FaithfulAndFree

These are the worst forms of punishments for alcoholics. Guilt about the harm and hurt you caused and anxious about if the terror is over. These two are consuming me at the current moment. I'm annoying people with all my "should I be worried" and "what if's". The overall answer I get is "it's over, move on". But I'm struggling with leaving all my thoughts behind.

PurpleKnight

We've all been there, but they're right, we can't change the past, only the future, we gotta find a way of making peace with ourselves in the hope that we're turning things around by being Sober.

You've many people here that understand what you're feeling!!

Boudicca

This was posted on the Secular Connections forum and I found it to be hugely inspirational. Hope it inspires you:

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v...546055&fref=nf

FaithfulAndFree

Very Inspiring!! Actually makes me want to join the forces.

desypete

my head wouldnt ever let me have a day off
i had to worry myself sick about everything, and if i had nothing to worry about i would soon find something to worry over

i was so used to feel crap about myself and low as my past was always one of shame that i had done to others
with every drunken spree i caused harm somewhere, and when i would wake up with the guilt shame and remorse and swear i would never do it again or never drink again i would mean it
but each time it added yet another burdon on my shoulders to worry about and feel low about

the only escape from this i found at aa but its taken many years of growing and changing and trying different things in my life that brought about this new freedom i have today

my head doesn't spin like a washing machine anymore, i can accept things in my life even if there bad and not try to change the outcome, or spend wasted time thinking about it and how if only it would be this way or that

i had to first see the problem that was making me feel down
then ask myself can i do anything about this problem ? if i can then i have to do it to make it right
if i can not do anything about it like things happend in my past i have to accept there is nothing i can do about it and let if go

try writing something bad you have done down in the past on a bit of paper and then set light to it and watch is go up in smoke. that is all you can do about things that happened in your past

of course if you can do somthing like say sorry to someone for past mistakes then that is an action you can take to correct the outcome of the past but for me i need to work with a sponsor to find these things out

but just to learn the art of letting things go is just amazing for someone like me who would worry over anything

SoberHoopsFan

Guilt is something I struggled with and still do, but what has helped me is letting go of things from the past that I cannot change. What happened happened. We've all let people down, maybe even significantly hurt others through our drinking, it's what alcohol does to us. The only thing you can change is going forward. Carrying the guilt everywhere and dwelling on it usually led me back to drinking every time. I know this is easier said than done and I struggle with it too, but you have to focus on what you can control going forward.

lovesymphony

I totally understand, EJM. Right now I keep wondering what kind of damage I've done to my mind and body. I think awful stuff like would I be smarter, prettier, have a better memory, live longer, etc. had I not drenched my insides with so much poison, and I know the fact is I'll never get the chance to go back in time. But it's hard to face.

It could have been worse for us, though. Much worse. I had two accidents but no DUIs or injured anyone. And now we're recovering .I'm sure if you think about it, you can see that in many ways you've been lucky, too.