sober day 1
Member
Thread Starter
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: in the city by the bay
Posts: 605
sober day 1
because it just needs to end...reached my lowest point last Wednesday, no drinking Thursday...thought I could handle "a little wine" on Friday, yesterday. Woke up realizing I hadn't made my kids dinner. My husband was around, they didn't starve but can't live like this anymore.
My husband, who rarely drinks or has one glass and can stop...I can't...well he just bought a case of wine at Costco...as of this morning we had 13 bottles of wine in the house, I told him, I don't care what you do with it, just get rid of it. He said he's wanted me to quit for a long time but he needed me to come to the decision. I thought he'd be annoyed as he just bought a lot of wine but he wasn't. It made me realize how much he's wanted this to stop.
I thought I was a manageable drunk, well it's not manageable anymore.
My kids were little once, one still is but the other 2 are going to figure out soon (if they haven't already) that mom is a drunk loser.
7-12-14 sounded like a good quit date. I talked about it with my husband, which I never had done before. I cried. I spoke to each of my older children about it. See, I've been pretty good at hiding it for the most part. Last Wednesday, we were on vacation and I started drinking in the morning, which led to a completely trashed mom by the evening. I don't even really remember the day clearly.
Been juicing all day, beets, kale, lemons, carrots...
opened a new email account with today's date in it...so I will always see it.
got a hypnosis app...an AA app...and motivating thoughts app. I also know where the nearest AA meetings are held. I was always too ashamed to go to an AA meeting but being an ugly drunk in front of my kids was the last straw. Pretty sure they will never forget. They still seem to like me but if I continue, eventually they won't.
It's gonna be hard, I know it. That is why I am here.
I wish everyone luck in overcoming this monster!
My husband, who rarely drinks or has one glass and can stop...I can't...well he just bought a case of wine at Costco...as of this morning we had 13 bottles of wine in the house, I told him, I don't care what you do with it, just get rid of it. He said he's wanted me to quit for a long time but he needed me to come to the decision. I thought he'd be annoyed as he just bought a lot of wine but he wasn't. It made me realize how much he's wanted this to stop.
I thought I was a manageable drunk, well it's not manageable anymore.
My kids were little once, one still is but the other 2 are going to figure out soon (if they haven't already) that mom is a drunk loser.
7-12-14 sounded like a good quit date. I talked about it with my husband, which I never had done before. I cried. I spoke to each of my older children about it. See, I've been pretty good at hiding it for the most part. Last Wednesday, we were on vacation and I started drinking in the morning, which led to a completely trashed mom by the evening. I don't even really remember the day clearly.
Been juicing all day, beets, kale, lemons, carrots...
opened a new email account with today's date in it...so I will always see it.
got a hypnosis app...an AA app...and motivating thoughts app. I also know where the nearest AA meetings are held. I was always too ashamed to go to an AA meeting but being an ugly drunk in front of my kids was the last straw. Pretty sure they will never forget. They still seem to like me but if I continue, eventually they won't.
It's gonna be hard, I know it. That is why I am here.
I wish everyone luck in overcoming this monster!
Sobriety is Traditional
Join Date: Dec 2012
Location: Orcas Island, Washington
Posts: 9,067
Welcome to the world's most popular forum that nobody likes to join!
I, and several other members, have found AA and SoberRecovery to be an excellent combination. Apparently, there is a SoberRecovery app you might want to investigate.
You can do this!
I, and several other members, have found AA and SoberRecovery to be an excellent combination. Apparently, there is a SoberRecovery app you might want to investigate.
You can do this!
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
Hi there Soberjuly -
You are not alone. If I had a dollar for every mom I know that is drinking or has drank their way through their children's childhood...
I know at times it feels like its a coping mechanism with all the stresses motherhood carries with it. Truth is it just destroys whatever great moments there are to be had . But you will find there are many and more wonderful moments in sobriety. Just watch.
Welcome ! You are amongst friends and those that truly get it.
You are not alone. If I had a dollar for every mom I know that is drinking or has drank their way through their children's childhood...
I know at times it feels like its a coping mechanism with all the stresses motherhood carries with it. Truth is it just destroys whatever great moments there are to be had . But you will find there are many and more wonderful moments in sobriety. Just watch.
Welcome ! You are amongst friends and those that truly get it.
Member
Join Date: Dec 2013
Location: Brooklyn, ny
Posts: 734
Hi soberjuly - I like that you are planning on doing all the right things. I recommend you google the site " tired of thinking about drinking ". Along with SR, that site has been very helpful in my recovery. Wishing you the best.
aka In 'n Out
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Southern California
Posts: 103
you're doing the right things. I also hid my problem from people. I'm on day 7 - for the third time - and I'm really feeling hopeful. AA and this board have been a huge support. good luck and keep coming back!
Member
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,001
You can do it. Your story is just like mine. I hid it so well. But i explained to my wife what i needed to do. She is beginning to understand that for us abstinence is the only true solution. The juicing really helps, all that stuff helps purge the body of the poison. Good job!
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