Tetra

I have a lot of problems with my mom. I have been doing a lot of work on this with my therapist. He said to me to try and have compassion for her, that clearly she is suffering and has even more baggage than I do.

Anyway, she has decided to go away for a while. Unfortunately my dad can't go for a few weeks so she asked me to go away with her. I gave it some thought and we are going to France next week. I have to say that when we go abroad she is always in better form. She won't leave the house here in case she meets people that will ask about her crazy kids but she loves travelling. I thought about it a lot and I decided to say yes. A bit of sunshine would be nice. I will be away for about 10 days and when I come back my dad will fly out.

As it happens, my Grandmother is also going away with my aunts. So I said to dad, what will I do when everyone is gone? He smiled and said "mind the house, don't burn it down and lock the door if you go out".

To say I was surprised is an understatement. I am very happy that they are even considering this. I have worked hard over the past 7 months.

My mom got upset this morning. She says she is fat and needs to lose at least three stone before my brothers wedding. I don't think that she looks that overweight but I am trying to be nicer to her and I do know that when she's away from home, she enjoys going for walks and things.

So here's hoping we don't kill each other! I can just imagine the headlines in the French newspapers!

zerothehero

Have a good time. I think the compassion advice could make difficult moments more tolerable.

SoberLeigh

Hope you have a wonderful time, Tetra. This could be an opportunity for you and your Mom to make a good memory - you can draw upon in the future to help soothe and balance the unpleasant ones.

Where in France are you going?

HeadLump

I think you are incredibly forgiving, Tetra, and your mum is very lucky to have you as a daughter. You're also warm and compassionate. I hope the holiday brings out another side of your mum and maybe draws you closer together and that you have a great time. I also hope you'll enjoy the freedom waiting for you back home. You've surely earned that

And, of course, we'll all be here to listen and support at any time

least

Enjoy your time in France.

Thepatman

I hope that this traveling opportunity will allow you guys to build a healthier relationship. I had a hard time with my mom at some point in my life.
But after we developed and equal level of respect and based our relationship on friendship things got super cool.

When she passed we had everything sorted out, that gives me piece.

Bon voyage et surtout pas de vin ou de biere! !

Tetra

SoberLeigh, we're going to the south of France

Ruby2

You will be just fine Tetra. Are there things you are interested in doling while there? Maybe make some plans for time to explore on your own? That way you will have some time apart if you need it. Scope out some Internet cafes so you can send emails to friends or check out SR while you are away.

You can do it. I'm envious. South of France. Sounds lovely!

SoberLeigh

I was hoping you would say that. Have you ever been to Eze? It is this beautiful little village very close to Nice. The most beautiful part of Eze sits atop a high hill with a beautiful view of the Med; it is so much fun to spend a day there just meandering along the narrow streets atop the hill; there are some of the most charming and enchanting doorways along the streets. Hope you can include it in your trip.

I am excited that you have this opportunity to spend "time away" with your Mom.

Verte

Good for you Tetra...no, I do not think you are mad. May you make some great new memories in France with your Mum.

Tetra

Thank you all for the advice, and thanks SoberLeigh will try to check it out x