Yet ANOTHER failure... good lord.
Member
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Los Angeles, California
Posts: 8,326
Myrrryah,
you might take a look at AVRT. It's helped me so much. Rational Recovery is what helped me get a better grip.
This might help http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html
love from Lenina
you might take a look at AVRT. It's helped me so much. Rational Recovery is what helped me get a better grip.
This might help http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ined-long.html
love from Lenina
Administrator
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Australia
Posts: 211,385
Some really great advice here Myrrrah 
In the end I accepted I could be the person I wanted to be...or I could drink - but not both....
If you can embrace that truth, I think you'll have a solid foundation for recovery
D
In the end I accepted I could be the person I wanted to be...or I could drink - but not both....
If you can embrace that truth, I think you'll have a solid foundation for recovery
D
Member
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: NC
Posts: 1,737
Originally Posted by Mrrryah1 
I’ve had so many 30 day and 24 hour chips and I’ve never made it past a couple of months sober. It's like being in a relationship with someone who keeps hurting you over and over again, eventually you just need to give up on it. That's how I feel about trying to get sober. Does that even make sense?!?
Personally, I had to contemplate suicide as the alternative to not drinking to make the leap. It's not necessary to go that far down the drain, it's only necessary to honestly accept that drinking is a battle we lost a long time ago and commit every single day to the alternative. I have four years, and it's something I need to consciously do almost on a daily basis. That doesn't make me a failure - it makes me a realist.
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Boy do I relate to your post! If I didn't know better I would have thought that "I" wrote it! After bouncing in and out of the rooms of AA for several years and getting a million 30 day coins it wasn't until until 2008 when I ended up
in jail for a DUI that I got sober. I was sober for almost 6 years.
Unfortunately I decided to "test the waters" again last fall and am getting back on my feet now. I did it once....I can do it again! This time I am doing Rational Recovery, SR and exercise. AA works for many people but it's not for me. I used it for the first year or so (court ordered) of my 6 years but then stopped. BUT...it does work for some people.
You CAN do this!!! If I can do it...you can! Don't give up! Message me anytime you need extra support!!!
image-3446360751.jpg
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
in jail for a DUI that I got sober. I was sober for almost 6 years.
Unfortunately I decided to "test the waters" again last fall and am getting back on my feet now. I did it once....I can do it again! This time I am doing Rational Recovery, SR and exercise. AA works for many people but it's not for me. I used it for the first year or so (court ordered) of my 6 years but then stopped. BUT...it does work for some people.
You CAN do this!!! If I can do it...you can! Don't give up! Message me anytime you need extra support!!!
image-3446360751.jpg
Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery
Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: New England
Posts: 1,926
Originally Posted by sobercalmwishes
I believe there is a psychological aspect to how that program is worked that makes you feel like an utter failure if you drink 3 days out of (what did you say? 5 weeks? 7 x 5 = 35) days? Celebrate your 35 days, and jump back in!! You did great!!
image-2436671183.jpg
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Crazy Cat Lady
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Seattle, WA
Posts: 2,661
All i know is that AA has worked for me where rehab and willpower failed. Part of it is definitely that AA strongly encourages a person to build a sober support group. When all else fails to pull me out of spiraling depression and self centeredness, work with another alcoholic does the job. I can't just read the big book and go to meetings. I have to be active in my program in all aspects of my life. I guess it's that psychic change i keep hearing about.
All i know is that this time, my whole concept of sobriety is different. I feel unsettled if i start to lapse back into my old ways, even a little bit. Today, i was curt with my husband over the phone and i was really angry with him. Part of me really, really wanted to continue to argument when he got home. I had a scheduled meeting with my sponsor and we went to the women's group i always attend and someone said that if they weren't being grateful they were being hateful. Damnit. My anger dropped away from me and i saw my part in the argument. The first thing i did when i got home was apologize to my husband. I've done that before but this time, i didn't apologize and remind him that he was wrong too. He knows his part in it. This time, i just said that i was sorry for my foul attitude. I didn't try to pry an apology from him as well. It felt so good to let my anger go. I don't know how i would have reacted to him had i not been taught by AA to see the role i play in what distresses me in my life. I feel like i have some measure of control over my emotions, something i've never felt before.
AA isn't perfect but nothing is. For me, it's a large piece of my sobriety. I think it's because the program has encouraged this monumental shift in my attitude and thoughts that AA is working for me. A woman even said it today, take what you need and leave the rest. If certain aspects of the program don't work for you, leave them. Just be sure to be honest with yourself as to your motives for leaving them. Be sure it's because they don't work and not because you don't think they can work or don't want them to work. Honesty with yourself is one of the absolute musts of sobriety.
All i know is that this time, my whole concept of sobriety is different. I feel unsettled if i start to lapse back into my old ways, even a little bit. Today, i was curt with my husband over the phone and i was really angry with him. Part of me really, really wanted to continue to argument when he got home. I had a scheduled meeting with my sponsor and we went to the women's group i always attend and someone said that if they weren't being grateful they were being hateful. Damnit. My anger dropped away from me and i saw my part in the argument. The first thing i did when i got home was apologize to my husband. I've done that before but this time, i didn't apologize and remind him that he was wrong too. He knows his part in it. This time, i just said that i was sorry for my foul attitude. I didn't try to pry an apology from him as well. It felt so good to let my anger go. I don't know how i would have reacted to him had i not been taught by AA to see the role i play in what distresses me in my life. I feel like i have some measure of control over my emotions, something i've never felt before.
AA isn't perfect but nothing is. For me, it's a large piece of my sobriety. I think it's because the program has encouraged this monumental shift in my attitude and thoughts that AA is working for me. A woman even said it today, take what you need and leave the rest. If certain aspects of the program don't work for you, leave them. Just be sure to be honest with yourself as to your motives for leaving them. Be sure it's because they don't work and not because you don't think they can work or don't want them to work. Honesty with yourself is one of the absolute musts of sobriety.
Member
Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 74
Originally Posted by Mrrryah1
Thanks anew. At least I'm not the only one.
One mistake doesn't mess you up forever...just keep trying. That's all any of us can do! Hang in there!
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