Double Digits but I'm down now and want a dozen
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 425
Double Digits but I'm down now and want a dozen
Today is Day 10!
I can't believe how fast time has gone.
I thought that not drinking would slow down time because I spent so many hours drunk/sleeping etc.
Time was very slow last week, but it seems to have picked up pace again.
I was very emotional last week, and I loved it.
I has highs that were so high I'd classify it as mania.
I had amazingly painful lows. I'm a guy and I don't cry, but I teared up at least 4-5 times last week, it was beautiful.
I had some major victories last week. I had a wonderful meet up with my ex and I was able to apologize and reveal to her that I had a drinking problem.
She since then has not contacted me, which gets on my nerves, bc you think she would check to see how I'm doing, but self-centeredness was a reason that I didn't tell her in the first place.
My record for sober days in a row was 4 for 2013 and 2014 and I've shattered it.
I went to Atlantic City (for those that don't know it is a mini Las Vegas on the east coast) Drinking and drugs are everywhere. I didn't even come close to going to one of the bars that have 24/7 happy hours ($2 shots/ $2 beers) although I did think that was a pretty good deal---if you wanted to ruin everything you've worked for.
So as ScottfromWI likes to say: "I've come back to earth"
I'm off the pink cloud and I'm really emotionally flat right now. A bit sad, but not sad enough to learn anything from it. I'm begining to seeing very clearly why I drank in the first place.
1. I'm lonely
2. I'm bored.
3. School is hard.
Interestingly enough, drinking would fix these feelings in about 40 mins flat, but then tomorrow I'd still be lonely, bored, school would be hard, and I'd be sick.
Are these really problems of mine? or problems drinking has caused?
1. You wouldn't be lonely if you hadn't started drinking. You lost so many friends and significant others because of drinking.
2. You wouldn't be bored if you hadn't started drinking, you have no hobbies and you don't know what to do with yourself in the evenings anymore!
3. School would be a lot easier if you hadn't drank yourself to stupidity during some of the most important years of your educational development.
Thanks for listening.
I can't believe how fast time has gone.
I thought that not drinking would slow down time because I spent so many hours drunk/sleeping etc.
Time was very slow last week, but it seems to have picked up pace again.
I was very emotional last week, and I loved it.
I has highs that were so high I'd classify it as mania.
I had amazingly painful lows. I'm a guy and I don't cry, but I teared up at least 4-5 times last week, it was beautiful.
I had some major victories last week. I had a wonderful meet up with my ex and I was able to apologize and reveal to her that I had a drinking problem.
She since then has not contacted me, which gets on my nerves, bc you think she would check to see how I'm doing, but self-centeredness was a reason that I didn't tell her in the first place.
My record for sober days in a row was 4 for 2013 and 2014 and I've shattered it.
I went to Atlantic City (for those that don't know it is a mini Las Vegas on the east coast) Drinking and drugs are everywhere. I didn't even come close to going to one of the bars that have 24/7 happy hours ($2 shots/ $2 beers) although I did think that was a pretty good deal---if you wanted to ruin everything you've worked for.
So as ScottfromWI likes to say: "I've come back to earth"
I'm off the pink cloud and I'm really emotionally flat right now. A bit sad, but not sad enough to learn anything from it. I'm begining to seeing very clearly why I drank in the first place.
1. I'm lonely
2. I'm bored.
3. School is hard.
Interestingly enough, drinking would fix these feelings in about 40 mins flat, but then tomorrow I'd still be lonely, bored, school would be hard, and I'd be sick.
Are these really problems of mine? or problems drinking has caused?
1. You wouldn't be lonely if you hadn't started drinking. You lost so many friends and significant others because of drinking.
2. You wouldn't be bored if you hadn't started drinking, you have no hobbies and you don't know what to do with yourself in the evenings anymore!
3. School would be a lot easier if you hadn't drank yourself to stupidity during some of the most important years of your educational development.
Thanks for listening.
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Join Date: Sep 2012
Location: Ireland
Posts: 25,826
Hey Serper, thanks for sharing!! 
As you say alcohol may numb and help you to forget those issues, but not necessarily fix them, the problems would still exist in the morning.
Great job on 10 Days!! Keep pushing through!!
As you say alcohol may numb and help you to forget those issues, but not necessarily fix them, the problems would still exist in the morning.
Great job on 10 Days!! Keep pushing through!!
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Join Date: May 2012
Location: Wisconsin, USA
Posts: 16,945
Originally Posted by Serper2014 
Today is Day 10!
Are these really problems of mine? or problems drinking has caused?
1. You wouldn't be lonely if you hadn't started drinking. You lost so many friends and significant others because of drinking.
2. You wouldn't be bored if you hadn't started drinking, you have no hobbies and you don't know what to do with yourself in the evenings anymore!
3. School would be a lot easier if you hadn't drank yourself to stupidity during some of the most important years of your educational development.
Are these really problems of mine? or problems drinking has caused?
1. You wouldn't be lonely if you hadn't started drinking. You lost so many friends and significant others because of drinking.
2. You wouldn't be bored if you hadn't started drinking, you have no hobbies and you don't know what to do with yourself in the evenings anymore!
3. School would be a lot easier if you hadn't drank yourself to stupidity during some of the most important years of your educational development.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 425
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI
I would answer all 3 with this: You aren't drinking now, so what you did in the past doesn't matter. You can make new friends, find new hobbies/past times, and do well in school starting now. You have your entire life ahead of you, consider how lucky you are to have made this choice to get sober now before it took all of that away from you.
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Join Date: Jan 2014
Posts: 8,637
Originally Posted by Serper2014
I guess you are right. I'm only 25. I'm glad I caught this at an early age. I have that to be greatful for.
But I'll tell you what; I really wish I had caught it at 25 instead of waiting until I was 41.
It would have been really nice to have avoided those DUIs and another decade and a half of remorse, misery, financial waste... OH!!! the financial waste.....
You have the opportunity of a lifetime in this. Literally.
Honor that opportunity!!!
Congrats on ten days. Keep it going.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 425
Originally Posted by JJ9
10 days---Amazing!! I liked how you described feeling your feelings and loving it. Sounds nice!
Yeah I'd rather feel my feelings then go back to the numb hell I was in.
I'd rather feel sad than feel nothing.
I'd rather feel anything other than self hatred and anxiety.
I haven't smoked, drank, or taken anti-anxiety medication in 10 days. (FYI I never abused the anti anxiety medication, but I drank like a horse and smoked like a chimney lol)
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Location: Grass Valley, CA
Posts: 358
Originally Posted by ScottFromWI
I would answer all 3 with this: You aren't drinking now, so what you did in the past doesn't matter. You can make new friends, find new hobbies/past times, and do well in school starting now. You have your entire life ahead of you, consider how lucky you are to have made this choice to get sober now before it took all of that away from you.
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Join Date: Feb 2014
Posts: 425
Originally Posted by gvrecovery
Great advise, you are extremely fortunate to be pursuing sobriety while young, if you want to know what happens over 40 years, let me know. Keep up the great work!
I would like to know actually...
Even though it doesn't seem like a long time. I've been drunk for half of my adult life... Which is mindblowing to me...
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Join Date: Feb 2014
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Originally Posted by Faceless
Two! Hehehe!
Are you 100% sure that you are done?
If you had to think about that for more than a second, then you're probably not done. I'm not speaking of you personally. I'm talking to my old self. Every time I "quit" there was a little part of me that knew I was going to drink sometime again. This time I don't have that feeling.
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