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I am so so sorry

Old 06-27-2014, 02:06 PM
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I am so so sorry

Hi all i dont really know how to say this but after 4 days on the wagon on day 5 i have fell off. Thing is i dont just feel i have let myself down i feel i have let down all of you who have been supporting me. I dont know what to do now whether to try again or what. Please forgive me i have taken all your advice on board i just had a weak moment many of which i had already dismissed but today i had a stressful day and gave into the alcohol. Do i regret it yes the worst thing for me now is that quite a few people on the group were on the same day as me and now i am back to square one as i am weak.

Love to all and any advice gratefully receieved xx
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:09 PM
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Go at it again!!

Many of us have been there, but you gotta sort out that after work plan, develop new coping mechanisms, those that don't drink can deal with stress without alcohol and so we can too!!

Get back on that wagon, and push through, we're all behind you!!
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:12 PM
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Originally Posted by tizzkins View Post
I dont know what to do now whether to try again or what.
I vote for another try!

I fell for that lie many times, have a few drinks, you'll feel better.

Your post doesn't sound like you're feeling better. I never did either.

Tomorrow is another day. All of us against the addiction. Get back in the fight!
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:15 PM
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Tizzkins,
This is an illness, no a matter of weakness so don't be too hard on yourself.

I see in earlier posts it was suggested you go to AA but instead of taking the advice you decided to do it your way and this is the result. No problem, we all do that and it usually helps us get a better understanding of our problem.

I can understand your fear of meetings. I doubt I could ever have just walked in off the street. What I did was to call AA and arrange to talk one on one with someone about my problem. That person, having won my confidence, then took me to a meeting and looked after me until I could find my own way.

You now have a clear choice. Call AA, go to a meeting, or repeat the failed experiment.
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:16 PM
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You lost one battle. Get back in there and win the war.
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:18 PM
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Tizz, you must not give up. This disease is relentless.

We are here for you
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:22 PM
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If you can make it past the first week, the second week is easier. Then the third week is easier yet.

Please just start again. Eventually something clicks. It's just a decision you make to not pick up that first drink and pour it into your mouth. Simples.
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:30 PM
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No apology needed from my POV. Just keep trying -- that's how it's done.

If it were as easy as flipping a switch, recovery programs and websites would not exist ...
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:31 PM
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Tizzkins, I had my share of false starts, too. The important thing is to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and keep going. Sobriety isn't easy, especially at first, but it is so rewarding once the chaos stops and things start looking up.

I know it seems hard now, but try to use this experience as an opportunity to learn more about yourself and your triggers. Are there people, places or things you need to avoid for a little while? Is there a healthier way to blow off stress on a hectic day? Believe it or not, you can become even stronger in your journey toward sobriety because of today. It's how you handle it going forward that matters.
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Old 06-27-2014, 02:48 PM
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Aww sweetie...I just spent some time reading old posts of mine from 2007 only moments ago. I spent a good while here back then...relapsed. I was here awhile last year...and left.

I have fallen 3 or 4 times since May trying to get back on this horse.
(And holy moly..I don't wanna scare newcomers here...but some of us struggle harder than others...of which I am one. Real slow learner in this respect).

Get back on the horse. I want sobriety more and more and more...especially after my last fall.
It is what I want and NEED most of all. It has to be my everything. Sobriety is the passage I MUST take to make my life the one I KNOW it can be.

I am humbler today than I think I ever, ever have been. I have been full of bluster and determination before...thinking I will never drink again.

Sobriety is a gift...one I receive and have to earn everyday. Every darn day.

Saddle up.
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:01 PM
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Once you start the real rule is never give up on giving up, as long as your not just between drinks it will eventually click, but the sooner you start the easier and you can build on your sober time and learn from this.
All the best.
John.
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:19 PM
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Please keep at it Tizz. You are not weak - you're an alcoholic. Be kind and patient with yourself as you give it another go.

You could've gone away and not said anything - but you came back because you're not through trying. Never stop reaching out for a better life. You can do this, and we are with you.
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:21 PM
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It might look like some of us just decided to quit one day and we never wavered and life's been great ever since...but it took me 15 years to get to here Tizzkins.

Pick yourself, look at what happened, think about what more you can add to your staying sober plan...and move on

If I can do this - you can too
D
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:24 PM
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And I'd say get rid of the habit of apologizing. You don't owe anyone an apology for this, at least not here. You're accountable to yourself first of all. Guilt is a useless emotion and is not at all productive. Learn from it and move on.
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:24 PM
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You're not weak, you're addicted. That's entirely different. Try again!
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Old 06-27-2014, 04:32 PM
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Oh Honey. No apology necessary. Yes try again. It'll stick, I just know it will.
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