alcohol.
Thanks in advance for any help!

Weaver

Well, what are some of your interests in general ?

DisplacedGRITS

I like to see what's going on in my city. This time of year is ripe with festivals, air fairs, foodie gatherings, outdoor concerts...tons of events! Check out some websites and see what's going on around you. I live in Seattle and I've found a lot of stuff on 12events (or events12. I forget). I also keep my ears open when I listen to the radio about what's going on.

Thepatman

There are many things to do sober. Just use your imagination. Maybe some old hobbies you did before your drinking career? Before mine I used to workout, so I'm back to the barbels and that feels pretty good. Specially for my self esteem.

I also found quiet alone time, just contemplating the outdoors relaxing. Gives me time to introspect and recharge my sobriety batteries.

Be kind to yourself

Spinach

To start of with I needed to be home , reading and DVDs, I also took up or started to look up all those things I used to enjoy before time got cut short! Keep looking and a path will be there, I loved the cinema but never went at night so that opened up again.
Also planning all the stuff you can spend your money on.
John.

HealthyK

I do enjoy music and such and working out so that's a good idea. Thank you. I have friends who drink socially and they're very supportive of me quitting because they know it's been a struggle.

Sometimes I wonder how to avoid looking like the odd one because I'm not drinking. I guess it always struck me as odd when someone didn't drink, including the friend who is going with me to my AA meeting. I'm not sure how to explain to people that I have an issue without feeling ashamed or looking weak.

Rence

Hobbies and interests are something you can concentrate on - preferably something relaxing or physical. Fishing, cooking, hiking, working out.

IOAA2

Hi and welcome. My experience, years ago was to join AA, long before the internet. For things to do I became very involved in the fellowship by setting up the halls, making hundreds of pots of coffee, cleaning up after the meeting, speaking even though it scared the $hi! out of me and in general joining in as I was very much a loner. The expression is “it works if we work it” is accurate as it saves our lives, our families, jobs etc.

As far as acceptance, we need to become honest with OUR SELVES about our own drinking then accept that we can not drink in safety. It’s that simple!

BE WELL

trachemys

Coffee houses, ice cream shops, internet cafes, all good alternatives.

Boudicca

I can definitely understand the concern that you may look odd or people may question you if you are not drinking. You don't have to explain anything if it makes you uncomfortable. In my experience most people don't care if you are drinking or not as long as you don't interfere with THEIR drinking, LOL!

If you do a search there are many excellent threads about how to answer uncomfortable questions, how to adjust to social situations, etc. I found them very helpful.

Keep up the good work!

MrBen

To get over the initial withdrawal, a massive, massive help was taking a few days off work and eating whatever I liked. The pound I gained was well worth kicking the poison I was drinking.

Ruby2

What Were there things you did for fun before you started going to bars? I drank for so long that I had quite forgotten that there was a huge chunk of my life where I managed to have fun that didn't involve alcohol at all. I started reconnecting with those things and trying new stuff.

I used to be a pretty good dart player only because I spent hours perfecting my game in a bar. Now I couldn't hit the broad side of a barn but it's okay. I paint, I have kids so I color with crayons sometimes, I take walks, garden. There are lots of little things you can try on for size. Good luck!

JD4010

This is somewhat the inverse of my question. I didn't drink at all out in public; didn't go to bars because they tend to be noisy and full of drunks (ha-ha). I drank at home, in the comfort of my own place, listening to my music and watching my DVDs.

I'm in the process of getting a divorce so it's easy to sit and drink.

I've decided that I've got to get out more. I already exercise a lot (walk to/from work, ride the bike everywhere). Lately, I've been hitting the library more frequently. Coffee houses are probably a great idea too.

Day 2 of sobriety, by the way.

PurpleKnight

Hanging out with people over coffee or going to see a movie are great things to start off with, and then build on your interests/hobbies that you'll develop in time!!

I think we can fear Sobriety as all we did with our time was drink, but there is a whole world out there to get involved in!!

BigTeddy

I enjoy going for a walk in the woods. It gives me quiet time to think as well as a bit of exercise. There's a great spot I've found that's about a 2 mile hike that overlooks a river. I stop there and meditate every time I make it out that way. I also enjoy playing darts, video games, etc. I bought a dart board and a playstation for my house. I enjoy going to dinner with friends. But I made it known to my close friends that I won't be drinking now or ever, so please don't offer it to me. Basically just find some hobbies that interest you, that don't involve booze. Go see music, exercise, go see a movie. I thought life would be dull without booze. But these last 11 months have been the most interesting, fun, and rewarding of my life.

zeldachan

Since working on sobriety started I've been doing all of the things that I've always wanted to do in town but couldn't cause I was bombed. Laser tag, paintball, running races, board games, the gym... Pick up your local alt weekly calendar and go to town. Literally!

MrBen

Speaking of gym stuff, going to classes is a really fun way to meet people.

LBrain

HI HealthyK,
Try The Grand. Not sure what you're into but it's prolly a taxi ride or bus for you. It's always a great place to see any music. David Bromberg is a "local" and is a big influence on guitar players in the area. He's touring right now but he is in Ocean City NJ tonight.

I saw a link for Taj Mahal too. I'm pist because he just play at the Keswick in June. It's taken me six months to start wanting to do things again.

I just starting a "spinning" class at gold's gym. Going tonight. And there are numerous classes to join up , ZUMBA, Body Pump even some yoga classes etc.

There are always live in the parks free summer concerts. You have given me ideas. Thanks.

With just a little motivation you can fill up your days with non-drinking activities. Maybe get out to see the Blue Rocks play. Minor league baseball is a good time. Or even go to the Phillies - they're practically giving away tickets. Get Gen Adm Tix and roam the outfield with some friends.
Lot's to do if we just look.

13-14 Season / The Grand Wilmington

SonomaGal

Go out for desert, see a movie, go to a show, go for a walk, go dancing, pick up a sport, make gourmet food, go for a drive, go ice skating, go swimming, go hiking, go to coffee ... There's definitely more to do than go to bars but it takes a while to get used to it.