Alcoholism - is it binary or a continuum?
 

When someone posts about the possibility of moderation, the usual response is that if one is indeed an alcoholic, moderation is not on the table. I'm curious whether alcoholism is binary, meaning that either "you is or you ain't", or if it's a gradation of alcoholic tendencies with different probabilities of relapse?

I don't think there is a concrete answer to this question. I would ask you why it even matters though. A couple of months ago you wrote this:

"I'm about 40 days sober and have no business judging anyone's choices, but I realized 2 basic truths: 1- the quality of life has improved in almost every regard. In other words, compared to heavy daily drinking, sober living is way better"

http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...ml#post4546431

Do you think perhaps your addiction is asking this question to see if you can try moderated driking again? Based on your response above ask yourself why.

The desire to drink recklessly seems progressive to me, and generally has been as I have gotten older. When I moderated at times and thought I "had it under control" (i.e. limited to weekends only, or whatever that means), it always came back eventually just a little bit worse. I'm not really sure science or medicine quite understands addiction, but I know that trying to moderate has caused many problems for posters here, including myself.

scott nailed it.

one thing we who have struggled with the negative consequences of addictive behavior with alcohol tend to share in common is we live in our heads a lot. We can be wicked smart.... which can lead us to make some wicked stupid decisions about alcohol.

my initial reaction to your post was "he's over-thinking it".

I've been there.

I wound up thinking myself right back into a whole lotta blackouts and regret.

I put together just over 4 months of sobriety here last year. I was a regular poster here on SR and I think some folks thought me kinda clever.
Apparently I thought I was pretty clever too.
I thought I was so damn clever that I had this drinking thing figured after decades of drunken debaucles and many vows to swear it off for good.

Ya...turns out I was swindled by my own Id.
I'm back with hmmm...not even two weeks of sobriety.
A little humbler me thinks.

Basically if you can't take it or leave it - and I can't - then best to leave it.

Besides the typical answer that it doesn't matter about qualifying the root cause of alcohol issues, I'd say if you came searching for this site the answer is you test positive.

Alcoholism seems to follow inverse proportion, in that the severity of one's problem increases in direct proportion of one's denial of it.

I guess it was easy to interpret that question as an attempt to rationalize starting again. Not the case. I was just curious about the nature of addiction.

I tend to think I have a mix of genetic predisposition, was influenced by being raised in an Alcoholic house and a bit of mental illness in the mix.

I have no control on all the above except to never drink again and work on my loose screws. ;-)

For myself I believe I was born alcoholic. So many of the characteristics existed long before I drank or drugged.

I was not raised in an alcoholic household and my childhood was basically good but once I discovered altered states I thought I'd discovered nirvana.

I do know once the switch has been flipped there is no going back. A Pickel will never be a cucumber again

All I know is that within the continuum of life I drank and did not drink with varying quantity for varying periods of time. After a bit of reflection, drinking made things unnecessarily difficult in my life with many lasting effects...all of which I can live without.

For the ~5 weeks committed, post light-bulb moment, to not drinking...the only thing that was lacking during my drinking days was clarity. Alcohol itself can offer me no further insight as I unwind it from every strand of my life.

Everything I want and deserve will come from me and those with whom I choose to spend my life. Not from alcohol. So I 'ain't' :)

:grouphug:

I believe it is a valid question as a curious human wants to know cause and effect. As far as I know, there is no universal scientific test or framework that predicts everyone's outcome associated with imbibing alcohol. I am told to be careful on the newcomers board with these questions as people with severe problems are easily triggered into drinking again as the 'addictive voice' reads threads like this in the wrong way.

I had similar responses to these questions. Asking questions about addiction, how it affects other people, is fascinating to me. It has played such a huge part in my life I'd like to understand it better. Often on these threads asking such questions is misinterpreted as talking yourself back into drinking.

.

What I would like to know is whether addiction is learned or an innate personality trait, and if it is the former whether you can take steps to change this.

Your point is well taken Tang.

I would characterize my addiction as a continuum. That continuum was irreversible in the sense that once I crossed a certain point there was no going back to any semblance of control. The genie was out of the bottle at that point. However, even once I crossed that threshold it continued to get worst and worst.

The reason moderation doesn't work (for me at least) is because there is no going back in time to the way things were in the beginning of my using. When I thought about moderating (or chipping in my case) I was really just wanting to go back to the way things were in the beginning. Even if there was some 'magic' way for me to only dose at some regular, pre-determined time interval I would go crazy from the cravings in between doses. That didn't happen in the beginning of my using, and that is why moderation seems like a catch-22 to me. If someone else saw that I was only using at certain preset times they might think that I was moderating, but the cravings would be destroying me on the inside.

Apologies, I totally misinterpreted your question.

I'm genuinely curious who, in your opinion for your question, here in the SR newcomer's forum qualifies to answer your question? Is there a specific type of drinker/alcoholic from whom you are requesting information?

This question is in all seriousness. I'd like to understand.

I'd say people with first hand experience of alcoholism are probably the most qualified people to give their thoughts on the matter, except perhaps a psychologist with knowledge of this sort of thing.