Lola23

I questioned whether I wanted to post here at all but I think its best that I do. I drank over the weekend, I had almost 25 days and was feeling great so I'm not sure what happened.

I won't linger on it b/c I don't think the how or why makes much of a difference at this point, I just want to move forward.

I hated how I felt the next day and I hate how I feel at work today.

trachemys

Sobriety takes practice, Lola. It's good you're back with us.

melki

I would think the how or why make all the difference in the world. You have to face what got you to the place you don't want to be today. Think what triggered you and prepare a plan for next time. You can do it!!!

theupsides92

Make notes on what caused the thought or the impulse. Being aware of what I think is going to cause my impulses helps me a great deal. Remember that we've ALL been there before, I know the hopeless feelings quite well. You're not alone out there! Hope you have a better day today.

soberclover

I like how you are staying focused on the present day and moving forward

HeadLump

Get back up and try again, Lola. You can do this!

PurpleKnight

Hey Lola, nothing for it only getting back on board, tweak the plan a bit and you'll get there!!

Serenidad

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and try again. Maybe journal about why you think you decided it was ok to drink again. Trust me...I've done it billion times & journaling helps! You can do it!!!!

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LoftyIdeals

Glad you posted, Lola. Its the right response to your slip. Jump back on the bus, learn from it and forgive yourself.

ScottFromWI

Glad you came back lola. While you can't change the past, it is important to learn from it. Something in your plan must have been lacking, or perhaps you weren't following it? Either way - fix it and move forward.

Cecil

Glad you're back Lola!

Lola23

Thanks everyone.

To make a long story short, I went to a July 4th cookout/party. I knew it was probably a bad idea b/c it was definitely more of a party than just a cookout. As in...there wasn't something else to focus on except for drinking. I didn't have an escape plan since a friend pretty much invited himself to go with me and asked if he could crash at my place that night. I didn't want to say no. I should have.

Here's one thing that really got to me. Most of my friends were like..."oh, you didn't drink for almost a month, that's pretty good. You don't need to quit forever, its not like you're an alcoholic or anything." They don't know.

I hate that today is day 1 again. HATE it.

lunar

I'm not sure what to say here.
I will say I've tried over 100 times++ to stop drinking for good and failed.
However the time spent stopped strongly outweighed the time drinking.

Soberpotamus

Sounds like you've learned a few things, so don't hate it You can now use those things to help you move forward. Great job for posting about it and starting anew!

ScottFromWI

I wasn't able to get any serious sober time at all until I unconditionally accepted that I cannot pick up the first drink, ever. As long as you have even a shred of doubt in your mind that you can just have one, or can somehow quit for a while and then go back to normal drinking, you most likely will.

least

Forgive yourself, learn from it, and move forward again.

Thepatman

You had some great input here. Dust off and make today a sober day

ultradad

At least you made it back okay, Lola! So many people relapse and never make it back! This disease is trying to kill us and we have to fight with everything in us and even then sometimes it's not enough! My experience was I needed help, could never do it on my own! I wen't to AA and it has saved my life. Find what works for you and and you'll never have to feel this way again! Pulling for you!

Dee74

Welcome back Lola

D