Nonsensical

I know what you mean. I'm bald, but I don't go to the Bald Guys support group because the other bald guys might judge me for being bald.



You can do this.

Joe Nerv

It's not uncommon to hear someone say at a meeting: I told people I was a compulsive liar, a thief, a cheat... I neglected my kids, abused my wife, peed my pants, got arrested regularly, and the people at AA told me, "Keep coming back!." And then they even gave me their phone numbers!

While the people in AA are of course human and imperfect, there is more love and acceptance in most meetings than I've felt in any other group of people I've ever been a part of. Most things you've done that you're ashamed of, we did also. And many have done lots worse. It's not about judging people and guilting them into sobriety. It's about accepting them until they can accept themselves, and loving them back to health.

desypete

so what your saying is you want to go to aa which is a power greater than you as you belive it can help you stay sober ?

think about it : )

also i dont belive in a god at all and will not say god in meetings as it brings up the image of god from the bible and Jesus etc
so i will not say anything about a god at all as its not part of my daily living
however being good and kind and helpful are part of my daily living and by practising it i feel better about myself as a person i dont dislike myself anymore and i am free of that compulsion to drink

the aa program works i just have to remove the god word and replace it with the word hp or high power or aa or love

FlyerFan

Who cares what other people think of you? They don't know you. Let them think what they want.

Also, in AA, we are all equal, none of us is any better than another.

KAD

No, I don't believe AA is a power greater than myself. If we got down to brass tacks, one could say an admission that one is powerless over alcohol makes alcohol one's higher power! What I want out of AA, in a nutshell, is to not feel so alone anymore. That is all I seek, and to hear from other people who don't look at me like a deer in the headlights or like I'm sick or hopeless because of the hell I've put myself through. That's what I want out of AA. People tend to distance themselves from you if they know you have an alcohol or drug problem. Hell, even other people who have the same problem(s) themselves often distance themselves from you!

I get what you're saying, I think, and understand the distinction you are making between organized religion and just being spiritually at one with yourself. I don't really know what that's supposed to feel like as I was brought up in fundamentalist Baptist churches and religion was rammed down my throat sideways on a regular basis. Really screwed me up! I appreciate what you've said here though and it does sink in a bit. Thanks!

schnappi99

I've heard a few stories now about people ending up with a very different higher power than they grew up with; often because the "childhood" higher power was rammed down their throats. An alanon share I heard a week or 2 ago was raised Christian, had long abandoned God because of the church.. she started with her higher power being the group conscience & later on developed a relationship with a God of her choice... don't know if that means she started going to a church again now or not but it really doesn't matter.

I'd say seek what you want in the program, leave the other stuff aside. Might be what you want changes over time, might not- its your recovery.

FreeOwl

AA is a very welcoming program and the people there want to help, want you to be free of your struggles.

They're PEOPLE - so sure, there may be instances and individuals that rub you wrong or that don't honor the principles of the program - but those are the exception.

I first encountered AA by order of the state back in 2004. I did my minimum time and never looked back, citing all kinds of reasons it wasn't for me.

Ten years, a second DUI and countless blackouts and hangovers later - I now see AA as a powerful tool in my assorted pillars of strength in sobriety. I don't go - all the time. Heck, I haven't been to a meeting in a couple months. But, I will go again and I have read the Big Book several times. I'm looking forward to going to meetings at a local detox center once I have my 6 months in. I Don't follow the program fully - but I've used the steps. I don't see God the way many in AA do... but I get how my own conception of spirit is another ally in my sobriety.

I've never regretted going to an AA meeting since I became serious about sobriety. Many times, I left the rooms thinking it should be called "humans anonymous" - because a lot of what the meetings were about were simply dealing with the stuff of life as a human. Maintaining happiness and balance and gratitude through life's ups and downs and doing it without having to turn to an escape. Alcoholic or not - that is something we can ALL use.

So, I'd urge you to acknowledge your fear and then go check out AA anyway. Go to a few different meetings if you can. Participate if you feel like it, just listen if you're not ready.... you have nothing to lose and your life to gain.

ultradad

When I went too AA I wasn't looking for friends, like-minded people or any of that!
I needed a solution to stop drinking...everything else I tried failed miserably! I had become pretty agnostic and had no religion to speak of, but somewhere along the way I have found a higher power and that took humility and honesty. It took me finally having enough hurt and pain that I didn't really care what the AA program called for I was going to do it because the only sober and actually 'happy' people I knew that were real alcoholics were in AA and doing the work!

I think we have to be willing to do whatever necessary in order to beat this disease or else we'll just keep spinning our wheels until those consequences come that are irreversible!

My experience is that my pride and ego is what always kept me out of AA and away from any form of higher power! I'm wishing you the best and will only say it's worth a try and honest try. AA didn't give me my life back, it's giving me a brand new life! I am grateful!