DJSobriety

Thanks for posting that, blackhawkfan. Before going sober, I would have checked "yes" to most of those. Yikes.

jason2

That seems very unprofessional. You most certainly should find a new doc. Best of luck.

Kitkat331

Hi JDN, welcome. I'm a little confused--alcoholic is not a medical diagnosis. It does not have a specific definition in the medical or mental health world--it is an AA concept.

"Moderate" drinking is usually defined as no more that 14 drinks a week for men (7 for women) and no more than 3 drinks in one day. Drinking in excess of that is considered unhealthy and puts you at greater risk of a long list of alcohol related conditions, but is not in and of itself a diagnosis.

That said, I self-identified as a high functioning alike when I quit. Like you, my liver functioning tests were normal, I was functioning well at work, home, etc. However, I felt that alcohol was taking up a larger and larger portion of my "head space", I was thinking about it way too much, and I had lost the ability to simply "cut back" (e.g. drink no more than 7 drinks a week) without an extreme use of willpower that I could not maintain.

Some people might be in the same situation I was in and choose to be satisfied with it. AA people would tell you that alcohol use is progressive and such people will eventually have greater and greater negative consequences. I'm not sure how much scientific backing that belief has. Clearly that happens for some/many people.

I'm glad I got sober. I feel much healthier and less ashamed of myself. I miss drinking sometimes (e.g. special occasions) but for me I believe it's not possible to have it both ways--I can't just drink a little once in a while and leave it the rest of the time. I tried. I don't know why I couldn't, but I couldn't. So, I've made peace with being in between two "imperfect" conditions and I've found sobriety to be better than expected.

I think it might be interesting for you to try it--try a 100 day challenge and see what it's like to not drink for 100 days. You will probably learn a lot about yourself and you can always go back to drinking later.

imhooks

I think that just about settles this discussion. Alcoholic is a term for someone who has the disease of addiction to alcohol. No matter how much you dislike the word, if you fall into that category then you must confront it head on and try to change your ways. Good luck to you.

NightsWatch

Welcome JDN!

I'll offer two perspectives. Both me and an ex would have failed those "Are you an alcoholic?" tests. He likes his beer and scotch and he partook frequently, almost daily, and he would almost always have two, sometimes three. More when we're out or at a party or whatever. When we were together, we drank approximately the same amount. The difference is, at the time, I had a little voice inside me wondering whether I had a problem (although I always easily dismissed it). I did not see that in my ex at all. It could certainly be that he just didn't share those concerns with me, but having lived with him, I saw that he could easily give it up or engage in activities or vacations without thinking ahead about having access to alcohol. Granted it's been a long time since we've been together so he could have a problem now for all I know, but I know that at that time, I felt like I potentially had a problem, whereas he did not, even though we had the same drinking habits. I absolutely don't believe that amount of consumption is an indicator of being an alcoholic.

That said, everything you say in your first post is very familiar to me, and I venture to guess, to a lot of the people posting here. I did not want to have an alcohol problem - to this day, I still have a hard time labeling myself as an "alcoholic" - and I thought of a lot of reasons to prove to myself that I didn't. I didn't want to stop not because I couldn't, but because I didn't want to stop! It's still my choice! I'm on top of it. I'm in control! Well, here I am, after years of telling myself it wasn't a real problem and I could stop whenever I really wanted to. Denial has immense strength when the thing you love is being threatened. To be clear, I'm not suggesting this is your problem, but it's something to keep in mind.

I hope you found what you were looking for here, and I hope you are one of those heavy drinkers without a problem.

JDNWATER

Sorry if you found my post and inquiries here intrusive and my presence unwelcome. I think generically labeling anyone who drinks a lot, but does not have problems to be an alcoholic to be a poor use of words and does a disservice for those who both do and do not have this serious condition. This seemed an appropriate place to discuss that I appreciated the input I received, even the replies that I disagree with.

Dee74

I have absolutely no interest in arguing with you or denigrating you in any way JDNWATER
I'm glad you appreciated the responses

If you have a substance abuse problem - you're in the right place
If you have no problem, I'm sincerely glad for you - have a great life and enjoy the heck out of it.

If you're here to pass the time simply by engaging in argument, I suggest there must be better ways to pass the time in Tampa on a Saturday night.

D

DisplacedGRITS

So would you be willing to quit drinking for a couple of months? Just to see how it makes you feel? Pretend you had to quit for a couple of months because of a medication you were taking for an infection or something. It's not really to prove anything to anyone. It's just a pretty simple test for your own knowledge. From my understanding, a normie could put aside their drinking if need be. An alcoholic may be able to quit, but they will be left restless and unsatisified.

What do you think? A physician has concerns about your drinking. The best way to inform yourself as to whether or not this is an issue is to perform a test and make an informed conclusion from the results.

Gottalife

If a few more doctors would call it how they see it instead of pussyfooting around the issue, there would be a few less dead alcoholics.

JDNWATER

I drink 3-4 nights per week. Not much on weeknights but a much larger amount on Friday nights and Sundays when I have more time. I never have more than 1-2 drinks on a Saturday and usually not at all. I do not prefer to drink quickly and like to sip Jack and water drinks over a long period of time with friends. I do this because I enjoy the relaxing effects of alcohol, but dislike being drunk and I do not enjoy being around people who are drunk. I have a high tolerance for alcohol and since I do not drink quickly over the course of a Sunday afternoon and evening I can easily drink most of a fifth. I very rarely get drunk and other than looking tired and the end of the night most people would be hard pressed to even know I was drinking if a glass was not in my hand.

You statement about denial is perplexing. How is one to answer the question. Either say you are an addict or others asking will assume you are and are in denial. This brings me to my original question. If alcohol does not pose, health, legal or personal problems for an individual, can/should you call this person an alcoholic? It seems to diminish a word that should be used to describe a serious condition that many suffer from.

imhooks

You drink nearly a fifth in a day???? You sir need to reevaluate your situation.

You may have 3-4 drinks, but how many ounces are those?

NightsWatch

This is a big point IMO that you're probably okay. Most alcoholics drink to get drunk. For me, there is no point in drinking, unless I'm going to get drunk. I don't "savor" any of the alcohol I drink, because I don't think it tastes good.

silentrun

Somewhere I crossed a line. The first time I knew it was the first time I had a blackout. Where exactly that line actually is remains blurry. It all began with abusing alcohol though. Drinking a 5th on a Sunday is alcohol abuse JD. You really don't owe anyone an explanation. This is your life. Your doctor is just trying to help because you may not be dependent but your level is abuse of alcohol. I asked my 51 year old husband if he has ever had a blackout. He was a heavy partier and drug user in his teens and early 20's. He has NEVER had a blackout. He doesn't have that thing in his brain I developed. So have you ever blackout?

JDNWATER

Thanks for clarifying. I also have no interest in arguing and it is not my purpose here. Having been recently told by my physician that he was in recovery and I was a high functioning alcoholic I wanted the opinions of others in recovery to see if they shared his viewpoint. It is nice in Tampa tonight. Hot and humid, but nice. Hope you are having a good weekend as well.

FeenixxRising

That's not what he said imhooks. He said on a Sunday he could drink a fifth in a day. He didn't say he drinks a fifth every day.

Gottalife

Your sound quite close to AAs definition of a "hard drinker", which is someone who drinks a lot but is not alcoholic. Phew! I hear you say

The major practical difference between the two classes of drinker is that the alcoholic will experience a lot of problems in all areas of their lives, where the hard drinker will cruise through without any drama. Phew again!

The similarity between the two is that if they dont stop, both will die well ahead of their time. I have outlived all my hard drinking buddies.
Oh Bugger!

FeenixxRising

I'm not crazy about labels. And I feel the term "alcoholic" is archaic, and I don't believe it's a term used much in the medical community. If your drinking doesn't cause you problems, then enjoy your life. Personally, I would see another Dr., as I feel you're the final authority on whether you have a problem or not. And if you do feel the need to stop, you will find a lot of support on this site.

Unfortunately, being completely honest can have consequences. A man in my state told a Dr. about his drinking habits and the Dr. reported him to the DMV. The man's license was revoked based solely on the Dr.'s report. The issue received quite a bit of local press.

Man Loses License for Drinking at Home

Serenidad

If you are drinking a fifth of alcohol every Sunday AND drinking on other days of the week, I would take a serious look at your drinking. Alcoholism is a chronic, PROGRESSIVE disease. I wish you well....but there are some serious red flags there! You also mentioned that you have a "high tolerance" to alcohol. So do most alcoholics. We metabolize alcohol differently. I'm an alcoholic and my husband is NOT. I can drink the equivalent of 12 drinks in a 6 hour period and be FINE. (And I'm a 5'3 135 lb female) He drinks two beers and is very buzzed (he's 6 feet and 200 lbs).

My good friend who I mentioned in a previous post walked into the ER with a .52 BAC. (.3 is usually fatal). (.08 is a DUI) She WALKED in and was talking & it too was hard to tell she had been drinking.

As others have said...if you really want to know if you have a problem, try going 90 days without a drink. If you find yourself obsessing, craving, etc etc or you CANT make it 90 days, that should answer your question about whether you have a problem.

Good luck to you. Eventually you will learn the truth about yourself. Being an alcoholic isn't the worst thing that could happen to you.

Sent from my iPhone using SoberRecovery

JDNWATER

I don't drink a fifth a day. If I did, I would have health problems. I can drink close to that on a Sunday afternoon and evening and because I water the drinks down and sip them slowly the total amount at the end of the day sounds like a lot and probably is why my doctor was alarmed. I always pour 1oz of Jack over ice and fill the rest with water. probably a 5 or 6 to 1 ratio. So, 2-3 drinks per hour over an 8-10 hour day and its not hard to get to 20 ounces or so and I do not get drunk from it.

DisplacedGRITS

Well, it sounds like you've gotten a lot of varied responses. None of us can diagnose an alcoholic. We're not medical professionals. All we can do is relate our experiences. We are alcoholics, therefore we are going to see things that either you don't see or that we are misinterpreting. We aren't your friends who have seen a slow and steady increase in your drinking. We aren't your friends who see you using alcohol normally and are unconcerned. We aren't your wife or your children who may be experiencing the negative effects of your alcohol use or not. Heck, we don't even know how old you are. All we know is that you use more alcohol than the average person. Doesn't make you an alcoholic but it does cause concern for some people.

We are a group of alcoholics who all started life sober. None of us just up and decided to drink alcoholically one day. I dare say for all of us, it was a gradual decline into a lifestyle that we could no longer live with. At one point, most of us drank like gentlemen and ladies. Alcohol worked to relax us in social settings, relieve our boredom, enhance our enjoyment of activities and take the edge off of a bad day. We all drank for many reasons. What we have in common is that at some point, we found that we were no longer drinking and finding what alcohol used to give us. Relief was temporary and soon we found our every day activities and thoughts plagued by anxiety and fear unlike any we had ever experienced. We no longer drank for pleasure. We drank because we had to. We were unable to eek out any joy or relief from life without the crux of alcohol. We did not want alcohol so much as we needed it.

This website is for people who have found that they are powerless against alcohol - that their lives have become unmanageable and who want the support of a community to recover and live a peaceful, sober life. If you are not powerless against alcohol, if your life has not become unmanageable and you do not need assistance to quit drinking then you will not get much from these forums besides conflict and confusion. Please don't feel that you have to justify your drinking to us. Your drinking is not our concern. If, however, you find one day that you meet the criteria to gain help from this website, please come back. At that point, your drinking is our concern and we will be here to help.