First post - hope at last (day 90)
Hello all,
I've been visiting and enjoying this forum on and off for for the past year or so and thought its about time to post.
I've battled with alcohol now for quite a while, years in fact. It has affected every single area of my life. I almost managed to lose everything.
I tried every way to quit (including sporadic attendence at AA and endless counselling). Every attempt failed. Each and every time I relapsed my drinking became even worse.
It got to a point where I simply couldn't go on living with alcohol but I certainly couldn't manage without it! Things reached a real low in December 2013. Following a week long binge I managed to get off it for a few days and spent a lovely (sober) Christmas day with my family, determined and full of promises that this time would be different and that I would never drink again. The following morning I woke up and went straight to the off licence, drinking non stop for almost another week. It was a complete blackout, as if someone had just turned out the lights.
That was it - rock bottom. I just couldn't go on doing this to myself and family, especially my 3 young sons. I realised that for me the only option was to go for a residential programme and entered a treatment centre on 24th March. The 6 week programme ended in early May and was by far the most difficult thing that I've ever gone through in my life. But also the best!
Since then I haven't had a drink and it has completely turned my life around. I have so much energy these days and no longer have to deal with that sense of dread and self loathing that would dominate everything following binges. It's still very early days in my recovery but I have a strong feeling of hope which is amazing. Yes there have been and will continue to be difficult times but I will use all the support thats out there to stay sober and enjoy life:beachball | 