sparklingwater

I've been sober for 5 weeks now and feeling very solid. Since being sober, I have faced the following challenges: dinner at my dear friend's house with wine flowing, eaten out twice at my favorite restaurant where I would always get a glass or two of wine, and going away for the 4th of July where drinking is part of the culture of the city.

Tonight my husband and I are going to a going-away party for one of our friends and the crowd is definitely a drinking crowd. I'm very confident I will remain sober and am nervous our friends will be wondering why I'm not drinking. Like most of you I'm sure, I was the life of the party. To compound matters, I've been largely out of touch with most of them due to focusing on my sobriety so it's likely to be a bit awkward anyway.

I know I've read that most people don't even notice or care when you quit drinking. Did you find this to be true? I'm still considering what I will say if I'm asked why I'm not drinking.

I will be sure to update tonight after the party. My husband and I are planning on only going for 2 hours (it is scheduled for 4) and if I feel the least bit uncomfortable, we are leaving immediately. Thanks in advance!

Raider

Congrats on five weeks!!! Good luck tonight.

PurpleKnight

I noticed that a lot of other people don't drink also, when I was drinking I was concentrating on how quickly I was drinking, when I was getting my next drink, what was in my glass etc to even realise what was in everyone else's glasses, when I got Sober my eyes were opened to how many people are designated drivers or just don't drink at every social occasion.

We get soo worked up over these things, but that is because we never imagined going to them before without drinking, but to others simply choosing not to drink is normal to them, so being a part of the non drinking group for the night shouldn't be as stressful as it sometimes can be.

You can do this!!

sparklingwater

Thanks PurpleKnight! I've made similar observations at restaurants now that I'm sober about how many nondrinkers there really are! Or, how some people will nurse a glass of wine or a beer for their whole meal. Crazy!

trachemys

Keep a glass of club soda or tonic with lime wedges and no one will ever know or ask.

Anna

Just say 'No, thanks' and move on to another topic of conversation.

I have to say, I couldn't have done what you have been doing. It took me many months to feel comfortable with alcohol around me. Stay strong!

sparklingwater

We just got home! I had my husband get me a club soda with lime from the bar (didn't feel quite comfortable going up there) and mostly, no one even noticed. One of my better friends asked me what I was drinking and I acted like I didn't hear her and changed the subject. Her husband later asked me if I was drinking gin and tonic and I very dork-like replied, "ya- you know me!" Usually I am a wine drinker like her so I'm not sure what he made of the comment

At some point I do want to tell my friend about my sobriety, but tonight definitely wasn't the night. Overall, I had a good time and I'm glad we went. Thanks so much for listening!

trachemys

Good job!

PurpleKnight

Great job!!