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First AA meetig yesterday

Old 06-17-2014, 05:38 PM
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First AA meetig yesterday

Day 8 of no drinking. I went to my first meeting yesterday just to try it out, the people were nice and I didn't feel bombarded by any means which was great. I'm going to try out another one tomorrow that somebody recommended to me. I'm not having temptations for beer like I imagined I would but I'm at that odd little fork in the road where you start to question if you should stop completely or if you could just cut back. I know I'll always go back to drinking too much so I really want to continue full sobriety. Any advice on staying motivated?. I really don't want this to be another two week fling.
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:07 PM
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cutting back is the same as postponing it. The sooner you say "No More!" the better you will feel about it. And the better you will be in the long run.
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:11 PM
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If you sit on the railroad tracks and a train comes along, it's the first car that's going to kill you: the engine - not the second car or the caboose.

That first drink is the one from which you have to stay out of the way. We alcoholics don't do moderation. No. Such. Thing.

Congrats on Day 8.
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:26 PM
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I'm on day 8 also, whenever I start to feel good again I always think I should celebrate my non drinking days by drinking. I tell myself I can handle just a few beers and that I deserve it. I know I can't just have a few with me it was always get really messed up or it wasn't worth it. When I want to drink I have to remind myself of the hangovers,the money spent,the regrets,the depression and anxiety,not remembering what I said or did,making myself look like a fool. When I think of all that it makes my cravings almost diminish.
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Old 06-17-2014, 06:39 PM
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Originally Posted by eliza24 View Post
I'm at that odd little fork in the road where you start to question if you should stop completely or if you could just cut back. I know I'll always go back to drinking too much so I really want to continue full sobriety. Any advice on staying motivated?. I really don't want this to be another two week fling.
Once you know you're a problem drinker, the odds of ever learning to moderate are practically nonexistent. The idea that I could moderate has probably been the impetus behind about 90% of my many unhappy returns to the madness of daily drinking. I won't say there aren't a handful who have been able to do it, but I personally don't know of any.

I know it is really, really difficult when you're on the sober side of things to remember the essence of what it was like to be a drunk. You can recall that it was unpleasant, but not exactly why. Unfortunately, it's far easier to remember the times it was pleasant, but if you're anything like the rest of us here, the pleasure of drinking has long since vanished and you will never be able to get that back. The good news is you don't need to, and you'll be far better off without it.
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Old 06-17-2014, 07:14 PM
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Originally Posted by gettingbetter64 View Post
I'm on day 8 also, whenever I start to feel good again I always think I should celebrate my non drinking days by drinking. I tell myself I can handle just a few beers and that I deserve it. I know I can't just have a few with me it was always get really messed up or it wasn't worth it. When I want to drink I have to remind myself of the hangovers,the money spent,the regrets,the depression and anxiety,not remembering what I said or did,making myself look like a fool. When I think of all that it makes my cravings almost diminish.
Agreed. It's a pretty ridiculous thought to have, the whole celebrate by doing what you're trying to stop thing. I have that feeling almost every time I go a significant amount of time without drinking. By the way, Congratulations! You made it through the first week!.
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Old 06-17-2014, 07:15 PM
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Originally Posted by biminiblue View Post
If you sit on the railroad tracks and a train comes along, it's the first car that's going to kill you: the engine - not the second car or the caboose. That first drink is the one from which you have to stay out of the way. We alcoholics don't do moderation. No. Such. Thing. Congrats on Day 8.

That was a great analogy, thank you. I definitely needed to hear that and I know for a fact I'm not going to drink tonight.
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Old 06-17-2014, 07:21 PM
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Originally Posted by GetMeOut View Post
Once you know you're a problem drinker, the odds of ever learning to moderate are practically nonexistent. The idea that I could moderate has probably been the impetus behind about 90% of my many unhappy returns to the madness of daily drinking. I won't say there aren't a handful who have been able to do it, but I personally don't know of any. I know it is really, really difficult when you're on the sober side of things to remember the essence of what it was like to be a drunk. You can recall that it was unpleasant, but not exactly why. Unfortunately, it's far easier to remember the times it was pleasant, but if you're anything like the rest of us here, the pleasure of drinking has long since vanished and you will never be able to get that back. The good news is you don't need to, and you'll be far better off without it.


Very true, I really do envy the people who can just have a few, I'm really the only person I know who gets out of control while under the influence (well, at least out of my friends and family) I always glamorize drinking a few beers at a barbecue or having a glass of wine with dinner but I never think of the Minute those beers or that glass is empty. It's kind of disgusting when you can't enjoy a single drink because you're constantly worried about how or when to go get more. Thank you for your insight!.
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Old 06-18-2014, 03:15 AM
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i was told if I forget my last drunk I haven't had it yet. well, fortunate for me theres a crapload more I haven't forgotten. they will all materialize again if I pick up a drink.

yup, I had some fun when drinking. for every fun time theres at least 100 miserable,disgusting times.
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Old 06-18-2014, 03:44 AM
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Something that has helped me was when one woman shared that she could enjoy her drinking or control it but never both at the same thing. That totally shocked me because it was so obvious and so true but I never thought about it that way. Most of my relapses involved me drinking one, maybe two beer. A glass, maybe two of wine. No, not hard liquor. That's too much. Just a bottle or two....I should by a 6 pack. It's cheaper and I'll have something for tomorrow...later tonight. Just one more, I need to feel it. Uhoh...gotta get another 6 pack so...so I can...well, I'm just going to get it. I'm good....(or) just a couple of glasses. Well, one more can't hurt. Mmmmm...I'm almost there. Just another glass...well, the bottle's almost done. It would be silly to not finish it. I should grab another bottle. Tonight didn't go well but I'll be more careful next time...

My relapses always started with me not accepting the truth. I'm an alcoholic who drinks alcoholically. That's it. It's written in stone. It is an immutable truth in my life and I must accept it because I cannot change it. Abstinence is not control. It's non engagement. The enemy can't kick my ass if I keep my end of the peace treaty.

Honesty. Truth. Acceptance. So far, it's not just keeping me from a relapse. It's changing my entire life. When I was an active alcoholic, I thought my life would always revolve around alcohol. When I first got sober, I thought my life would revolve around not drinking alcohol. Right now, my life revolves around truth, honesty, acceptance, fellowship and service. My life revolves around life. Wild.
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Old 06-18-2014, 04:21 AM
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Originally Posted by eliza24 View Post
Day 8 of no drinking. I went to my first meeting yesterday just to try it out, the people were nice and I didn't feel bombarded by any means which was great. I'm going to try out another one tomorrow that somebody recommended to me. I'm not having temptations for beer like I imagined I would but I'm at that odd little fork in the road where you start to question if you should stop completely or if you could just cut back. I know I'll always go back to drinking too much so I really want to continue full sobriety. Any advice on staying motivated?. I really don't want this to be another two week fling.



A newcomer was at a meeting and had done enough research to realise that they were alcoholic and could never drink safely.

They were heard to ask an old timer when they should take the steps, to which the old timer replied " when do you want to recover? If you want to recover now, we'll be taking the steps now. If you want to recover later, I guess we can put off the steps, but you will probably drink again"

This is good advice. There are always exceptions to the rule, but it is a much safer course to take the advice than to try and be an exception, then find out you're not.
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Old 06-18-2014, 05:57 AM
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Glad the meeting went well!! . . . I agree with the first drink being the worst, plan and change your routine so that the first drink won't happen!!
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Old 06-18-2014, 06:07 PM
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Hi Eliza

I had to change my life to stay sober cos my old life was all about drinking.

You'll get out of your recovery what you put into it., so give it all you have

Keep it well maintained - especially on the days when that's the last thing you want to do

D
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