mcorreia

First post, am 54 years old where to start. My alchoholic mother died in April. She was 88, a high functioning alchoholic since age 17. I married her 3x. Have 3 adult children by two fathers, both are dead from their substance of choice. Was divorced from both, am married now but separated, have permanent guardianship of 2 grandchildren ages 2,1. There mother has been a meth addict since age 16. She wanted to and did live with her father, where it began. My oldest daughter is an alchoholic since age 18, she is 32. My son is 35, has always struggled with substances but keeps ruin at bay, his serious issue is anger. I am and have been so sad. How did all this happen. My son tells me I'm 0 for 3. I'm the common denominator. not so deep inside, I know he's right. My oldest daughter sent me a text that I am going to f-ck up these babies like I did them. She put in text my greatest fear. I tried my hardest to be a good mom, have always worked f/t, maybe too much, but I was it. Told all 3 of them they did not have the luxury to experiment with drugs/alcohol. It's been a nightmare watching their self-destruction, my mother enabled my oldest daughter, I hated her. I am so ashamed, do not know anyone else that has zero relationship with ALL their adult kids. I LOVE my grandkids so much and am Glad they are with me. Biggest fear is that they will turn against me as well. I sound like a baby, thanks for anonymously being there.

Nonsensical

Well, dang, that's a plate full and then some. have you ever sought support for yourself at al-anon or another group that helps people with addicted relatives? Sounds like you could use some support and clear-thinking, unbiased advice.

Welcome to SR. You might check out the Friends and Family Forum. Lots of folks there who have the experience of dealing with loved ones' addicitions.

Friends and Family of Alcoholics - SoberRecovery : Alcoholism Drug Addiction Help and Information

Good Luck!

PurpleKnight

Welcome to the Forum mcorreia!! you'll find loads of support here!!

Soberpotamus

Welcome to SR! That's a lot going on for you. You'll find support here from those who relate. Glad you're here

ScottFromWI

Welcome mccoreia. Sorry to hear of your troubles, but kudos for you for seeking help and being there for your grandchildren. As nonsencial mentioned, we have a forum here specifically for family and friends of addicts...I think you will find some wonderful info and people there who face similar issues.

Dee74

Hi mcorreia

I'm really sorry for your situation, but I'm glad you found us. You'll find a lot of support here

For their own reasons, people can say hurtful things and go for our weak spots. And decent people tend to take those things on board.

Doesn't mean they're true tho
D

mcorreia

thank you all for your encouragement..was/am surprised to see these notes...thank you, am going to click this friends and family title..thanks

MythOfSisyphus

Welcome to SR, mcorreia! It sounds like you have troubles but you're still on the green side of the grass, so there is hope!