Robert777

from this terrible affliction. I am really starting to think this site is full of only heavy drinkers with the odd few real alcoholics. Some of you make it seem so easy. I am at my wits end.

Robert777

Ive gone to rehabs, Ive gone to AA, ive tried AVRT, ive tried using this site, NONE of it keeps me sober. I am so ******* sick of this ********.

FeenixxRising

"Real alcoholics"? As opposed to "unreal alcoholics"?

You may want to spend some time reading the stories posted on the Stories of Recovery sub-forum. I'm pretty sure the majority of those members were more than heavy drinkers.

As far as stopping goes, well, like anything else worth obtaining, it takes effort, patience and persistence, and sometimes a little help from others. So don't give up on yourself. And if you need help, ask for it. Today could be the beginning of something great, if you want it.

Nonsensical

I never found any sobriety in comparing my level of addiction to anyone else's. What are you going to do next to stay sober?

Robert777

Yeah real alcoholics as apposed to those who are only heavy drinkers. Those who suffer the disease of alcoholism as opposed to heavy drinkers who can stop drinking when things go bad in their lives. There IS a difference.

FeenixxRising

If you're sick of it, then it's time for you to fight for yourself. You can get sober, period. Never doubt that.

PurpleKnight

It's far from easy Robert, I spent a year between deciding I needed to stop drinking as it was ruining my life, to actually being able to achieve it, that was something more than being able to flick a switch.

Whatever definition that put me under, the solution was still the same, I needed to quit alcohol and be Sober.

I think the principles are the same, but the method of recovery is different for everyone, whether we need to increase our support structure, create some accountability, take steps in our pattern of life or lifestyle to marginalise temptations/cravings of alcohol.

It can be done, but I don't know many that just woke up one day and had it all worked out!!

Robert777

I am not comparing ones addiction to another. I am questioning how many people on this site are real alcoholics and who are only heavy drinkers that can stop when the consequences get too bad.

Robert777

Ive been fighting for years now. It seems it's all I do. Struggle.

Nonsensical

If you were the only real alcoholic on SR, would it change what you have to do to stay sober?

Robert777

I don't accept that is the case. I know there are real alkies on this site. I don't know the magic secret to staying sober. Only failure in trying to do so. So what is the mysterious magic answer to alcoholism??? How can some work one program and others not at all? That is very confusing to me.

Robert777

I think there are quite a few frauds on this site if I am being honest.

SonomaGal

Dear Robert777 - I'm so sorry you're struggling!!! I'm not sure there's any benefit for you in deciding that the hundreds of positive stories here aren't from 'real alkies', or that it is easy. This sounds like your AV trying to convince you that you're beyond help and thus can't get well. This is false! You can recover if you don't drink. Yes, it can be unbelievably hard, but at the same time you have to admit it's very simple as well. I hope others can offer more insight

Robert777

Thank you but I will NEVER admit this is very simple. That is insanity to me. I am going to one last rehab soon and if that doesn't work, well then I'm doomed.

PurpleKnight

I'd say it comes down to the same question as to why some can drink moderately and be "normal drinkers", compared to others that have a problem with alcohol.

We are living, breathing organisms, our genetics, mental, physical and emotional make ups are all different, this causes variables.

Some need an inpatient detox and some can detox at home, some have been drinking for 30 years and some only 5 years before making the decision to change their life. I'm sure a thesis could and has been published on the variables making up the human organism.

The important thing though is to address your own variables and come up with a plan that works, it's not easy though, I agree!!

northof49

I don't think getting and staying sober is easy for anyone, just reading the posts here proves that. Resisting the urge to drink gets easier with time, but that's about it. Alcoholics will never "recover" from this disease, it will be with them lifelong! What you can "recover" is the person you were before alcohol took over. The question only you can answer is "which person do you want to be" It's a simple question to ask yourself the next time you wrap your hand around a bottle or glass.....

ReadyAtLast

I don't think anyone is a fraud. If someone has a problem with alcohol and it is affecting their life in a negative way then it is a problem for them. Whether they call themselves an alcoholic, problem drinker, heavy drinke, binge drinker etc is not really the issue.

Everyone's different. Different things work for different people- maybe look at what you have in common with others and look at what you are going to do to get sober and do what works for you.

aasharon90

It's never easy giving up things in life
we luv. However, when it comes to where
the things we luv cause more harm to death
than good, then its time to make some
changes.

I didn't choose to get sober the very day
I was hauled off to rehab in the back of
a police car. In fact I was mad as hell that
my family called the authorities to come
pick me up because I was unwilling to go
freely to the hospital to have my stomach
pumped after injesting pills and alcohol
the night before.

I was definitely of not sound mind nor body
when I sat in the back seat of a screened in
backseat and handless door. What am I gonna
do, jump out? Of course no one knew my
mind set when I tried to end my life.

No, it was not easy having to learn how to
remain sober day in and day out. Sure I wasn't
drinking, but living life on lifes terms was kicking
my azz big time.

I had to surrender and follow others like a
lost or whooped puppy, just so sad, because
I thought for sure I was stronger than that.

I had to get off my high horse, get off my
pedestal, get off my pity pot, suck it up and
follow some directions, suggestions on how
to stay sober with a program of recovery as
a guideline.

I did what was taught to me all to the best
of my ability, sometimes with a stubborn head,
sometimes with additude adjustment, doing
the next best thing, one foot in front of the
other, crying, pounding the steering wheel,
sometimes yelling to the skies for help, strength,
reprieve, anything for relief of the struggles
I was going thru in recovery and life.

Today, I don't struggle as much, and if I
do, I have ALL those awesome recovery
tools to fall back on, all the teaching of
my addiction to follow up on, to get back
on track and remain grounded, healthy,
happy and honest in life.

Today, I pass on to the newcomers struggling
with addiction, HOPE, that if I can, like so many
have, learn to stay sober one day at a time,
incorporating a recovery program in our every
day life, then, so can you.

Now that is as simple as It can be for me.

Steve027

Either way we are all struggling with our addiction and coming to this forum helps us out a lot. Heavy drinking eventually leads to alcoholism so we all need to support each other here and reserve all judgement

Nuudawn

I am not sure what I call myself Robert. I have quit a good number of times. The quitting part I can do...it's the staying quit I have trouble with.

What does that make me?
I want to quit drinking.
I went to AA the first time in my 20's. I probably put together a month or two of sobriety...then I started drinking again.

I went to AA ..again...just before I hit 40. I put together 7 or 8 months...then I went back out.

I quit again last year...with a counsellor and SR. I put together just over 4 months of sobriety...then I went out and drank again.

I'm just shy of 3 weeks sobriety.

Am I a heavy drinker or an alcoholic? Hmmmm...pretty sure an therapeutic professional would likely put me in the latter category given my track record.

I have NOT been able to stop drinking for any good length of time.
I say that makes me a person who suffers from addiction.
Do I go into the DT's when I stop drinking...no?
Can I quit drinking based on the evidence?
My odds ain't good now are they?

We are ALL here because we want to stop drinking...well actually...we don't want to stop drinking really...if we had a choice.

We don't really have a choice. Addiction has taken the ability to choose ..like I would choose one shirt over another.

I want to stop drinking...and it's hard.
So I'm here.