ElleDee

Well I made it a week. The black eye is less black. More purpley and yellow. I've been to 8 meetings in 7 days so far (shooting for 90 in 90) and I'm working on getting a sponsor. I'm also just widening my support network so I have people to call.

It's been tough since early last evening. The urge to drink was ridiculous last night. I was even getting so crabby. Today is okay, I'm at work.

I kinda feel that if it weren't for health reasons that I know I need to quit, I probably wouldn't. It seems so crazy!

But I'm still sober and hanging in there.

ANewDay2014

Hi ElleDee, it took a health scare for me to face up to my problem. Like you, I'd still probably be in the same state had I not! I feel awful that all the issues I had, all the pain I caused and people I hurt (including myself through my obnoxiousness whilst intoxicated), it was never enough to make me want to quit. Totally selfish, it took a health issue for me to wake up to my problem.

Hang on in there, a week is something to be proud of! Every time you think of taking a drink, think back to the reason you quit in the first place. That reason will always be valid.

SoberLeigh

Hang tight, ElleDee, early days are the most difficult; things get better with time but we have to allow that time to pass. Glad you are finding AA helpful. Have you looked into AVRT? Might be something helpful in dealing with the cravings.

Luper

ElleDee - hang in there! That first week is a tough one, but you made it!

Keep pushing forward!

FeelingGreat

Hi congratulations on holding out against your AV. It's going to give you all sorts of reasons why you don't really need to quit (sounds like it's started) but, health aside, your drinking was causing relationship problems too, wasn't it?

Stay strong, it's really worth it.

PurpleKnight

Keep pushing through!! You can do this!!

Mountainmanbob

I have seen the 90 in 90 get many off to a good sober start on a new life

hang tight -- the rewards are plentiful

MM

ultradad

Congrats on a week ElleDee!!!

I think once you get that sponsor and start working the steps things will get better! I know from my experience that meetings alone couldn't do it. I had to work the steps; that's where the miracle happens : )

ElleDee

All my SR buddies,

Thanks so much for your caring support. I know in my heart that if I do what I need to do, it will get better. *Sigh* Riding out those feelings is tough sometimes and yes, not only did I damage my health, I've damaged my relationship with my husband. I don't want to lose either so I must keep these things in the forefront of my thoughts.

biminiblue

It gets easier. Keep going.

If health reasons made you stop, remember that. Your health won't get better if you start up again and the withdrawals just get worse every time you go back.

See you on Day 8.

Have you signed in to the 24 Hour Connections thread? It's a good place to check in.

You're a non-drinker now.

ElleDee

Thanks Bimini,

I'm going to go check into the 24 hour thread.

hokey

Hey elle I know how hard the early days are ... been there a few times. Still there actually, I'm at 35 days. It gets better as time goes on and lots of meetings help. If I ever get that little thought about having "just a couple" I think back to my last drunk and the desperation I felt when I posted my "day 1 " thread. I go back and read my early posts to remind myself where I do not want to be. You can do this! Keep fighting the good fight. Sobriety is so worth it.

firstymer

ElleDee, as hard as this is, understand that you are doing EXACTLY what you should be doing. Keep pressing forward. I promise you, it will starting getting a little easier, day by day.

Good luck. We are pulling for you.

soberclover

I had a major health scare that finally got me sober. I had a brain injury as a result of a bad fall/seizure related to my drinking. They say that we can get off the elevator at any point...meaning that we don't have to hit rock bottom. You have been blessed with the opportunity to get sober now. Stay strong; you are worth it!

Serenidad

Hang in there ElleDee! I'll be thinking about you today! I'm trying to make it through the day too! If we go to bed tonight and the only thing we did today was stay sober...it was a GREAT day! Xo

Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery

ElleDee

Well it's now 3:15PM and I'm out of work in about an hour. I so want to stop on the way home and pick up a bottle of scotch. It's not getting any better today, even though I keep popping in here during work to read and post.

I'm miserable. I'm crabby. I am sick of the people I work with and I wish they'd stop trying to talk to me today. I just want to be left alone.

I'm saying to myself, why this constant battle?

Gonnachange

Hang in there ElleDee and don't stop by the liquor store. Try to get though the next hour and then rinse and repeat.

least

Congrats on reaching one week sober. Don't mess it up by stopping at the liquor store. Then you'll just have to start all over.

You can do this!

Stoogy

Hey ElleDee, it's a tough first few days of that there is no doubt, but you just have too push through on this to get the rewards you are obviously due.

We are all here for you.

bellaboos

Keep strong ElleDee, scotch is not going to make you less miserable, crabby or help you get on with your co workers..you know this deep down.
You are doing amazing!
Today will be a struggle but tomorrow you will feel so proud of yourself. Keep busy x