Scared!!!
 

Today is day 5 without a drink. Today is also the day I usually relapse. I'm so scared I won't make it through the day. I feel like I'm waiting for the "boogie man" to jump out and get me. It's terrifying! Logically, I find it insane that I am scared that alcohol is gonna "get" me but it ALWAYS catches me off guard on this day. Once I get that craving or obsession it's like I'm being pulled under the ocean by a strong current and can't get out.

Does this sound familiar? Does anyone have advice? My normal drinking pattern is every several days starting about 4:45 with a 6 pack and then off to a bar to drink to oblivion or until something really bad happens. I hate alcohol! It wants to kill me!

I HAVE to make it through today!!!

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Perhaps if you plan out your day hour by hour so that way you will stay busy. In my early sobriety I stayed away from places where alcohol was available and I also stayed away from people who I would drink with. It will be exciting when you break your former record by staying sober!

Thanks soberclover! That's a really good idea!

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Come up with a plan, execute it to the letter and there will be nothing left to chance, you can do this!! :)

Don't buy booze, stay out of liquor stores, bars and restaurants.

You know, the booze doesn't creep up on you and jump out of a bush. Nobody trips on the steps and ends up accidentally guzzling a six-pack on the way down. Take the volition out of it. Plan to be someplace doing something that doesn't involve you drinking.

Soon you'll be on day six.

There is such a thing as a self-fulfilling prophesy. You need to combat the negative thoughts of "This has always happened before, so it's going to happen again."

It only happens if you surrender to the fear and the obsession to drink. Like others have said, have a plan to stay occupied. Also, beware of the "triggers" you mentioned in a previous post. Come the end of the day, don't let anger and anxiety be the "Reason" you need to drink. Day five is just like day four. You can do this.

Do you have any theatres that show movies round that time? I'm with the rest. Structure your day so you are unable to be alone and able to fall into some old habitual pattern..like the one detailed.

I tried to stay incredibly busy! I scrubbed floors, cleaned closets, ironed shirts, cleaned the fridge.......anything to keep my hands and mind occupied. I am ashamed to admit how much mindless TV I watched the first 2 weeks, LOL!

Somehow menial labor seemed to help. My hands were busy, but I didn't do anything that required any mental clarity or sharpness. I mean I cleaned things that didn't need to be cleaned. Do you have chores or things that you have been putting off?

At the end of the day, I took care of a bunch of things that I had been meaning to do for ages and I DIDN'T DRINK.

Hope this helps. Keep it up, you can do it!

Nuudawn will be able to relate to this.

It's like the 250 pound woman who is trying to lose weight and "can't" get below 200. Every time she gets to 201, she gives up and goes back to her old ways because she's never been able to do it before. I've seen people do this for YEARS! She's convinced she can't.

Whether you think you can or you think you can't - you're right.

If you're tired of failing, stop giving up.

Today is my first day I have made it to day 5 a few times before. I'm not letting this thing beat me this time I am not giving in. I appreciate your post makes me feel like I'm not alone.

Good luck Z00p! Stay in touch! Let's do this!!!

Thx for everyone's advice! Busy busy!!! I'm gonna stay busy!

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