Diamonds and the Elephant in the Room
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Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 1,909
Nuudawn, thank you for your post! I can relate to so much here as well and too NEED reminding that it IS that bad.
The reaction of the saleswoman was ignorant, but that just goes to remind you the stigma of alcoholism in our society. People who haven't dealt with it or at least educated themselves about it will not understand. I would've HATED being pitied. You had a very healthy reaction to it, good for you!
I am also so happy to have found the place where we can find understanding and support and relate to many stories and experiences. My husband jokes "visiting your friends again"? And yes, I am! It feels wonderful to be here.
I see the ring trend has been started.
I just got one the other day. I fully realize that everything that's needed for my sobriety is already in me, and the ring won't hold any magical powers, but it makes me happier. It's a little treat for myself, and it is very symbolic and full of meaning for me. I got an eternity band. Get it get it, eternity? 
It's a little jagged so that it reminds me it's there and reminds me of the problem and of my commitment. It's very sparkly, and of course I love me some bling 
but mostly it reminds of all the sparkle that sober life has to offer. Ok, and don't think I'm totally off the rocker, but I say HI to it every morning Hey, better than all the AV conversations, right???
The reaction of the saleswoman was ignorant, but that just goes to remind you the stigma of alcoholism in our society. People who haven't dealt with it or at least educated themselves about it will not understand. I would've HATED being pitied. You had a very healthy reaction to it, good for you!
I am also so happy to have found the place where we can find understanding and support and relate to many stories and experiences. My husband jokes "visiting your friends again"? And yes, I am! It feels wonderful to be here.
I see the ring trend has been started.
I just got one the other day. I fully realize that everything that's needed for my sobriety is already in me, and the ring won't hold any magical powers, but it makes me happier. It's a little treat for myself, and it is very symbolic and full of meaning for me. I got an eternity band. Get it get it, eternity? It's a little jagged so that it reminds me it's there and reminds me of the problem and of my commitment. It's very sparkly, and of course I love me some bling but mostly it reminds of all the sparkle that sober life has to offer. Ok, and don't think I'm totally off the rocker, but I say HI to it every morning Hey, better than all the AV conversations, right???
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Thanks guys. And Soberjennie...that book sounds like a MUST read for me. What you say about it reminds me a little of the Spirituality of Imperfection (which I think has been my fave recovery book to date just for the warm cocoa feel..the self acceptance I found reading it). And for all you who understand the little celebratory factor in getting yourself some sobriety bling...thank you. Maybe I just want a little sumthing sumthing to celebrate little ole moi....as for me, sobriety is very much about discovering who me actually is and being accepting of same...flaws and all.
As far as the salesperson, I didn't really find her rude (holy hannah but the one who called someone's ring cheap sure was..wow!!!). I think I was actually a little more shocked than grievous about it. For whatever reason, I just didn't expect her "weirdness" at the statement. I don't THINK I said it with any shame or anything. Whatever it was, affected her way more than I had anticipated...her own shadows somewhere I suspect.
"the sparkle that sobriety has to offer"...love that Melki.
As far as the salesperson, I didn't really find her rude (holy hannah but the one who called someone's ring cheap sure was..wow!!!). I think I was actually a little more shocked than grievous about it. For whatever reason, I just didn't expect her "weirdness" at the statement. I don't THINK I said it with any shame or anything. Whatever it was, affected her way more than I had anticipated...her own shadows somewhere I suspect.
"the sparkle that sobriety has to offer"...love that Melki.
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Join Date: Aug 2013
Posts: 2,129
Nuudawn,
You are one of my favorite posters on SR, ever since I joined last year. You make a lot of sense, you've got sparkle and sass, you make people think, react and respond. I know how much you love you some alphaomega, as do I, and when I see either of you start a new thread I feel the way I believe the old faithful family yellow Lab feels in anticipation of a car ride: 'oh yes yes yes, we go in the fast spinny machine oh what will we see oh what will we smell are we going to that warm place with the water where we run so much are we going to that place in the fast machine where I got a lot of ice cream that time will we get to run so much again like those other times and smell all the things oh crap are we going where they cut my nuts off that time?'
I'm really happy your recent posts haven't cut my nuts off, lady. You inspire me with how diligently you've been showing up for life and your sobriety.
I admire you,
Melina
You are one of my favorite posters on SR, ever since I joined last year. You make a lot of sense, you've got sparkle and sass, you make people think, react and respond. I know how much you love you some alphaomega, as do I, and when I see either of you start a new thread I feel the way I believe the old faithful family yellow Lab feels in anticipation of a car ride: 'oh yes yes yes, we go in the fast spinny machine oh what will we see oh what will we smell are we going to that warm place with the water where we run so much are we going to that place in the fast machine where I got a lot of ice cream that time will we get to run so much again like those other times and smell all the things oh crap are we going where they cut my nuts off that time?'
I'm really happy your recent posts haven't cut my nuts off, lady. You inspire me with how diligently you've been showing up for life and your sobriety.
I admire you,
Melina
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Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,580
Originally Posted by Melina 
Nuudawn,
You are one of my favorite posters on SR, ever since I joined last year. You make a lot of sense, you've got sparkle and sass, you make people think, react and respond. I know how much you love you some alphaomega, as do I, and when I see either of you start a new thread I feel the way I believe the old faithful family yellow Lab feels in anticipation of a car ride: 'oh yes yes yes, we go in the fast spinny machine oh what will we see oh what will we smell are we going to that warm place with the water where we run so much are we going to that place in the fast machine where I got a lot of ice cream that time will we get to run so much again like those other times and smell all the things oh crap are we going where they cut my nuts off that time?'
I'm really happy your recent posts haven't cut my nuts off, lady. You inspire me with how diligently you've been showing up for life and your sobriety.
I admire you,
Melina
You are one of my favorite posters on SR, ever since I joined last year. You make a lot of sense, you've got sparkle and sass, you make people think, react and respond. I know how much you love you some alphaomega, as do I, and when I see either of you start a new thread I feel the way I believe the old faithful family yellow Lab feels in anticipation of a car ride: 'oh yes yes yes, we go in the fast spinny machine oh what will we see oh what will we smell are we going to that warm place with the water where we run so much are we going to that place in the fast machine where I got a lot of ice cream that time will we get to run so much again like those other times and smell all the things oh crap are we going where they cut my nuts off that time?'
I'm really happy your recent posts haven't cut my nuts off, lady. You inspire me with how diligently you've been showing up for life and your sobriety.
I admire you,
Melina
Thank you, with all my heart. Thank you.
(P.S. our friend Alpha will be back spinning her sonnets soon. I'm positive of it)
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Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Earth
Posts: 164
I like the ring idea! I like the tattoo idea even more! I have a lot of tattoo ideas in mind, so maybe at the end of the summer, at a certain milestone, I'll get one. YEAH!
I'm sorry that saleslady experience happened to you. For some reason, although I've known that I have a drinking problem for a long time, and have taken many long breaks from drinking, I never like to tell people that I have a drinking problem. I've openly admitted it to my partner, and today to my good friend (unfortunately I had to), but for the most part I just say that I'm taking a break, or don't like it anymore, etc.--anything but admit that I actually need to be committed to sobriety because I'm addicted to alcohol (and actually NuuDawn my drinking habit was very similar to yours.)
Why do I usually give other reasons? Why did you not want to admit it initially? It's a beautiful, healthy, amazing thing, but sober people always get weird looks. America is full of alcoholics. But at the same time, addiction is so stigmatized. It's everywhere-- addiction, and addiction to addiction.
Just a thought here. Is it possible that alcoholism and addiction are stigmatized so widely, and so intensely, because they are actually so prevalent, albeit in lesser degrees, throughout the population?
YEAH!I'm sorry that saleslady experience happened to you. For some reason, although I've known that I have a drinking problem for a long time, and have taken many long breaks from drinking, I never like to tell people that I have a drinking problem. I've openly admitted it to my partner, and today to my good friend (unfortunately I had to), but for the most part I just say that I'm taking a break, or don't like it anymore, etc.--anything but admit that I actually need to be committed to sobriety because I'm addicted to alcohol (and actually NuuDawn my drinking habit was very similar to yours.)
Why do I usually give other reasons? Why did you not want to admit it initially? It's a beautiful, healthy, amazing thing, but sober people always get weird looks. America is full of alcoholics. But at the same time, addiction is so stigmatized. It's everywhere-- addiction, and addiction to addiction.
Just a thought here. Is it possible that alcoholism and addiction are stigmatized so widely, and so intensely, because they are actually so prevalent, albeit in lesser degrees, throughout the population?
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Join Date: Dec 2006
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Originally Posted by Clementina
Is it possible that alcoholism and addiction are stigmatized so widely, and so intensely, because they are actually so prevalent, albeit in lesser degrees, throughout the population?
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Join Date: May 2014
Location: Washington, MO
Posts: 2,306
I am not an animal either lest I take that first drink. Also agree that SR visits help remind me that the wild kingdom is one drink away and the abstinent world is a much bigger place indeed--cages suck!
Its a cold and its a broken hallelujah.
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 2,887
So THIS is why my ears have been ringing and my palms a itchin'.
Dang, gurlz, you make a grande old dame blush with all the lovin' around here.
Mutual Adoration Society for sure Mel and Nuu.
XO AO
Dang, gurlz, you make a grande old dame blush with all the lovin' around here.
Mutual Adoration Society for sure Mel and Nuu.
XO AO
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