Songtx

Well, here I am. Friday night, just trying to make it through. Had a pretty decent day, pretty productive. The evenings are so hard, when my husband continues to drink. I get so mad, I want to throw things at him and scream and cry. I am not doing any of these things though, and he would not even know I am feeling this way, except for the fact that I may seem to be in a bit of a bad mood. I feel so lost without drinking and don't know what to do with myself. He has no intention of stopping nor does he admit to having any kind of problem. (I really wonder what he thinks about my stopping, does he wonder if it's hard? Does he wonder what it's like, does he wonder if he could do it? Dos he give me credit??) So, as per usual, he is drinking out in the yard and I am just sitting here watching TV and cooking dinner. He went out and got more beer a minute ago, so he likely will not be eating dinner or spending time with me tonight...I am keeping busy, reading books by folks who got sober. I am also transferring the money I would have spent on beer into savings every night that I stay sober. So far I have saved about $40. Thanks for listening!

least

No matter what your husband is doing, and why, do this for you! You're worth it.

melki

Love the idea of transferring the money saved on not drinking! Do something special for yourself with it. When you feel less angry, I'd suggest talking with your husband about your struggle and your feelings. Just not when he's drinking and you're angry. Pick a peaceful time. Good luck on getting through tonight and the weekend!

LBrain

sorry to hear you have to go this alone at the home. Hang in there. Do your best to avoid his drinking and stay focused on yourself. If you can find a meeting to get you out of the house while he drinks.

neferkamichael

Songtx, 9 days sober is FANTASTIC, congratulations. In spite of the temptations you sound so positive, happy to hear it. That $40 will be $4000 before ya know it. Why not right a song about it, rootin for ya.

DisplacedGRITS

Not sure if your husband's an alcoholic but if he is, he's most likely thinking about how your newfound sobriety will effect him. Most alcoholics tend to be very self centered people so all we see is the impact things will have on us. Empathy is something that many alcoholics seem to struggle with. Keep your head down and focused on your sobriety. Him seeing the gradual, positive change in you is one of the best things you can do to make him reflect upon his drinking.

PurpleKnight

Great job on Day 9!! Keep it going!!

recoverholic

Good job! Keep up the good work!

instant

Its our own relationship with alcohol that we have to deal with. I am sorry about your situation but you have taken the first steps to a healthier life.

i bought a guitar at the end of my first year with the money. i have money for new clothes and minor luxuries.

it will take time for emotions to settle down- for me it took about six months

ultradad

Congrats on day 9 and WOW, I know that must be hard having your husband drink while you try to quit! Have you spoken with him and told him how you feel? Maybe if you explain how hard it is for you he would consider at least not drink at home. Have you joined a 12 step support group?

melki

How are you doing with your weekend, Songtx?

IOAA2

Hello and congratulations with hanging in there. When we get sober we do it for ourselves. I/we have no power to get someone else sober or drunk, like it or not.
If this is an issue with us perhaps visiting Friends and Families Forum on this site will help. Al Anon meetings in most areas has helped many to become sane again.

BE WELL