obssesed
Member
Join Date: Jun 2008
Posts: 478
I would also ask yourself if you are ready to - in a hypothetical relationship with this woman - deal with her past hurts? Even though I have forgiven many people for many things they have done to me it has shaped the way that I view them and the way that I trust them. It has re-wired me in such a way that I am incapable of seeing them in the same light I one did. Would you be prepared for her to be with you feeling that you're a different person than the one she used to love? In more ways than one?
Just a question.. but my opinion would be the relationship you lost will never be the same even if she comes back. You can pound nails in a board and remove those nails (with sorry's and birthday cakes) but will the board ever be the same? Nope.. it will always bare the holes placed in it by the nails. It can't be any other way.
Congratulations on your sobriety. Keep moving forward.
Just a question.. but my opinion would be the relationship you lost will never be the same even if she comes back. You can pound nails in a board and remove those nails (with sorry's and birthday cakes) but will the board ever be the same? Nope.. it will always bare the holes placed in it by the nails. It can't be any other way.
Congratulations on your sobriety. Keep moving forward.
Guest
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Ashburn, VA
Posts: 30,196
Keep yourself busy! Work the steps of AA if you choose that as your recovery method. Trust in your HP, and he will heal both you and your ex-girlfriend.
This will all be clearer in another year's time (when you've got a lot of sober time under your belt).
This will all be clearer in another year's time (when you've got a lot of sober time under your belt).
Member
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Gatineau, QC, CA
Posts: 5,100
I list a few relationships when I was active in my addiction.
I think about them often, but know that the things I have done are not small things to brush under the carpet.
The fact that they won't come back proves to me that they were special and strong willed. I only wish them the best.
I also realized I think about them mostly when I'm lonely. Now that is selfish.
I think about them often, but know that the things I have done are not small things to brush under the carpet.
The fact that they won't come back proves to me that they were special and strong willed. I only wish them the best.
I also realized I think about them mostly when I'm lonely. Now that is selfish.
Member
Join Date: Jan 2013
Location: Mid-Atlantic USA
Posts: 2,441
Originally Posted by sameer1974 
i dont think she was interested in me she was just taking a chance since she had a bad divorce and she had more interest in my property then me.the moment i fell to tough times she backed out
Be kind to yourself, keep strong with your commitment to sobriety and good things will come. Obsessing about a lost love is a huge waste of time and emotional energy.
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